I MUST update tonight! MUST! NOT! RUIN! PERFECT! RECORD!
Even if it ruins my REM sleep!
Open portal to outside of compound
Portalhop to space
Become gigantic galaxy-spanning network of Von Neumann machines like in SOTS or Spin, Axis, and that last book.
[/b]
[5-2] You breach containment, but swiftly get returned. Status updated to Eucleid.
Return home as a pokemon champion.
You return home. [2] Your mother kindly asks how your life has been, and is unimpressed.
Magic girls are still training.
[3] They learn a couple new skills.
Publish my analysis.
Sure, why not?
...What were you analyzing, again?
Respawn. Start mythological people faction. Summon greek heroes.
[1] You get killed by summoning Atlas directly over your head. Needless to say, you respawn.
Escape containment again.
Send Hatlings to attack the SCP foundation.
Summon another HatArmy.
[6] You breach containment, and flee down the path of most resistance! After all, the lesser paths are surely traps. No one would make it that eas...
NSCP-011: A statue made of what appears to be concrete. It vaguely resembles a humanoid with an oversized head, and has been spray-painted yellow. NSCP-011 appears to possess qualities similar to SCP-███, which it resembles. It is considered highly dangerous; no personnel entering NSCP-011's containment chamber are to do so in groups smaller in number than three, at least two of which must be making constant eye contact with the NSCP at all times.
Incident 011-006: During a containment breach on 2/5/██, NSCP-006 somehow breached containment not only of its own containment unit but that of NSCP-011. 006 seemed unaware of the nature of 011 and was swiftly terminated. This lead to █ injuries and a revision of the containment procedures for humanoid NSCPs.
PAP TOPHAT ON SNOUT
GENTLY.
(antagonizing you has become the best idea i have for actions nowadays)
(Invisible text? Cool!)
*reads transparent text*
Also pap LordSlowpoke on snout. HARD.
[1] LordSlowpoke smears mushy food on his own nose. [5v4] TopHat's brains form more pap to strike LordSlowpoke's face, hard.
BOSS TURN:
The Dark Lords and the Lichs pause to summon minions. [5,6+1,6,4,6,4] The Dark Lords summon a thousand orcs (okay, just 886, but "a thousand" is much more ominous), a huge swarm of Nazi Stormtroopers (about a million), a similar swarm of Imperial Stormtroopers, some [DATA EXPUNGED], Generic Minions, and twelve Death Eaters. Supplies become an issue. [4,1,6,5,2] The Lichette and Dirg summon a dozen drunken fools, which cause as much harm as good, while the other liches summon Corai, Corai, ZombieCorai, and a rampaging silver golem.
The Foundation [5] files several new NSCPs:
NSCP-011 (see above)
NSCP-012, a scimitar which cuts the user the same way said user cuts an enemy.
NSCP-013, a set of thirteen sticks with anomalous properties allowing the users to control various aspects of reality. Currently uncontained, as the sticks' current owners are unwilling to part with them.
NSCP-014, a strange device consisting of a 3*4*7 meter box with about █50 cubic meters of additional machinery attached. It can transform items somehow.
NSCP-015, a species of spider which lays eggs in sleeping peoples' eyeballs and, as it matures, replaces said eyeball and controls the host.
NSCP-016, a largely indestructible and omnicidal cephalopod showing adaptive capabilities. Compared to SCP-███. Suggestions to attempt to use NSCP-016 and SCP-███ to terminate each other upon establishing contact with the main Foundation immediately suggested.
NSCP-017, a large hostile humanoid composed of silver.
NSCP-018, a mirror which creates clones of people who look into it. Such clones can only be removed by the cloned individual. Dr. Bright forbidden contact with NSCP-018.
Attempts to utilize the unique abilities of SCP-076-2 and NSCP-007 [2+2+1v2+2] successful. NSCP-005 contained.
IF YOU WERE SKIPPED, YOU PROBABLY DIED.
No faction leader may have a faction leader bonus greater than half the number of the leader's followers.
Familiars and other weak minions always die with the faction, unless tied closely to the master.
One action per turn.
If you want to make sure your bonus is accounted for, speak up.
PERMANENT HONOR FIELD!
Lich's Collapsed Rebuilt Tower (lich is genus loci; NSCP-001, Site-N01)
Ripped Spacetime
Former Shoehorn Empire
Cheerful Cottage (Site-N02)
NSCP-001: The Living Tower. The lich's tower inhabited by the lich's spirit. Also Site-N01
NSCP-002: The Portal Gun. Xantalos the ASHPD.
NSCP-003: The Pocket Monsters. Pokeballs and -mon. Uncontained.
NSCP-004: The Magical Girls. Magical Girls. Cooperative.
NSCP-005: The Feline Warrior. Knight Tiger.
NSCP-006: The Mad Hatter. TopHat. Decommissioned.
NSCP-007: The Secret Agent. Employed.
NSCP-008: The Luckless Immortal. Persus13. Uncontained.
NSCP-009: The Dead Walking. Liches. Uncontained.
NSCP-010: The Toroidal Portal. Two big chinks of space that wrap around to each other.
NSCP-011: The Familiar Statue. SCP-███, or a [REDACTED] Angel.
NSCP-012: The Two-Edged Scimitar. A sword which cuts back.
NSCP-013: The Deadly Wands. Death Eaters'. Uncontained.
NSCP-014: The Changing Machine. SCP-███
NSCP-015: The Eye Spiders. Spiders which control people from their eyes.
NSCP-016: The Tough Creature. A nigh-indestructible and adaptive cephalopod.
NSCP-017: The Silver Golem. Uncontained.
NSCP-018: The Cloning Mirror.
da_nang, Reality-Supporting Dragon from Space (+4 to avoid dying)
Doomblade, Godlike (+3)
Empiricist, Nothinghas Embodiment of YAFB-I (-1; in Narnia)
freeformschooler, Morris Broadband
Furtaka; Pokemon: Arceus (kinda; +3)
Persus13, Immortal? (-2); Pokemon: Alakazam (+2), Charizard (+2), Dragonite (+1), Gyarados (+2), Snorlax (+1), Starmie (+1)
Pufferfish, In Pokeland
Knight Tiger (+2)
Healing Factor Cartoonland Time Man
Minor Barrier (-1 to attackers)
Leader: scapheap, Sailor Moon (+2 from faction); Pokemon: Pikachu
Blossom; Pokemon: Charmander
Bubbles; Pokemon: Squirtle
Buttercup; Pokemon: Bulbasaur
Cardcaptor Torika; Pokemon: Porygon
Pam Akumachi; Pokemon: Caterpie
Kitty Pride; Pokemon: Ghastly
Pistachio, GraveHaunter's Daughter, a twice-orphaned Froslass; Pokemon: Self, Abra
Sailor Mars; Pokemon: Voltorb
Sailor Jupiter; Pokemon: Magnetite
Spinal_Taper, Former Crippled Cybernetic Hermaphroditic Improper Fraction Actress/Singer/Etc, Current Guy in a Bathrobe, In Japan
Leader: Lichette (+5, +2 from faction)
Dirg
Embodiment of Magic
Lich (+3)
TowerLich
Minions:
Corai
Corai
ZombieCorai
Leader: Sauron, Badly Wounded (+4, -1 from Wounds, +2 from Faction)
Lieutenant: Hitler (+1 from Faction)
Darth Vader (+2)
Ned Flanders
The Master (+3)
Voldemort (+2)
Minions:
12 Death Eaters
█████s
500 Generic Minions
886 Orcs
2 Million Stormtroopers, Assorted
Dr. Bright
Dr. Clef
Dr. Gears
Agents [REDACTED], [REDACTED], [REDACTED], and [REDACTED]
12 Research Assistants
SCP-076-2 (+2)
SCP-105
Agent [REDACTED], wearing NSCP-007 (+1)
25 D-Class Personnel
TopHat (+2 to Summoning Hatlings)
100 Hatlings
Xantalos, Aperture Science Handheld Portal Device
Atlas
Briffits/Squeans
Cut Singer
Schoolkids
Silver Golem
Six-Student Clique