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[BadLemonsXI]

Be like *-.-
Show him around the ship.

[Spinal_Taper]

FIND SPACE LINK. TAKE SPACE LINK TO SPACE FORBIDDEN FORTRESS.

[Yoink]

>Do my action that got, like, totally skipped, man.

[Orange Wizard]

Aw crap. People remembered this thread. Now I need to update it again.

[Lyeos]

Aw crap. People remembered this thread. Now I need to update it again.

^Literally every game I've made ever. 
But yes.
Update it.
Or I'll grisha5 you.

[Orange Wizard]

>Step over person, continue looking for the captain. Check if I have any means of contacting him wirelessly.

[6] You thought you had a radio, but it has mysteriously vanished. Maybe it's fallen down somewhere?

Bleargh! I can't make explosions with lasers!

Whip out some explosives out of nowhere.

[0] You give yourself a hernia.

Holy shit! Ninja smokebomb and backstibings!

[1] I don't know what a backstibing is, but it certainly hurts. You collapse in pain.

Realising this isn't the cargo bay, and I might've pissed off my savior(heh) I mop up my mess.

"Sorry about that, mate. I thought I was in the cargo bay."

[5] You mop up the mess with your shirt, and then realise your mistake.

Um...
Ask Joe where home is?

[5] Joe tells you that home is where the heart is!

runs away from lyeos with the green goo, horrified

[9] You run around in circles screaming "AAIIIIIIIEEE!!!"

Be like *-.-
Show him around the ship.

[5] You show him to the bathroom and Very Subtly^TM indicate the toilets.

FIND SPACE LINK. TAKE SPACE LINK TO SPACE FORBIDDEN FORTRESS.

[12] You find a space link to a forbidden fortress!
[10 vs 5] It was forbidden for a good reason! You are attacked by grues, but you drive them back.

>Do my action that got, like, totally skipped, man.

[8] You have another look for your radio. You find it, a bit dusty, but otherwise functional. Apparently it was stuck at the bottom of this post.

[Lyeos]

"Goddamn it, Joe! Just take us to a bar or something!"
Insufferable machine.
Trip the person running around.

[Nidilap]

Now being shirtless (and gorgeous while at it  ),

"Where are the babes? Where are we flying now?"

Explore lemon ship.

[Yoink]

Radio ze captain! Ask him whether he's managed to accomplish anything in my absence. Yeah, right.
Then go find him, preferably before any crewmembers decide to do painful things to me.
Blast them with my laser-blunderbuss if they do.

[LordSlowpoke]

SUDDENLY RUINED STATION APPEARS

SLAMS INTO FORTRESS

WITH HIP THRUSTING TAX COLLECTOR AT HELM

[Spinal_Taper]

GO GET TALKY RED BOAT

DEFEAT EVIL

[BadLemonsXI]

Set Joe on a course for a bar. Watch the tax collector who appears for be having a hallucination fit hip thrusting while rolling around on the ground on the ruined station.

[blazing glory]

No I don't.

[Orange Wizard]

"Goddamn it, Joe! Just take us to a bar or something!"
Insufferable machine.
Trip the person running around.

[7] Joe plots a course to the nearest gay bar!
[12 vs 3] You slide a foot out and send cupkate flying.

Now being shirtless (and gorgeous while at it  ),

"Where are the babes? Where are we flying now?"

Explore lemon ship.

[6] The only babe on board is currently lying in a pool of green goo, wailing incoherently. The ship is flying to The Rod of Lordly Might, a gay bar.
[2] You wander around the bathroom for a little bit.

Radio ze captain! Ask him whether he's managed to accomplish anything in my absence. Yeah, right.
Then go find him, preferably before any crewmembers decide to do painful things to me.
Blast them with my laser-blunderbuss if they do.

• You wave the radio around in the air while chanting an eldritch invocation.
• [9] You make your way back to the captain. He achieved a hernia in your absence.
  
  

  [/q]

SUDDENLY RUINED STATION APPEARS

SLAMS INTO FORTRESS

WITH HIP THRUSTING TAX COLLECTOR AT HELM

[11] The space station wreckage collides with the forbidden fortress with a gentle thump! Hip thrusting is not an effective way of reaching a good ramming speed, despite the innuendo.

GO GET TALKY RED BOAT

DEFEAT EVIL

[5] You retrieve a toy boat from your back pocket.
[]

• You become the Lich King!

• [/q]

Set Joe on a course for a bar. Watch the tax collector who appears for be having a hallucination fit hip thrusting while rolling around on the ground on the ruined station.

[2] Joe is way ahead of you.
[8] You giggle as the tax collector drifts past.

No I don't.

[11] You cure your hernia by sheer force of will!


[-infinity] I clicked something and the formatting of this post was screwed up and I can't be arsed fixing it.

[Nidilap]

Help out wailing green goo gal.

"You okay?"