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Author Topic: roll to dodge time  (Read 5992 times)

TamerVirus

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Re: roll to dodge time
« Reply #15 on: July 10, 2014, 02:16:58 pm »

Go forward 2 years and kidnap Einstein, replacing him with a volleyball wearing a wacky wig
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Lyeos

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Re: roll to dodge time
« Reply #16 on: July 10, 2014, 02:21:13 pm »

Steal the best pancakes to ever be made - and EAT them.
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Beirus

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Re: roll to dodge time
« Reply #17 on: July 10, 2014, 02:27:54 pm »

Tame the wild time machine as if it were a horse.
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Worldmaster27

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Re: roll to dodge time
« Reply #18 on: July 10, 2014, 02:34:36 pm »

Remove this game from the timeline
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Sergarr

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Re: roll to dodge time
« Reply #19 on: July 10, 2014, 02:41:10 pm »

Look for a door. Determine how big room is.
[5] You've located the door! It's in the north wall. The room's dimensions are 10x10x10 yards.
HELP COMMUNISM WIN COLD WAR
[3] You help them. The effects sadly seem to be negligible.
smash fist against time machine's control panel
[3] A smashed control panel: acquired!
Break out using tactical hitler.
[5] You've successfully used the tactical hitler on the box! Unfortunately, it seems to be impervious to tactical hitlers. Humanity of 52014 has some really advanced materials, it seems. You'd need to find another age, more receptive to time travelers.
inject 3 whole marijuanas into the bloodstream of the first goat to ever b
[5] You go back in time approximately 10 000 years and do that. The goat promptly flips it's shit and fall from the mountain, killing it. Do you feel like a hero yet?
Go forward 2 years and kidnap Einstein, replacing him with a volleyball wearing a wacky wig
[4] You try to do that, but you discover that the Einstein is guarded by time police.
[6] You replace the entire time police with volleyballs, kidnapping Einstein in the process. Unfortunately, it means that in the future, time travel will never be discovered. Also, now you have a time police car on your tail.
Steal the best pancakes to ever be made - and EAT them.
[5] Apparently these pancakes have some... substances in them.
[1] You lose your mind from eating the best pancakes ever.
Tame the wild time machine as if it were a horse.
[5] You're now riding on top of the time machine. You feel very silly.
Remove this game from the timeline
[6] Welp.

...

The timeline is now experiencing technical difficulties due to meta-game paradoxes.
« Last Edit: July 10, 2014, 02:44:32 pm by Sergarr »
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Xantalos

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Re: roll to dodge time
« Reply #20 on: July 10, 2014, 02:44:06 pm »

Exit room. Obtain large amounts of piping instantly since time doesn't exist here anymore.
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poketwo

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Re: roll to dodge time
« Reply #21 on: July 10, 2014, 02:49:21 pm »

TIME TRAVEL 30,000 YEARS INTO THE FUTURE TO GET TECHNOLOGY FOR COMMUNISM
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Lyeos

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Re: roll to dodge time
« Reply #22 on: July 10, 2014, 02:50:27 pm »

Look for my mind - is it under my bed?
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IcyTea31

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Re: roll to dodge time
« Reply #23 on: July 10, 2014, 02:51:52 pm »

Call the Guardians of Forever and ask them to fix the timeline and preferably stop it from being messed again. Put their number on speed dial if I haven't already.
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LordSlowpoke

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Re: roll to dodge time
« Reply #24 on: July 10, 2014, 02:52:32 pm »

retcon out the guardians
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Worldmaster27

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Re: roll to dodge time
« Reply #25 on: July 10, 2014, 02:54:26 pm »

Take advantage of the confusion caused by the meta-game paradoxes to steal some time nukes.
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Sergarr

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Re: roll to dodge time
« Reply #26 on: July 10, 2014, 03:04:29 pm »

Exit room. Obtain large amounts of piping instantly since time doesn't exist here anymore.
[2] You cannot exit the room because your future self blocks the door.
TIME TRAVEL 30,000 YEARS INTO THE FUTURE TO GET TECHNOLOGY FOR COMMUNISM
[3] The pieces on technology you manage to steal are incomprehensible to your. Also, they don't seem to work outside their natural environment.
Look for my mind - is it under my bed?
[6] Yes. Yes it is.
New item acquired - your mind! Don't lose it again.
Call the Guardians of Forever and ask them to fix the timeline and preferably stop it from being messed again. Put their number on speed dial if I haven't already.
[2] It appears that your time period has not yet developed the technology of time phone calls. Whoops.
retcon out the guardians
[4] You do that. They create an ontological paradox and continue to exist.
Take advantage of the confusion caused by the meta-game paradoxes to steal some time nukes.
[6] You steal ALL the time nukes. Including those who were 0.0001 seconds away from exploding.

You die in all point of your life simultaneously. The timeline now experiences serious technical difficulties. Respawn?
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LordSlowpoke

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Re: roll to dodge time
« Reply #27 on: July 10, 2014, 03:05:00 pm »

retcon out the concept of a paradox
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Lyeos

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Re: roll to dodge time
« Reply #28 on: July 10, 2014, 03:05:47 pm »

Use my mind as duct tape to "fix" the timeline.
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Xantalos

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Re: roll to dodge time
« Reply #29 on: July 10, 2014, 03:08:39 pm »

Yo future self, get out ma way. I'm enacting our evil plan.
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Sig! Onol
Quote from: BFEL
XANTALOS, THE KARATEBOMINATION
Quote from: Toaster
((The Xantalos Die: [1, 1, 1, 6, 6, 6]))
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