I MUST update tonight! MUST! NOT! RUIN! PERFECT! RECORD!
Even if it ruins my REM sleep!
This is actually on time!
Get a job as a death. Assist in processing people.
[5-2] You are Death of Getting Glared At Angrily By a Giant Salamander. You chat with Death of Getting Glared At Angrily By a Giant Frog.
Become Chainsaw Eldritch God
Go adventuring with Axe Cop
[3] You find someone with an eldritch chainsaw and steal it. [5] You find Axe Cop and go on weird but somewhat awesome adventures with him.
Magic girls become more powerful the nearer to death they are dead. Everyone power up
[4] Magical Girls get another +1 each!
Distort the existence of this plain of death.
[6] You distort it.
WHY. WHY DO YOU MAKE ME CALL PARADOX.Continue recruiting people with no rhyme or reason. Seduce drunk girl. Distract Deaths with parties.
[2] No one wants to join--everyone's busy. [4+1] The drunk girl removes her clothes due to seduction. It's super effective! [1] The Deaths decide to shun you.
>Bring life and features to the plane.
[1] You die. In the Afterlife. Respawn? (Or, technically, have a you from a different universe or time wander into the area where the action is taking place, but who cares.)
Regain control over the fusion and begin consuming the deaths
[2v6+100] You become a slave to Furtakarcichlordandrandomprisonertoo.
Escape from being in boss.
Summon HatArmy. Even if I fail the first action, still summon the army.I
[1-1] You become Furtakarcichlordandrandomprisonertoo's heart. [5+2] Furtakarcichlordandrandomprisonertoo has hats for blood.
Ally all the factions onto one faction, neutral to the boss.
[4] Okay.
Geez, that was a lot of work.
BOSS TURN:
...Nothing. The boss HAS nothing to do.
Paradox shows up and [1] fixes the problems.
IF YOU WERE SKIPPED, YOU PROBABLY DIED.
No faction leader may have a faction leader bonus greater than half the number of the leader's followers.
Familiars and other weak minions always die with the faction, unless tied closely to the master.
One action per turn.
If you want to make sure your bonus is accounted for, speak up.
Infinite Featureless Plane of Death
Furtakarcichlordandrandomprisonertoo (+100)
Unharmed
Hats for Blood
Minions:
Furtaka
LEADER: HEAD DEATH (+??)
Persus13, Immortal? (-2), Missing Fingers, Death of Getting Glared At Angrily By a Giant Salamander
Death of Getting Glared At Angrily By a Giant Frog
Doomblade (+3)
Pufferfish, Hut Genus Loci
scapheap, Sailor Moon (+2); Pokemon: Pikachu
Spinal_Taper, Former Crippled Cybernetic Hermaphroditic Improper Fraction Actress/Singer/Etc, Current Drunken Guy in a Bathrobe, In Japan
Xantalos, Complete Monster Dignityless Smug Snake Clown
Agents [REDACTED], [REDACTED], [REDACTED], and [REDACTED]
Agent [REDACTED], wearing NSCP-007 (+1)
100 Animal Mascots (+1)
Atlas (+2)
Blossom (+1); Pokemon: Charmander
Bubbles (+1); Pokemon: Squirtle
Buttercup (+1); Pokemon: Bulbasaur
Cardcaptor Torika (+1); Pokemon: Porygon
134 D-Class Personnel
Dr. Bright
Dr. Clef
Dr. Gears
Former Zeus (NSCP-027) (+2)
Gyarados (+2); Pokemon: Alakazam (+2), Charizard (+2), Dragonite (+1), Snorlax (+1), Starmie (+1)
1,868,668 assorted Magical Girl fans
NPC!da_nang (+1)
NPC!Xantalos (+2)
NPC!Xantalos (+2)
NPC!Xantalos (+2)
NPC!Xantalos (+2)
Random Drunk Girl
12 Research Assistants
Kitty Pride (+1); Pokemon: Ghastly
Pam Akumachi (+1); Pokemon: Caterpie
Pistachio (+1), GraveHaunter's Daughter, a twice-orphaned Froslass; Pokemon: Self, Abra
President Bush (the second)
President Lincoln
President Jackson (+1)
President Roosevelt (the first) (+2)
Sailor Mars (+1); Pokemon: Voltorb
Sailor Jupiter (+1); Pokemon: Magnetite
SCP-076-2 (+2)
SCP-105
Ursula (+3)
Zeus (+3)
NSCP-001: The Living Tower. The lich's tower inhabited by the lich's spirit. Also Site-N01
NSCP-002: The Portal Gun. Xantalos the ASHPD. Decommissioned.
NSCP-003: The Pocket Monsters. Pokeballs and -mon. Uncontained.
NSCP-004: The Magical Girls. Magical Girls. Cooperative.
NSCP-005: The Feline Warrior. Knight Tiger.
NSCP-006: The Mad Hatter. TopHat. Uncontained.
NSCP-007: The Secret Agent. Employed.
NSCP-008: The Luckless Immortal. Persus13.
NSCP-009: The Dead Walking. Liches. Uncontained.
NSCP-010: The Toroidal Portal. Two big chinks of space that wrap around to each other.
NSCP-011: The Familiar Statue. SCP-███, or a [REDACTED] Angel.
NSCP-012: The Two-Edged Scimitar. A sword which cuts back.
NSCP-013: The Deadly Wands. Death Eaters'. Uncontained.
NSCP-014: The Changing Machine. SCP-███
NSCP-015: The Eye Spiders. Spiders which control people from their eyes.
NSCP-016: The Tough Creature. A nigh-indestructible and adaptive cephalopod.
NSCP-017: The Silver Golem. Decommissioned.
NSCP-018: The Cloning Mirror.
NSCP-019: The Laser Pointer. Part of a rifle.
NSCP-020: The Titanic Being. Atlas. Uncontained.
NSCP-021: The Infinite String.
NSCP-022: The Russian Spoon. It bends people.
NSCP-023: The Living Hut. Pufferfish.
NSCP-024: The Living Armor. Corai's magical powered armor.
NSCP-025: The Electric Boggarts. A race of creatures which are made of electricity and like scaring people.
NSCP-026: The Red Man. A person who turns things red by physical contact.
NSCP-027: The Former God. "Mortal"!Zeus