Well, you pretty much have to explain why you think it's a harmful situation, express your desire to help however you can, and let them make their own choices. Be honest, and leave them to it.
EDIT: And if you do think manipulating them is the right way to go, I don't think you're going to find many people around here willing (or able, for that matter) to help without a better explanation of what's going on. Shit's very context-dependent.
Okay, so you're saying I should just be patient and wait for the situation to resolve itself? ( I have already talked to the person about the issue. In fact, I've talked to her many times.)
True. And for the most part I don't think manipulation is the way to go. Again, they don't pose an immediate threat to themself ( or she doesn't anyway, I can't speak for the whole community because I don't know them all ), and in the long run it may turn out that she never chooses to pursue the path to the point of harm and I was just being paranoid. And I have been upfront with the person, and given my arguments as patient and rationally as I can. How patient and rational that
is is probably up to interpretation, but I'd hope at least enough that I'm doing more good than harm. ( I don't want to do harm at all, but sometimes actions have unintentional consequences. )
Nonetheless, there are those who support the offending ideals on less than solid and grounded reasons who by sheer numbers, vitriol, and passion are able to sway people into their not very consistent and mostly illogical points of view. And while the person I am concerned for has escaped one such group ( Satanists ), she's fallen into the grasp of another and I find that extraordinarily frustrating with the amount of time it took for her to realize Satanism is a pile of shit. ( Maybe you're all right though and I just need to wait it out, and besides at least this group seems far less bad than Satanism. )
Indeed. If they didn't want to stay, then that would be one thing, but if you're being told you're manipulative and controlling and won't give up, I guess the question is... why is this person supposed to leave their "harmful situation" in order to have their autonomy eroded by you?
Fair question. I don't
want to erode her autonomy though. I
want to find a way to convince her to leave on her own volition. If
that fails, then at very least I want to provide alternatives and try to show those as preferable options. I would
like to just slowly distance her from the group through introducing her to other groups that hold her interest more and are better to be in and by helping her find friends. However, that
is going beyond my responsibility and right to act. ( Probably anyway. ) However, I think that it may be justifiable to do so, but again it may not. That's why I'm
not doing it. That's why I am
here. My ideas are, for the most part, bad. That's why I need help coming up with good ideas that are positive influence, non-manipulative, and non-harmful. By nature, I
am manipulative. It's not a trait I'm proud of, and it's one I am trying to eradicate in myself. Especially I do not want to use manipulation on my close friend, but at the same time I am still concerned for her psychological well-being and feel a drive to act. However, if I act in the wrong way it will be far more detrimental to her psychological health than what I am hoping to help with! >.< Is there really nothing I can do but wait?