I MUST update tonight! MUST! NOT! RUIN! PERFECT! RECORD!
Become The Killer Rabbit of Caerbannog
[5] You do! +1 bonus on all killing-related rolls!
Fail to get a -2 modifier.
Done. [3-1] Sadly, you get eviscerated by a goblin.
Assist Tim in purging the factionalism. Become his loveable yet dim sidekick in the process.
Sure.
Create a Team of Evil Counterparts to the Magical Girls Faction
[3] You summon Airman Sun (an evil guy with magic), a nice wolf, and a gangster with a shaved head. They are...THE MUNDANE GUYS!
RESPAWN AS KEYSTONE QUARTERMASTER
SUMMON MORE FACTION SOLDIERS
[2] No such luck.
Respawn as popcorn. Turn everything into popcorn.
[3] You are mundane, inanimate popcorn. Tasty!
Artillery magic strike on the shoes factions.
[4] Hurrah! The Shoehorn Palace has been leveled! [1+5-1] The Emperor himself is unharmed!
Proceed to repair the mecha by making it an efficient killing machine.
[4] It works! Still clunky.
Respawn as old self.
Persuade HatLeader to be my leitenant.
Persuad DestructoHats to destroy the Kops' weapons.
Summon Hatlings
[5] You again lead the Hatlings! [4] You summon DestructoHats, who wreak havoc in the Keystone Kops!
Try to convince the Brotherhood of Steel to join our faction. Gain bonus if applicable.
[5] The Brotherhood joins the faction you're in, (checks) the Sane People!
Sacrifice them to the dark gods of country.
Which them?
BOSS TURN:
The Keystone Kops, less than a third of their original strength, face the Forces of Sanity, 2,303 strong. [5v1+2] The Kops lose many, but make many more casualties!
The Shoehorn Golem strikes at the magical girls! Sadly, he has no reach weapons and the Magical Girls are flying!
The Good Dragons fly over to the Magical Girls' side, and [6+3v3+5] melt one of the Shoehorn Golem's arms! The Shoehorn Golem is weakened!
Tim [1] misses the Shoehorn Golem and hits his underling, Vorthon! Vorthon dies!
The presence of Tim, so wrong in time and space, causes a sort of crumpling in Spacetime! [4] It manifests in a fairly benign way, specifically a portal to Aperture Science. You hear a wedding.
IF YOU WERE SKIPPED, YOU PROBABLY DIED.
No faction leader may have a faction leader bonus greater than half the number of the leader's followers.
Familiars and other weak minions always die with the faction, unless tied closely to the master.
One action per turn.
Lich's Rebuilt Tower (lich is genus loci)
Crumpled Spacetime
Shoehorn Empire
Portal to Aperture Science
AND, OR, and IF/THEN reversed
Leader: Shoehorn Golem (+4, +3 from Underlings)
Spinal_Taper, Crippled Cybernetic Hermaphroditic Improper Fraction Actress/Singer/Etc
Cyber-Colonists
Some Robo-Women
da_nang, Reality-Supporting Dragon from Space (+4 to avoid dying)
Pufferfish, Embodiment of Logic Gates with Clunky Mecha
TheZoomZoll, interim Cthulhu
Leader: GreatWyrmGold, golden dragon (+3, +2 from Faction)
Lieutenants: Nighthide Dragon (black, 1/4 silver) (+1 from Faction); Stealthy Sharpmawed Stormer Serpent (half-brass-dragon Large viper) (+1 from Faction)
Dragon Turtle
18 Gold Dragons
34 Silver Dragons
23 Assorted Chromatic Dragons
Half-Green-Dragon Ogre Barbarian
Half-Bronze-Dragon Pixie Sorceror
Half-Copper-Dragon Human Cleric
Leader: Embodiment of Technology (+4)
Doomblade
Black Mage
Brotherhood of Steel (587 members)
Goblins, 972
Minor Barrier (-1 to attackers)
Leader: scapheap, Sailor Moon (+2 from faction)
Corai
Furtaka, killer bunny rabbit (+1 on Killing)
Akira
Blossom
Bubbles
Buttercup
Cardcaptor Torika
the Enchantress
Pam Akumachi
Kitty Pride
Lyrical Nanoha
Pistachio, GraveHaunter's Daughter, a twice-orphaned Froslass
Sailor Mars
Sailor Mercury
Sailor Jupiter
Leader: 1 Keystone Chief (+3, +2 from faction)
Lieutenants: 6 Keystone Lieutenants (+1 from faction)
93 Keystone Enforcers
774 Keystone Beat Cops
Leader: TopHat (+1 from faction)
Lieutenant: HatLeader (+1)
15 Elite Hatlings
[spoiler=Mundane Guys]
Airman Sun
Gangster
Wolfie
[/spooiler]