Print

Please login or register.
1 Hour 1 Day 1 Week 1 Month Forever
Login with username, password and session length

[KittyTac]

Granted. The spaceship is flooded.

I wosh that the 9th letter of the alphabet would be replaced with "o".

[Mathel]

Granted. Iota is replaced by Omicron. Since we are using latin letters and not greek, we are unaffected.

I wish for various elemental dragons.

[PTTG??]

Granted. Your loyal and intelligent dragons act as servants and trusted bodyguards. Unfortunately that makes you the single most dangerous person on the planet, and several very well-paid assassins slip past your guards; as your dragons squabble over which shall be your successor, the collective armed forces of the world rally and destroy your dragons.

I wish that the following wish retroactively didn't forbid online translation.

Granted. It has to be granted by PTTG?? without using an online translator.

Ni méra ana her- nique- angaina ecet.

[King Zultan]

Granted, but the programs can't translate the words.

I wish for everyone on earth to be turned into zebras.

[Mathel]

((It is in Quenya))

Granted. All ecosystems fail as every creature turns into a zebra. This also results in many zebrasplosions where many creatures were in the space of a zebra (such as anthills).
First to die are zebras in regions that do not support them. Then zebras in regions that did, as the overpopulation causes them to starve.

Then plants that need insects to spread pollen fail to pollenate and over time die out.

Earth now belongs to plants which do not require any creatures, such as coniferous trees.

I wish for every insect of the Diptera order to be exploded using a tiny amount of 1,2,3-trinitroglycerol.

[Dunamisdeos]

All flies, mosquitoes, etc on earth are immediately destroyed by an exceedingly accurate rain of quadrillions of post-it notes. Inscribed upon each post-it is the word "boom" using 100% pure nitroglycerin as an ink.

I wish for a nintendo.

[Enemy post]

Granted, but it's actually an original Xbox controller, a Windows 98 monitor, and a PS3 copy of Half-Life 2: Episode One.

I wish for a pet T. Rex.

[King Zultan]

Granted, but its small and made of plastic.

I wish for every human to be replaced with a zebra.

[Mathel]

Granted. And every zebra that did not just replace a human gets replaced by a random human who was replaced by a zebra. Since there are fewer zebras than humans, many humans are disappeared. But humankind is not wiped out.

I wish for a pet living Coelophysis.

[Lunardog15]

ok but it eats the forms
I want a pet water bear the size of a cat

[MrLurkety]

ok but it eats the forms
I want a pet water bear the size of a cat

Granted, but the square-cube law means that it collapses and can't do anything.


I wish to be better at making bad puns.

[King Zultan]

Granted, the puns are so bad people that hear them immediately try to kill you.

I wish for all matter in the universe to be replaced with potatoes.

[pikachu17]

Potato.
Potato Potato Potato Potato Potato(I wish the previous wish had not been granted)

[Mathel]

Granted. In order to ungrant the wish, its granter was DELETED from the timeline.

I wish for a pet PotatOS.

[Dunamisdeos]

Granted. In order to ungrant the wish, its granter was DELETED from the timeline.

I wish for a pet PotatOS.

Wish genie needs to learn more.

...hmm..



Your toilet now runs Linux. It requires you to access this new OS in order to flush or clean it. To save work, any new toilet you buy will have this OS magically transferred to it upon purchase. It only understands/displays Finnish, and since toilets lack a monitor it physically prints out all text in post-it-notes.

I wish for a comfortable chair from which to play my strange amalgam of a gaming console.