Quarter Finals Round Match One Turn Two or ThreeAnyway, another bitter and another raft of treble 20s!
Having got up after a short doze in his Official Darts sofa-chair, IronyOwl steps up to the oche with intent, darts, and a pint of bitter! He drinks it quick, and starts on his raft of darts:
[6>5+2] He's only gone and thrown the second double triple twenty of the morning! Crikey! And for the second time this morning, the umpire has to ask him to play a bit more gentle, like, and gives him a stern Verbal Warning for Ungentlemanly Use of Excessive Force!
That leaves IronyOwl needing only 1 to win the Match – and as the umpire explains for the sake of the newcomers in the crowd who don't know very much about darts, this means you have to split the 11, and quite literally place a dart between each 1.
[1>6+2] Unfortunately IronyOwl splits the bullseye! The umpire considers what to do, and decides to do nothing, and IronyOwl has one more attempt on the 11:
[6>5+2] IronyOwl splits the 11! And, indeed, the board!
IronyOwl receives another Verbal Warning for Ungentlemanly Use of Brutal Violence, and is declared the winner!
He will play the winner of Wolfkit vs NAV in the first semi final.
IronyOwl:
Points left: 0
Pints drunk: 2
Verbal Warnings: 3Devastator:
Points left: 187
Pints drunk: 1
Bleeding wounds: 1
HP: 10/10Quarter Finals Round Match Two Turn ThreeAnother bitter! 3 treble 20s again!
Sensibly opting to order and drink another pint of bitter, Wolfkit hope to further his lead by hitting a treble 20. It could just work!
[1>2-3] Or, you know, Wolfkit could throw the dart so hard it ricochets off the darts board, shoots directly upwards, and severs the wire holding up the spotlight just above his head, which then smashes down on him, slicing off his left ear.
The crowd go the wildest they've yet gone! They do like a showman.
It doesn't really put Wolkfit off though – he accidentally severed his thigh with a dart once: severing an ear is nothing in the world of Professional Darts. He aims again:
[3] A single 20! Better than a fleshwound! His last throw of the dart, as it were, approaches, and:
[3] Another single 20! At least he walks back to his seat with more than no ears!
Mix all 3 beers, then throw a triple treble twenty.
NAV, aiming for the controversial crown, mixes a pint of lager, a pint of bitter, and a pint of mild, thereby ruining them all and spilling two thirds of each over his trousers! A pint glass can only hold one pint, as a famous Black Country philosopher once said, and NAV has fallen foul of this famous aphorism, and now looks like he's wet himself! The crowd don't know what to think – ruining two perfectly good beers and a pint of lager is pretty horrendous, but playing darts whilst looking like you've not quite reached the toilet in time is pretty sweet! NAV decides the best thing is just to get on with it, and throw a trible treple twenty:
[3] Single twenty!
[3] Single twenty!
[5] Treble twenty!
His best flock of darts of the morning!
NAV:
Points left: 159
Pints drunk: 3
Verbal Warnings: 1
Bleeding wounds: 2
HP: 6/10Wolfkit:
Points left: 211
Pints drunk: 3
Verbal Warnings: 1
Bleeding wounds: 2
HP: 7/10Quarter Finals Round Match Three Turn ThreeOne more bitter!
2x triple 15, 1x double 15!
If it goes badly, but not overly so - try triple 20. Or bullseye. Whatever gets me closer to zero. Yeah.
Sarrak works out how best to achieve exactly 105 goals as he finishes off his third pint of the morning, and confidently steps up to the line, dart in hand.
[2] He misses! Next triple 15...
[5] Triple 15! Total success! He only needs a treble twenty to win now, so the umpire decides there's enough conditionality in his intentions above, and...
[3] Single twenty! Not so bad, really - he can still win with his next herd of darts!
Bite off a part of my darts and throw them with all the rage in my soul at the trip treb 20.
SaberToothTiger needs to catch up quick and attempts to do so by chewing off part of his darts: [6] they certainly look more streamlined now, but part of one of the wings gets caught in the back of his throat! He starts choking mildly, but steps up to the oche with his tampered darts collections nonetheless. Let's hope the umpire doesn't call him out on this one!
[4+1] Triple twenty!
[6+1>6+1] Trip- Oh crap! The dart busts right through the triple twenty, knocking a hole through the wall behind and sending the board crashing to the floor! As the umpire comes over to give a Verbal Warning for Ungentlemanly Use of Mighty Force, he notices SaberToothTiger is now choking heavily on his darts bits, and gives him a second Verbal Warning for Ungentlemanly Choking! The umpire gives him several pelvic thrusts and hammers ferociously on his back before sending him over to the nearby medic for a quick check up.
SaberToothTiger:
Points left: 76
Pints drunk: 0
Bleeding wounds: 1
HP:7/10Sarrak:
Points left: 40
Pints drunk: 3Quarter Finals Round Match Four Turn ThreeI shall endeavor to make myself clear.
Have a bitter. I need something a bit stronger in me.
Trip 18. Repeat until SOMETHING is hit.
Double 17 if the above was hit. Whatever adds up correctly if something else is hit. (Trip 18 again if Trip 1 or Trip 4 is hit, if double 18 is hit go for bullseye then double 2. If I can't figure it out, just throw really, really, hard.)
The finishing line is in sight for Toaster, but just as he starts to launch the first of his swarm of darts at the triple 18, Playergamer walks up and [5] starts a lengthy discourse on Why Toaster Is Actually Quite a Good Chap and Drinks the Right Drink, putting him off for a dart!
[1-1>5-1-3] Which almost proves fatal, but luckily isn't, just quite painful, as Toaster ends up on the floor with a dart in his thigh! The nearby medic rushes out and cuts Toaster's trousers off, pulls out the dart, and dashes away excitedly holding the souvenir above his head.
[4] The next dart is somewhat more successful, hitting the triple 4 leaving only 76 to be got for Toaster to win: he just has to hit the double 38.
He can't figure that out, so throws really, really, hard, and [1>6-3] hits the single 1.
More bitter. As my opponent is throwing, give a speech accepting him into the club of fine drinkers.
1 Double 20, 1 Treble 20, 1 6.
His speech finally over, Playergamer walks to the line, aims, swings, and...
[3] Gets a single 20! He's down to 86, so aims for the treble 20, and...
[4] Gets a double 20! He's down to 46, so goes for the 6, quite reasonably, and...
[1>3-3] Playergamer ends up with a dart through his earlobe! It's not bleeding yet, but it looks like it might turn nasty if he pulls the dart out!
Toaster:
Points left: 75
Pints drunk: 3
Bleeding wounds: 1
HP: 9/10
Trousers worn: 0Playergamer:
Points left: 106
Pints drunk: 3
Verbal Warnings: 1
Bleeding wounds: 1
Darts in ear lobes: 1
HP: 7/10Crowd:
Average Pints Drunk: 4.5
Current Favourite: Wolfkit, Playergamer, SaberToothTiger, NAV,
Current Unfavourite: SarrakGiven that all 4 matches are full, I guess I'll join the waitlist if such a thing is allowed.
Er, I don't know if I'll continue past the first final but you're in if I do.
GM Note: If there is an obvious route to 0, such as the only route available in IronyOwl's case, then I'll roll that for you, it would be silly to make you go for another, in this case, 60.
edit: Current World Rankings have been added to the second OP.
Author
Topic: Roll to Dodge Darts - turns 2.5, 2, 2 and 2 (Read 5890 times)