Bah, i've never differenciated between man and woman for my military. If you are stupid enogh to bring your baby in the middle of a battle, it simply means that your genes are not suited for the cruel world of DF. Natural selection.
Moreover, it causes a lot of !!FUN!! and creates beautiful stories of murder and revenge!
This.
Also I just can't be bothered going through and checking my dwarves genders and relationships.
Dwarf Therapist.
I never use therapist, also it would still cull my recruitment pool from "useless dwarves" to "useless dwarves with no chance of ever having children"
Also...
Women only carry babies for a couple of years, after that the toddlers starting chilling in the meeting hall working on their fort domination skills.
From the Wiki:
Most creatures, including dwarves, start out as infants, then after a certain number of years become children, and then finally become adults.
For dwarves, childhood starts after reaching one year of age, and continues until age twelve.
They only carry them for a year, and with how sparse sieges are these days chances are there won't even be a battle during the time the baby is being carried around.