Print

Please login or register.
1 Hour 1 Day 1 Week 1 Month Forever
Login with username, password and session length

[GreatWyrmGold]

Didn't we already resign?

[Dariush]

Tell the guy looking for us that we are on a trip. Tell the visitors that there's temporarily no food. Allow them to eat each other. Surround the living quarters with tin foil to prevent them from calling for help.

[stabbymcstabstab]

Resign, don't do what Dariush said

[Gentlefish]

You resign from your post, without much hassle. It briefly hits the news. You tell everyone there is no food, but you are working on importing food.

Everyone knows agricultural workers can't be evil. Because they play with dirt. So you simply ship in the most nutritious soil you can and completely fill in the flat with it, five feet deep. You send your japanese towelgirls to slave over the thousands of seeds you have imported.

Remembering highschool, you remember that you need to have something to pollenate the plants. Prefereably something evil.

[Furtuka]

pollinate or fertilize? 

[Gentlefish]

pollinate or fertilize? 

Pollinate. the soil is plenty fertile. We need the plants to have sex.

[Furtuka]

import a large shipment of malaria infected mosquitos. Have all your employees be given experimental vaccinations against it.

[GreatWyrmGold]

import a large shipment of malaria infected mosquitos. Have all your employees be given experimental vaccinations against it.

Why? Mosquitoes feed on...ah, the males. Good idea.
Just...make sure the vaccines have at least preliminary tests done beforehand.

[Gentlefish]

You order a plethora of experiemental vaccines from the black market, and order your towel girls into groups of ten to try each one. Vaccine Gamma seems to work the best, so you make sure all of the pirates and commandos get Beta, while everyone else gets Alpha, the second-best. The towel-girls get none. You also "hire" more young japanese schoolgirls to come out and work the farm.

The Russian Mafia Leader is due soon via his own yacht.

Spoiler: Assets (click to show/hide)

1 Aircraft Carrier
20 Rouge Vets
10 Rouge Spetznaz
1 Armored Yacht
2 Derelict Battleships
5 MiGs
6 PT boats
10 Pirate Commandos
50 Pirates
150 Service Staff
200 Towel girls/ Stone Smoothers/Farm Slaves

[GreatWyrmGold]

Vaccinate the girls and Mafia guy.

[NRDL]

Research ancient occult rituals in order to extend our guy's lifespan.  If it seems dangerous, test it on the towelgirls first. 

[GreatWyrmGold]

Research ancient occult rituals in order to extend our guy's lifespan.  If it seems dangerous, test it on the towelgirls first. 

It's rude to research occult rituals instead of entertaining our guest.

[NRDL]

Invite him to participate, then.

[Geen]

Check the status of our money supply, and see if we can hire some mercenaries.

[Zanzetkuken The Great]

This cannot possibly last.