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Author Topic: The Forgotten Art: Approaching the Nexus  (Read 266922 times)

Pancaek

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Re: The Forgotten Art: 101 Uses For Potatoes and Vortexes Thereof
« Reply #1485 on: May 06, 2014, 04:41:58 pm »

"Sure thing, talk to you later, Lee."

Let mister Lee go to bed. Take a walk around the neighbourhood and get some chow, all those clickety-clakety-vortexes have made me hungry
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Parisbre56

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Re: The Forgotten Art: 101 Uses For Potatoes and Vortexes Thereof
« Reply #1486 on: May 06, 2014, 05:31:50 pm »

"Oh... OK then. I'd offer you a book to read or to watch some TV so that you could relax, but both my TV and my bookcase were destroyed earlier and..." And this place is in worse condition than I remembered.

Do I have enough money to go stay at a hotel for the night?
Is the toilet usable?
If not, it might be a good idea to find some place to spend the night.
Better to have at least some sanitation. Wouldn't want to have to run to a convenience store or something to use their toilet.

Harry Baldman

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Re: The Forgotten Art: 101 Uses For Potatoes and Vortexes Thereof
« Reply #1487 on: May 06, 2014, 11:45:49 pm »

What time is it?

4 o' clock in the afternoon, same as before.

Do I have enough money to go stay at a hotel for the night?
Is the toilet usable?


Yes to the first question, probably a no to the second. Well, there still technically is a hole in the ground with remains of a jagged metal pipe around it where the toilet used to be, but that's a slightly medieval definition of usability, is it not?
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lawastooshort

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Re: The Forgotten Art: 101 Uses For Potatoes and Vortexes Thereof
« Reply #1488 on: May 07, 2014, 05:39:51 am »

”Yes, O God, I am most definitely willing! I shall do what is necessary to master the True Path! I shall devote myself wholly and humbly to the Potato!”

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Harry Baldman

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Re: The Forgotten Art: 101 Uses For Potatoes and Vortexes Thereof
« Reply #1489 on: May 07, 2014, 07:39:43 am »

”Yes, O God, I am most definitely willing! I shall do what is necessary to master the True Path! I shall devote myself wholly and humbly to the Potato!”

"Splendid. Do you forswear any allegiance to the ones you have been blessed by in favor of me? If so, state your most pressing need and it shall be granted, along with a quest and a blessing."
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Parisbre56

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Re: The Forgotten Art: 101 Uses For Potatoes and Vortexes Thereof
« Reply #1490 on: May 07, 2014, 07:40:06 am »

Do I have enough money to go stay at a hotel for the night?
Is the toilet usable?


Yes to the first question, probably a no to the second. Well, there still technically is a hole in the ground with remains of a jagged metal pipe around it where the toilet used to be, but that's a slightly medieval definition of usability, is it not?
Indeed it is. We are not savages. We are powerful wizards and require to be treated as Such.

EDIT: Oh, and the tea, empty that and leave the cup on the sink to wash later. And turn off the heating if this apartment has individual heating.
Pack some clothes and other necessities for me and Lois (maybe some food too, if I can carry it/fit it in the bag) and make our way to a hotel.


"Come on, choose some clothes and let's get out of here. This place is in a state far worse than I had realised.
We can stay at a hotel for tonight and see about fixing this place tomorrow."

Hopefully the cardboard will be enough to keep any animals or light rain from getting in, at least.

Spoiler: Char Sheet (click to show/hide)
« Last Edit: May 07, 2014, 08:14:34 am by Parisbre56 »
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Toaster

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Re: The Forgotten Art: 101 Uses For Potatoes and Vortexes Thereof
« Reply #1491 on: May 07, 2014, 07:56:21 am »

Hmm... awfully early to call it a night.  Probably should go home and look for more spells of infinite power.


Go home.  Prepare self to study the book.
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HMR stands for Hazardous Materials Requisition, not Horrible Massive Ruination, though I can understand how one could get confused.
God help us if we have to agree on pizza toppings at some point. There will be no survivors.

lawastooshort

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Re: The Forgotten Art: 101 Uses For Potatoes and Vortexes Thereof
« Reply #1492 on: May 07, 2014, 08:47:16 am »

"Splendid. Do you forswear any allegiance to the ones you have been blessed by in favor of me? If so, state your most pressing need and it shall be granted, along with a quest and a blessing."

Oh god, do I go for magical power, or shall I go for the money we need, or shall I go for success with the hot pink writing girl?

I JUST DON’T KNOW
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The Froggy Ninja

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Re: The Forgotten Art: 101 Uses For Potatoes and Vortexes Thereof
« Reply #1493 on: May 07, 2014, 09:41:34 am »

I cast Engulf in Enchanted Angel Ghosts.

Harry Baldman

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Re: The Forgotten Art: 101 Uses For Potatoes and Vortexes Thereof
« Reply #1494 on: May 07, 2014, 10:03:13 am »

I cast Engulf in Enchanted Angel Ghosts.

On what?
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lawastooshort

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Re: The Forgotten Art: 101 Uses For Potatoes and Vortexes Thereof
« Reply #1495 on: May 07, 2014, 10:10:16 am »

"Splendid. Do you forswear any allegiance to the ones you have been blessed by in favor of me? If so, state your most pressing need and it shall be granted, along with a quest and a blessing."

For a few brief milliseconds, Halesey wonders if his is actually God speaking to him, or merely the Potato God. But then something in his mind tells him that such wondering is very probably heretical, not to mention punishable, and that in any case the Ultimate Power of the Potato unavoidably infers that the Potato God is the One True God in any case. This reassures him, to the extent that he could feel unassured whilst being bathed in the pure power of the tuber.

”O God, yes. Yes I do. I forswear any allegiance to anyone in favour of your tuberous blessing.  I will humbly accept your quest. My most pressing need…”

His heart yearned for the love of the woman he’d met earlier, who spoke in a fetching shade of pink that his loins and heart together could not ignore – yet deep within himself Halesey knew that a love not earned was a love not worth holding; blind devotion being for minions, not for a shared life.

His mind was itching for the hundred thousand Eurodollars that he and Larry needed to appease their overweight mentor, which would also help to pull Larry towards the force of the One True Path of the Tuber, but at the back of his mind he had begun to believe that perhaps he wouldn’t need this mentor if he had found the True Path; and if the fat man turned out to oppose the Path, it would be imbecilic to allow him to strengthen himself with the feng shui of the undeniable ley line.

It was lucky then, that Halesey’s heart and mind pulled together as one, denying their yearnings, and pulled together towards his soul, which had but one desire.

”My most pressing need is surely, O Potato Deity, greater control over the Force of the Tuber! And by that I mean surer control, or even just a wider variety of control! I mean to cast the unbeliever into a spiral of potatoes, and to blast them with the Potato of Doom! Truly, I despair when I attempt to wield the Power, and naught but a baby dribble spurts forth: it lets those who do not follow the True Path rejoice. And I have but vortexes of potatoes to wield – and although terrifying and destructive, surely it is not fitting for all who suffer them to be cast unto this potato wonderland?”

Halesey felt that perhaps he was beginning to waffle.

”So, O God of the Tuber, please grant unto me a further tuberous power, and greater control over yon power!”

He thought for a second.

”If I may be so bold.”

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Nunzillor

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Re: The Forgotten Art: 101 Uses For Potatoes and Vortexes Thereof
« Reply #1496 on: May 07, 2014, 11:14:52 am »

Excellent choice!
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Toaster

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Re: The Forgotten Art: 101 Uses For Potatoes and Vortexes Thereof
« Reply #1498 on: May 07, 2014, 12:51:45 pm »

At the darkness.
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HMR stands for Hazardous Materials Requisition, not Horrible Massive Ruination, though I can understand how one could get confused.
God help us if we have to agree on pizza toppings at some point. There will be no survivors.

Harry Baldman

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Re: The Forgotten Art: 101 Uses For Potatoes and Vortexes Thereof
« Reply #1499 on: May 09, 2014, 09:53:10 am »

John, after bidding Mr. Lee goodnight, realizes that he can't possibly be expected to sleep now - he's all full of magic and whatnot, with as much energy in his bones to sustain five men! No, what he needs right now is chow. And there's no chow like Chow's Chow - says so right on the front window, it does, John notices in his walk around the quiet streets of the Lower Esplanade. Open 24 hours a day, seven days a week, Chow's Chow is the perfect destination for the uncompromising, not particularly discriminatory munchies-stricken man in the middle of the night. In fact, John thinks that the munchies are basically the only reason people dare venture into Chow's Chow most of the time. Happy that the rather greasy establishment has finally proven of some use, John steps through the front door, allowing a few flies sweet, precious escape and causing semi-fresh air to vent into the building at last.

Chow, predictably, stands in the very middle of Chow's Chow, looking exhausted and on the verge of nodding off as always. As soon as he notices John, which happens to be right about the moment John begins to consider slapping him across the face to ensure that the man is actually awake, he seems to freshen up immediately, that classic Chow passion that drove an unassuming man from the old projects to open up a business in the nineties that now spans a grand three outlets in low-income areas illuminating his face with an eerie emotional light.

"Welcome to Chow's Chow! What can I interest you in, sir?" Chow asks, the sleep seeping out of his voice progressively. "Let me guess. Chow?"

John nods.

"Then some of Chow's chow you shall have," Chow says, and snaps his fingers. Almost instantly, a waiter, looking just a little less exhausted than Chow himself, appears at his side, a large, steaming bowl of very oily noodles mixed with delicious-looking minced mystery meat in his hand. "This delicious chow, made lovingly by the hands of no less than three different master chefs, can be yours for the price of two dollars."

John guesses that's a reasonable price for a bowl of oily noodles that size, and pays up, and the waiter then pushes the bowl of chow into John's hands, dispensing with the verbal formalities at such a speed that John can't even begin to make out what he might have said, then running off, presumably to attend to his meth lab in the back room. Having gotten what he wanted, John sits at a nearby grubby table and chows down on Chow's chow, finding it to be slightly oilier than it appears. Still, it's technically food, and John feels a bit more fed and only a little bit disgusted with himself when he's done with it.

* * * * *

Eta, deeming the apartment unfit for habitation, chooses to abandon ship rather than face the humiliation of no indoor plumbing. The process of packing up is quite swift - taking a few changes of clothes for herself (Lois, for her part, seems to have a slightly different build and frame than Eta, and she's a little shorter as well, not to mention somewhat leery of wearing someone else's clothes when her own were pretty much created a few hours ago), a few oranges to stave off scurvy on the long exodus and a few other things, she prepares a survival duffel bag, and sets out to find a hotel after making sure all the holes in her apartment are taped shut and that any water coming out of her busted plumbing is safely diverted to the apartment below hers, where nobody important is known to live.

Fortunately, there is a very suitable-looking hotel located not very far off - a place called Allie's that's located inside a very solid, very well-kept house from the mid-20th century - a postmodern affair architecturally, with the facade very obviously made shiny, gaudy and evocative of an 18th century house to the smallest of details while, as Eta and Lois find out when they step in, housing a reasonably modern building behind it. The reception desk features a very thin man in his fifties with extremely bushy eyebrows and with a slightly Middle Eastern look to him, reading what appears to be an old sports magazine - he immediately notices the ladies approach and looks up at them, leaning on the desk in a bit of forced nonchalance.

"Hey! Hello! Can I... help you somehow?" he says somewhat weakly.

* * * * *

Larry, having successfully resisted the allure of Tom's delicious pancakes, slinks back home through the city streets, finding his apartment and sliding in through the door, making sure to lock it very safely behind him. Tiptoeing through the corridor and into his bedroom, he sits down on his bed and casts a look around. Nobody appears to be watching, so he closes his eyes and, as he sometimes does on lonely nights, thinks about how totally cool magic is.

In fact, the longer he thinks about it, the cooler it seems to get. Yes, quite. And he does believe that if he does magic enough, he may eventually obtain a kickass beard as well. Magic, already powerfully tempting, begins to seem quite irresistible now.

* * * * *

Dave, preferring the embrace of ghostly angels to that of salty dentures, tries to engulf himself in them!

[Dave's affinity roll: 4-1]

On his palm a cold, yet holy light begins to brightly burn, and a set of three different faces soon appears on it, disturbing Dave quite immensely with its obvious inhuman qualities. Curious, the faces lean forward, and it becomes apparent that they all belong to the same creature - a spectral cube of some kind, with hundreds of fingers protruding out of the edges, reaching out to Dave. Dave starts to squirm, and continues to do so for a few moments before it becomes apparent that the ghost appears to be giving him a hug, though the icy chill of death from the ghost's touch is far from encouraging to Dave.

[Dave's body roll: 1-->4-1]

In fact, he begins to feel incredibly cold all of a sudden. Cold, tired and... well, 'ready' would be a good word for it, he supposes. Ready to skip town for good, to go seek greener pastures in the world beyond this one. It's a deeply disturbing feeling, actually.

* * * * *

As Halesey floats in the void, he needs not think twice about this offer - what heretic could possibly refuse it? The very thought is appalling.

"O God, yes. Yes I do. I forswear any allegiance to anyone in favour of your tuberous blessing.  I will humbly accept your quest. My most pressing need…" he says, and then thinks about what one should wish for when facing the One True God - love? That wouldn't work, or be particularly desirable without effort. Money? Liable to be misspent, and it invites manipulation. That leaves only one thing, the desire of the soul itself.

"My most pressing need is surely, O Potato Deity, greater control over the Force of the Tuber! And by that I mean surer control, or even just a wider variety of control! I mean to cast the unbeliever into a spiral of potatoes, and to blast them with the Potato of Doom! Truly, I despair when I attempt to wield the Power, and naught but a baby dribble spurts forth: it lets those who do not follow the True Path rejoice. And I have but vortexes of potatoes to wield – and although terrifying and destructive, surely it is not fitting for all who suffer them to be cast unto this potato wonderland?" he speaks to the divine entity. "So, O God of the Tuber, please grant unto me a further tuberous power, and greater control over yon power!" he continues, then pauses. "If I may be so bold."

A moment passes in silence before the planetato, the One True God, radiant in its earthiness, begins to reply, its voice extremely pleased from the sound of it.

"You have chosen well, pilgrim! You have understood a thing that the other one did not - the primacy of the potato over all! Tread this path, and all shall fall into place."

Staring at the visage of God, Halesey feels it reach out to him in an unseen manner - the root of creation, screaming through the void and plunging into his being, causing waves of mixed pain and bliss to course through Halesey's confused mind. After stirring up the depths of Halesey's soul, the root withdraws, leaving a small, almost imperceptible divine presence within the new disciple of the holy potato. Every few moments, it seems to stir, and Halesey's body twitches along with it, feeling closer to the way of the tuber than ever before.

Halesey has gained a new stat point, and the ability to choose potatoes as an element (nothing else, however)! In addition, his increasingly potato-saturated soul grants him a +1 on potato-related affinity rolls! He is also no longer affected by the potato vortex unless he permits it!

Halesey gets but a few seconds of respite before God speaks to him once more.

"You are now an acolyte of the potato - with service, the power within you will grow. And speaking of service, there is the matter of your first true quest! You must obtain the blessing of a demon, to complement the one you already have. Do so, and you will have taken a significant step toward becoming a full priest of the tuber! Do you have any further questions?"
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