Episode 2- Duds, Burgers and 1920s Kung Fu Oh yeah! Our first movie is out! Let's see if its playing at the local single screen cinema across the lot.
Wait. The hell is March of Destiny?
What. We didn't make that! Turns out, Gneiss Pictures isn't the only game in town. And looks like our bribes aren't going through. Right now, there are four other picture makers to look disapprovingly at!
THE COMPETITION. RAH RAH RAH!
Sadly we are dead last in all regards. 0.4 stars! Our studio star rating is a composite product of the quality of stars, movies, wealth, and lot. Right now all of these metrics are shit. BUT DON'T COUNT OUT THE UNDERDOGS.
Obviously our studio rankings aren't gonna sit on our asses, so I take a couple of wannabe's and throw them into the TRANSMOGRIFICATION MACHINE and they spit out two more actors for our studio!
Meet our first recruit! From one thousand or so years in the future and a 25-star General with crippling sexlexia, its Zapp Brannigan! His portly figure hides his future mastery of Sci-fi action acting!
The futuristic spacesuit is terribly out of fashion in the 1920s. I change him into 'normal' clothes before he has a stylistic meltdown
He immediately goes to chat up the only female star on the lot, probably about how sexy he thinks he is. Typical.
*GASP* IS THIS THE START OF THE BURNING FLAMES OF PASSION?
Not getting any suggestions until too late, The star TRANSMOGRIFICATION MACHINE spits out someone random. Meet our forth star....
Barney Calhoun Abraham Lincoln! (Barney Calhoun has been input as the next star in a later update) Its a fact that he faked his own death, found the fountain of youth and went to Hollywood to pursue his true passion: ACTING!
Hail to the chief, baby.
Seeing our 'success' with THE SPACE MONSTER, I task our screenwriters to churn out another Sci-fi scripts for Alfimi. And so they type. In the meanwhile, our stars get a short break. Iron tests his mettle with that newfangled 'put the ball in the hoop' sport. While Aflimi does the old pastime of putting large amounts of meat into bodily orifices.
BALL!
EAT!
The screenwriters throw me a script for something called Tower Hamlet and I immediately have the dynamic duo of Iron and Alfimi work at turning it into a movie! Maybe it will use the Spacy Spaceship set this time.
I was wrong. *Shakes fist*
Wait a second...just one damn second...this looks kinda familiar... Same outfit...Same extra...No... GOD DAMMIT SCREEN WRITERS, YOU GAVE ME THE SAME SCRIPT AS THE LAST MOVIE. GAHHHHHH
The year is 1923, and our second movie is literally the same as the other one. Let me repeat...WE MADE THE SAME MOVIE AGAIN, BUT SLAPPED A DIFFERENT TITLE SCREEN ON IT. *Shakes fist some more* So much for innovation in the field of moviemaking....
To the exact same rating as before. Heh
Even the reviewers are sure they have seen this before...though "REV_MOVIE_STARPERFORMANCES_L1" is kinda suspect
In order to get some sort of
originality out of the screenwriters, I have him do something different. Maybe say an Action movie? They throw me a script for "Menu of Disaster" and I send Iron and newcomer Zapp Brannigan to deal with it.
Rare footage of Zapp as an angry chef who knows martial arts. ON THE GOD DAMNED STAGE AGAIN! *shakes fist*
These harebrained screenwriters have a disturbing obsession with the stage, even though I have transplanted Iron's weird cellar onto the lot. Newly found funds from our subpar movie releases allow me to plop down a shady bathroom set and a desert set for good measure.
I bet a whole lotta [redacted] occurs here.
Lots of [redacted] probably happens here too.
Once Menu of Disaster wraps up filming, I let it out onto the wild, where we are rated....
....GOOD GOD ALMIGHTY
The less said...the better.
THE STAGE IS CURSED. CURSED I TELL YOU! NO MORE!
I MUST CLEANSE THE LOT OF THIS FILTH!
BACK TO THE ETHER WITH YOU!
...and henceforth shall no stage stain our films!
I immediately task the scriptcrew for another Sci-Fi script. Maybe this time they will be
original! So let's talk about the script writing process and how it works in this game. Script quality is defined by length. That's all there is to it. You could theoretically have a movie where ten scenes are shots of actor A walking through a door and it'll be heralded as a masterpiece of cinema. But for now, most of our scripts come from the 'Basic screenwriter's hut' which will churn out one star max quality scripts. Most of these will be pregenerated templates that take into account what our stages are. That's one reason we got a duplicate script as our second movie. As we unlock better quality screenwriter buildings, so too will the quality of scripts produced.
Now that there's no Stage set on the lot, I finally get a screenplay that uses our spaceship set. YAY! Title: THE BUGMASTER. Iron and Alfimi again collaborate on this next Sci-Fi opus.
Spoiler alert: There are no bugs, masters, nor bugmasters in this film
During filming, I get a news bulletin about a couple of blokes who have decided to fly around the world. Who cares? Apparently the public does.
NEWSFLASH!
These are timeline events that represent the passage of history. These influence what genres of film are popular or unpopular with the general public. This event gives us a plus to future action films. I take an action script that's lying around and have our two spare actors have a go at it. Here's a fun fact, actors can direct and directors can act! What versatility! As shooting for the action film "Drumhead Justice' begins,
Yes, Abe Lincoln is dressed as a Union Soldier. Don't question Zapp's direction!
filming on "The Bugmaster' ends....
AND ITS OUR BEST MOVIE TO DATE! ONE STAR, BABY!
Having directed a good three/four films in a row, Our main director man Iron seems a bit frazzled. He goes to have a bite of food to calm himself from the horrors of work.
One bite.
Two bite.
By 1925, I receive news of an inaugural 'so-called' award ceremony for us movie making folks. No worries! Truly the judges will know the
TRUE ART our studio produces.
Three awards for the taking.
The awards are for Best Actor, Best Film, and Highest Charting Studio! Not only does winning give us large amounts of prestige, they also give us bonus perks! Its a shoe in.
Well Fuck.
We leave empty handed. Though they did announce a new award for the next ceremony in five years! Its an award for most prestigious studio lot and we are gonna take it for ourselves! After the awards show, we are sent to an achievement page. This page will keep track of our progress throughout the entire game and will award us with new sets and buildings as we reach new milestones. YAY FOR GOALS!
Aim high, Gneiss. Aim high.
And that's all for this update folks. We're pretty okay financially with the recent movie blitz so no financial suggestions this time. We'll be unlocking the research building very soon, so we'll have more options later on.
So: I ask, what type of movie do you want to see next time?
-More of the same: Action, Sci-Fi?
-Something completely different: Comedy, Horror, RomanceBONUS!
-
Menu of Disaster, our worst film yet-
The Bugmaster, Our best film yet...which is not saying much
Author
Topic: Lets Play! The Movies SE -Update 7- Super PR Blitz Go!! (Read 16171 times)