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[Aseaheru]

Asparagus needs to grow 3-4 years before you can start to harvest it...

[jax3639]

Most of my apocalypse plans revolve around if ~25% of my friends survive
for some reason most of my friends have some sort of hunting, survival, etc. experience/training
luckily what I lack in ability to survive by myself I make up for with the ability to lead

also,

CelestAI?

*shakes fist*
It made me chuckle
curse you!

[WillowLuman]

Yeah, I'd most likely stick with my family. If you can get together a colony of Bay12ers, I'd say Meph and Wierd are probably the most apocalypse-ready I know of.

Who wants some worst case scenarios?
Vacuum metastability event - don't need a plan for this, because game over, man. End of the Universe
GRB - No way to see it coming, all you can do is look worriedly at aged stars with their poles aligned in our general direction. Barring people living like dwarves, I doubt there'd be many survivors, but still some hope
Large Impact - Another likely to leave few survivors, especially anywhere within a couple hundred miles of the coastline, but with sufficient food stores it may be possible to wait out the impact winter
Supervolcano Eruption - All of us in the US and Canada are probably going to die in this scenario. Unless one of the others goes off. Gas/filter masks are a must for everyone else, the air will be saturated with tiny bits of glass for a while. Will also likely blot out the sun for a while. Should be noted that early humanity already survived one of these.

[Baffler]

Eastern European bay12'ers may have a decent time of things if they go to the Wieliczka Salt Mine outside Krakow.

[Cthulhu]

What we really need is for someone to compile a detailed set of directions on how to rebuild modern technology starting from just stone tools and working upward from there, using them to collect and refine better raw materials, craft better tools, rinse and repeat. Working up through bronze, iron, steel, and eventually getting to plastic and silicon and organic chemicals and weapons-grade plutonium. (and of course all of the side technologies achievable at each stage, and including only the best versions of each technology for any given point in the progression. The point is to compress 10000 years of development into about 100 by removing the need to actually develop the technologies; speaking of development however, it should also include an overview of engineering and of the scientific method, so that the new society doesn't stagnate into a pathetic Adeptus Mechanicus-style cargo cult)

Edit:

It is imperitive that the world not be allowed to descend back into pre-industrial lifestyles and social mores. That would be worse than humanity being destroyed entirely

Yeah ugh, close knit communities living off the land and integrating with the natural rhythms of their ecosystem?

Disgusting.

[WillowLuman]

I think he means more like falling into superstition and absolute xenophobia.

[Cthulhu]

That would imply that the industrial world isn't xenophobic and superstitious.

[WillowLuman]

Oh, it is, but you've got to admit to at least some progress. As bad as things might sometimes seem now, they were worse in the past.

[Loud Whispers]

Yeah ugh, close knit communities living off the land and integrating with the natural rhythms of their ecosystem?
Disgusting.

Agreed. We must dig deeper and recover the lost artifacts of german engineering yore.

Planting stuff is kind of a mixed bag. Potatoes, for example, are a fairly low-maintenance crop - and in my garden, at least, continue to grow in spite of efforts to remove them.

I can attest to the ease in which growing potatoes is achieved. I myself did it first time with almost no hiccups, the flaw was that the potato plants were all murdered by a tenacious and hungry squirrel fattening up for winter and I myself could not guard the plants all day nor tend to them all week. In an apocalypse I would have much more free time to farm and less distractions to take me away from potato.

[scrdest]

Eastern European bay12'ers may have a decent time of things if they go to the Wieliczka Salt Mine outside Krakow.

Well, I guess that's my plan, then. That, or the lesser known Bochnia Salt Mine, which is still an actual mine IIRC. And they already have living quarters set up in there.

[Cthulhu]

I don't know, I wasn't there.  I don't subscribe to the narrative that things are necessarily professing or improving either, that'd fall under the superstition I mentioned earlier.  Maybe things are better our maybe they're worse.  Maybe neither.  Post-industrial life I'da monotonous hellscape but maybe subsistence farming was too.  They both entail working your whole life to maintain a low level of existence. 

Maybe modern and premodern life is equally dreary.  That's why the first and last step of my apocalypse plan is carbon monoxide poisoning.

[Arx]

I'll just sit here in the posterior end of nowhere laughing at you guys. Unless sea level rises, or the apocalypse somehow gets here, in which case I'll flee into the mountains. I know a handful of good places to camp out, most of them highly defensible and with excellent views.

[pisskop]

I'll just sit here in the posterior end of nowhere laughing at you guys. Unless sea level rises, or the apocalypse somehow gets here, in which case I'll flee into the mountains. I know a handful of good places to camp out, most of them highly defensible and with excellent views.

Actually, I would consider moving to Nowhere, Fast.  Would you recommend the area?

[Illogical_Blox]

Well, most of humanity, including us, would starve to death, so food would be necessary. I would try to stay in my house. It's in the jungles of Central America, somewhat defensible, with dogs, guns and a load of food. 

[Culise]

Planting stuff is kind of a mixed bag. Potatoes, for example, are a fairly low-maintenance crop - and in my garden, at least, continue to grow in spite of efforts to remove them.
My long-term plan would probably be along the lines of "acquire zillions of canned foods, grow and preserve many vegetables". It's not infallible, but it's probably more reliable than "hope for cucumbers".

Rhubarb is another plant that is remarkably stubborn in my experience, good for vitamins C and K in particular, and the stems can be harvested in from spring on through late summer while the roots are left intact to continue to grow.  The only major thing to watch out for is the toxicity of the leaves, in case one is unfamiliar with it, but one shouldn't be eating potato greens for much the same reason.  Kale's another option for greens.