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AngelxAlistair (Toy ship ahoy!)

2 (8.7%)

RichardxCyrielle (Yes, she's a side character. No, that does not make this any less cute.)

0 (0%)

MariaxSelinaxYurixNuriel (HAREM)

5 (21.7%)

RichardxCamille (The only couple who knew each other for longer than two months. Woo~)

1 (4.3%)

AshleyxConnyxNurielxBismuth (OPPOSING HAREM)

1 (4.3%)

LylexEveryone (An Uke and five Semes. Go figure.)

2 (8.7%)

AlistairxCatherine (Minako, eat your heart out.)

0 (0%)

MariaxSelina (The original, accept no substitutes.)

1 (4.3%)

LyleXRichard (Too much yuri, not enough yaoi.)

1 (4.3%)

IzzyxLucas (Because a normal tsundere is not enough.)

1 (4.3%)

WillxStella (*insert witty tagline here*)

2 (8.7%)

MariexEveryone (Marie, duh.)

2 (8.7%)

AshleyXRichard (Screw retcons, I want my OTP now!)

1 (4.3%)

MariaxMattxSelina (The original OT3. And who was Matt again?)

2 (8.7%)

Richard/CyriellexFourth Wall (Who didn't see this coming?)

2 (8.7%)

Total Members Voted: 23

[PrivateNomad]

Is that not scary

[kj1225]

Not really.

[USEC_OFFICER]

Honestly I started giggling immaturely when I saw the wiggle of the crotch-plate. Sorry.

[Twi]

Meh.

[Empiricist]

If Pandora's box has been yet to be defined, then can it please be defined as being "filled entirely with sentient razor blades that have a taste for eyes and genital skin"?

Or containing a cat with a 50% chance of being dead and a 50% change of being alive with it being impossible to determine without opening the box?

Or alternatively, containing a cat made entirely out of a swarm sentient razor blades that have a taste for eyes and genital skin (the blades, not the cat) with a 50% chance of being dead from smothering and a 50% change of being alive with it being impossible to determine without opening the box? With the box locked from the inside and thus impossible for the cat to have been killed without opening the box and impossible to have locked the box from the outside?

[Atnegam]

Spoiler: Fixed (click to show/hide)

So not only is it a 4/4 for 4, but it essentially can be thrown out as an attacker and depending on if blockers where assigned to it or not you can just remove all counters on it after declare blockers step and have it hit for 16 damage. Sure, it just eats a removal but still holy shit that't terrifying. Hell, Path to Exile technically can't hit it since it isn't a creature, just an artifact that has the ability to attack. It also is colorless so there is little reason for most aggro decks to not play this as a 4 of.

...Alright, I'm done criticizing cards that were made for fun...

[Empiricist]

Time for a random lore dump on Elpis!
A young lady in her early twenties, she has an odd translucency to her form as if an incomplete illusion she possesses feline features in the form of a pair of cat ears and a tail in the same hues as her hair. Her pale silver, almost pure-white hair is tied in a pony-tails just slightly off to the left, a small silk top hat of the color of the darkest nights is worn, angled to the right as it rests upon the feline ear situated there, obscuring it and adding to the asymmetry. Upon the a simple necklace string of titanium that she perpetually wears, there is a stylized pithos, adorned with a central square gem the same shade of vivid azure as her eyes. The rest of her fashion sense varies significantly. Generally, she is a horrible chef, though she is able to cook cheeseburgers, her favorite food, rather well.
The pithos is in actuality an anomaly, it is the current form of Pandora's box with its dimensions and mass distorted as to allow it to be worn, in actuality the space held within it is equal to that of the volume enclosed by a coffin. Locked from the inside with an embargo lock crafted by the Grim Reaper itself, ensuring that upon its use, the tomb of a box could never be escaped unless unlocked from the inside and preventing anything from perturbing its contents. Resting within it, Elpis' corpse lies. Killed. Asphyxiated. She is the only one inside the box yet she did not kill herself and there is nothing inside the box that could have killed her. Hence, what killed her must have then been removed from the box yet in order for that to have happened, the lock must have been undone and left as such. Yet it remains locked and the coffin sealed. Yet she also remains alive within the box, coexisting with her corpse, for until the box is opened, neither possibility may reign. Until the box is opened she is both dead and alive. Only when that box is open, are contents its contents decided. Yet if that may only be unsealed from the inside... and Elpis is unwilling to in life and unable to in death, then it shall never open. Thus this phylactery remains an eternal jewel, projecting a representation of the 50% chance of life, one manifested from the sadistic razors of suffering and held in the form of one filled with hope.
Elpis = LOL Cats + Schrodinger's Cat + Pandora's Box + Lich + Closed-Room Murder + HMRC Diplomacy + Obligatory Anthropomorphism

[Sanure]

Totally in florida right now using Rv camp's Wifi. Yes Akroma, more plot soon.

[kj1225]

Hey Elf, Kyle got a crit on making his suit fly like ironman's.

[IamanElfCollaborator]

Hey Elf, Kyle got a crit on making his suit fly like ironman's.

Well then it does.

[Akroma]

Spoiler: Fixed (click to show/hide)

So not only is it a 4/4 for 4, but it essentially can be thrown out as an attacker and depending on if blockers where assigned to it or not you can just remove all counters on it after declare blockers step and have it hit for 16 damage. Sure, it just eats a removal but still holy shit that't terrifying. Hell, Path to Exile technically can't hit it since it isn't a creature, just an artifact that has the ability to attack. It also is colorless so there is little reason for most aggro decks to not play this as a 4 of.

...Alright, I'm done criticizing cards that were made for fun...

ICARUS essentialy 2-shotted a god, she is plenty terrifying. Also oh god, the formalities are all wrong. It's not atrifact - robot girl, it's simply Artifact creature. Also, even a 0/0 has to have the 0/0 in the corner. And what Atnegam said, ICARUS should cost like 7 at least

[Empiricist]

So @Elf, is lore on quantum murder lich lolcat razor Elpis approved?

[IamanElfCollaborator]

So @Elf, is lore on quantum murder lich lolcat razor Elpis approved?

Hilarious but nope.

[Empiricist]

Aww... what about Pandora's quantum box? Or the sentient razor blades that have a taste for eyes and genital skin?

[IamanElfCollaborator]

Nope. I'll save those for something else.