Okay, I finally sat down with the Manual and read it. Here's my notes.
Should be a bit better now.
(ALL CAPS words are a result of me doing this in Notepad, so I couldn't really bold it.)
Page #1: I saw that image already somewhere from you. What is it? Also, it makes no sense in context, and should probably be removed.
Page #2: Mainspring? Can't say I like the name... but okay.
Stats: Don't really have a problem with them, except for maybe positioning. Having the Charisma placed before Strength just irks me a little.
Skills: Melee: I have said and will continue saying that I find the distinctions dubious and weird.
The idea itself of separating the weapons into Stabbing, Slashing, and Crushing is not bad, but I don't like the triangle. Besides, I might understand how someone fighting with clubs can perform nearly just as well with hammers. However, that someone who knows daggers will do just as well with spears is... laughable. One is a long range weapon, the other is close quarters. Same with the swords and catanas, although there it gets more complicated.
I think that instead of this, we should have the players pick several weapons to have proficiency in, say one for close quarters (fists count!), one or two for short range, and two or three for longer range. With additional proficiencies costing points from somewhere else (or choosing to put points in general proficiency). In addition, I think that some weapons like clubs shouldn't need proficiencies. Would make them usable, (what idiot would put his points into clubs?) as there's not really much to them. And if the player decides to switch weapons midgame, or gains access to a new one, he would be able to swap proficiencies between missions, representing him training with a new weapons, and the skills with his old one becoming rusty. Maybe not totally losing the proficiency.
And then Strength, Agility, AND Dexterity would ALL be used in combat with every weapon. And each weapon pairing (during a fight) would get bonuses or other advantages against each other based on the weapon types, and player's skills.
Ranged: I'm not a doca here, so I don't know if my proficiencies idea would work here as well or not. I'm just not into guns, okay?
Would be cool to have "Thrown objects" category added for using environment, throwing axes, knives, and even melee weapons, but I fear it would be a bit underpowered. Or maybe not?
The sprayers and explosives category is a bit wonky, but I can't offer any good alternatives besides "Split this up and make this useless or confusing."
Gunnery: Maybe in addition to Dexterity, make some of them require Intelligence or Perception? Either to add scores, or as a substitute.
I'd think good eyesight (ei: Perception) would be more important with cannons than Dexterity, and the Engineering (Int) is probably more important for Passive.
Also, what is the difference between planted explosives and the mine system?
Piloting: Should it really be split? If someone knows how to pilot an Airship, he probably knows how to pilot a small craft. Maybe not the other way around.
But it basicaly means that you can only really pilot one, and you have to choose your favorite craft. I don't know... I just feels like less choice in return for nothing. It's not like we're going to be multi-tasking Baloons and Airships, so the situation is quite different from swords and guns.
Maybe make it plot-related? Like... you can't pilot a baloon until you've bought and trained with one, but once you do that, you can fly it just as well?
Engineering: "Clockwork, Steam, Organic or Surface tech" Bad organisation here. Before we learn that something is incompatible with "Clockwork" we should learn what it is. It feels like hitting a brick wall. Now, mind you, Dwarf Fortress is worse, much worse. But it's not an example we want to emulate, do we?
Not much to say here. We'll see how it works out.
Medical: I feel like "First Aid," "Medical Care," and "Surgery," should be one skill, in which new points will unlock a new stage of malpractice. You won't find a surgeon who can't do First Aid. You just won't!
Cometics... what an NPC skill. If you except us to use it, it better have plot significance or go along nicely with Skullduggery.
Implants... isn't it basically surgery? Maybe once we gain an ability to do surgery we can unlock implants?
Clockwork: As I keep reading this, I increasing feel that we should be unlocking these things as we advance in clockwork tree. Fuck me, but I don't understand how someone would know how to repair a clockwork mechanism, but not know how to use it.
So we would first gain an ability to use Clockwork, then be able to make Repairs, then Modifications, and finally make our own little sexbots. Of course, it'd require more than three points in the ability, and I don't think the unlocking should be instant, but rather gradual. (Example: You can repair medium-sided clocks, and construct hand-watches.)
Doing this would also help reduce the number of skills and sub-skills, make the game more comprehensible, and make more sense. Basically, streamline it.
Steam: See Clockwork.
Surface Tech: No ability to construct or modify? Or maybe that's just epic skills. And why do I feel like Int, Perception, and Dexterity and all going to add bonuses to these.
If the idea I had before with Clockwork and Medical is to get implemented, the cost for sub-skills in Surface tech will need to get reduced, to preserve both the complexity and balance.
Fleshing: "(Depends on skill used.)" What the fuck does that mean?
Also, yes, Rearing and Caring totally DOES NOT require Dexterity as it bites your fingers off. Totally not. Or Charisma for that matter. Other than that, seems well balanced.
Speech: Oh, the dire memories of F.A.T.A.L. and having to calculate the words per minute.
On a serious note, will our Physical Appearance affect Intimidation, and things like being drunk Persuasion?
Skullduggery: Can Sabotage benefit from our knowledge of Engineering, Clockwork, etc...?
Is Deception a valid fallback if Disguide fails?
The Assasination however... oh my. Let's start, shall we?
First of all, can Disguise be used instead of stealth if you're approaching as a Servant or Personell?
How do assasinations by poison work?
For critical hits, it basically means that you must spend at least two points (Skull+Ass (he he he)) to be able to use them. And then they roll a Perception roll? They don't use their Assasination skill at all? That doesn't make any sense. And what is a critical hit like? Also, since we've already spent two points here, can we make tactical deceptions besides critical hits? Like forcing them to go into full defense giving us a chance to flee or pull out a handgun and fire? Or pull the lever. I suppose that would use the Disguise skill? Or maybe add a new "combat" Skullduggery skill?
So what are critical hits like? Do we have any control over them, or it is completely up to the whims of DM? Because it sounds like there's going to be a chance for them every combat round, but we don't get much control. Can we force a specific critical hit, even while disadvantaging ourselves? Like injuring somebody's leg, or right arm, or forcing them one step backwards into the spikes pit? Or maybe just play it safe and be... safer.
Continuing with Assasination: "If they fail, the attacker gets the chance to make an unblocked roll using their combat pool. The combat pool is rolled and it's successes counted up. Then the assassination skill is rolled. If the same or more successes are rolled with the assassination roll compared to the combat pool, then the attack is an instant kill."
I confess I DON'T understand that. So I have to hope I ROLL BAD?! The Assasination will be more successful in I AM BAD AT FIGHTING? I will just assume this is a mistake, and continue on.
Also, pardon moi if I don't believe that assasination should always be an instant kill. I don't need to explain this, do I? You can shoot somebody point-blank range, only for him to be hospitalised, and eventually recover. Besides, many different weapons can be used in assasination. Suffocating somebody with a pillow is going to take a long time.
So... Endurance rolls should always (almost always?) come into play. And an Assasination should also have different effects depending on the number of successes.
Combat Skills: Dual Wielding: Some weapons are better when dual wielding. Some are not. Dagger with Rapier for example, is a classic. Two longswords dual-wielders are found in graveyards. Are you going to enforce those distinctions in any way? I suppose those classic dual pairings could also be done with the proficiency system I proposed earlier.
Dual Wielding Ranged: No matter how many points one takes, you're not going to convince me that two pistols (or any weapon) are ever more accurate than one. Give me a single real world example of that.
Fighting Opposites: I actually like this skill. Except that I think it's use should be Perception based, and it should be possible to fail, especially with taking an advantage. And for the fact that dagger vs sword is not going anywhere no matter how good at fighting opposites you are. I say again, range should matter even in close combat. Maybe instead of a blank "Fighting Opposites" skill just have people take the skill of the other weapon? Say, an axeman with a point in swords can negate the advantages.
Page #12: Can you have a negative on either Attack or Defense? Because otherwise it doesn't make much sense to take a stance. Or maybe I'm missing something?
Page #13: Do you know what happens when two unskilled swordsmen fight? Two dead bodies. A joint suicide should be possible, especially with melee weapons, but also whenever throw weapons are involved.
How about (in melee combat) a third of the attack pool is added to the defense pool, and a third of the defense pool is added to the attack pool. And then both people roll attack vs defense.
Weapon types. Yeah, I've talked about this.
Page #14: Actually, when Dual Wielding, you NEVER attack with both weapons at once. Unless... I can't think of an example. What you do, is use one weapon, to block the opposite blade, and strike with the other weapon. I am actually not sure if dual wielding should be represented in any way during a combat. Maybe allow use of half the Defense/Attack dice for Attack/Defense? Or simply grant advantages against certain easier to block weapons.
An important note here, once again using the rapier+dagger example. The reason I am not sure if any advantages should be given to dual wielding, is because it just changes you style, it doesn't let you attack with two weapons at once like with pistols. Even if you don't have a dagger, you still use your hand very, very actively. So while having a dagger might be empirically better than a hand, I might actually say that both styles should be equal to each other. Or maybe fighting with a dagger should give advantages against "light" weapons like other rapiers, but disadvantages against "heavier" or hard to block weapons like a sword or a hammer.
Ranged Combat: I think that different weapons should have bonuses and negatived to attack and defense. Kind of hard to be in cover with a flamethrower, or with a machine gun for that matter. Easier with a pistol, or a rifle.
Tackling opponents?
Trying to predict opponents actions, and readying oneself? (If he sprints, I'm gonna shoot him! If he doesn't, I'm rolling from a reduced combat dice.)
Even if the target is unmoving, can there still be range penalties? Harder to hit a dummy from 80 meters than from 4.
Wounds: I am not sure if I like the fast acceleration of injuries. But that's something we can learn from tests, so I'll refrain from judgements.
Locations: Yeah, we need to start using bigger dice. Like a ten-sided die? Seems more acceptable here. Also, if someone is standing behind low cover, you're not gonna hit them in the legs.
Explosions and Ship Damage: Brutal. Modifiers? Like Armor, obstacles, standing behind teammates, etc... Also, we need to stand using bigger dice. Garrr.
Critical hits: Same here. Also, as a wise man once said to me, don't gut someone. You will cut their chest, and then he's going to stab you back while you're explosed. Takes a lot of time sometimes to realize you're dead. Cut his throat, it's a lot safer. Cutting throat is actually I think the best way to kill someone.
Injury Stat Effects: Yeah, not really reading that. Nothing much to say there, except for some minor things where I would complain that some types of wounds are much more common than the other, some types would be highly disadvantageous to do and would never be consiously performed, and some would have a different effect. You know, the usual. Tiruin or any other doctor would be much more helpful here.