I found these two glorious quotes and decided that they had to be shared (they are from the sufficient velocity forums if you are wondering):
The imperium is a man hanging on a ledge with one hand. He could use the other hand to pull up, or at least hold on a while longer, but he is too busy giving the middle finger to everyone else.
and the other one:
It's Christmas Morning. There is a stocking tacked to the mantle of your fireplace. Inside the stocking is a poisonous viper.
You know this because you are 400 years old, and every time you've gotten a stocking, there has been a poisonous viper inside.
Sometimes the viper bites you and you barely survive.
Sometimes you smash the stocking on the ground without opening it, only to hear the tinkling of breaking glass, and when you opened it, a viper shot out from the shards of the glass figurines you asked for.
Sometimes you got your brother to open it, and the viper bit him instead.
Once, the viper had no fangs, and you laughed as it tried to gum you to death. Then the second viper that was hiding INSIDE the fangless viper shot out and bit you.
Once a guy showed up who was immune to viper venom, and took the viper as a pet. The viper bit everyone he loved and killed them all, then bit him repeatedly until he bled to death.
You don't trust stockings anymore. They are ALL full of vipers. If you can find no viper, it just means it is a very cleverly hidden viper.
That's what it's like to be The Imperium. There is ALWAYS a viper. Your body is scarred by viper bites. Your room is decorated with their skulls and bones. These days you just immediately hose the stocking down with your bolter and throw what's left in the fire.
You're sick of vipers.
You don't even want the stocking anymore.