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[Rolan7]

For Halloween I went as my birth gender!
It was very convincing, and at least one person was horrified.

[Egan_BW]

The horror, the horror.

[Kagus]

I've been learning a bit of rope art this year, so I decided to make use of those skills while at the CAH-DnD gathering some friends pulled together for Saturday. Namely by strapping a box of cereal to my chest and calling my costume done.


I was a cereal ropist.

And, as such, I was required to inform those present that I was a registered Chex offender.

[Starver]

Twain held up at a whale-weigh station.

(It's funny, and not potentially a tragedy, due to a huge fluke!)

[TD1]

Dammit, I misread the title as Terraria Jokes and got excited.

[Rolan7]

What's the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

One is really heavy, the other's a little lighter

[Tomasque]

What's the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

One is really heavy, the other's a little lighter

Wait a moment... I remember seeing this one before...

What’s the difference between a hippo and a zippo?

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

One’s really heavy, the other a little lighter.

That's what I thought! Don't think you'll get away that easily, joke thief! 

[IonMatrix]

ptw

[Naturegirl1999]

What do you call a writing utensil with wings?

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

A chickpen

[Bumber]

What do you call someone who breeds tarantulas?

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

A tarancher.

[KittyTac]

I tried to carry a board game onto an airplane but the airport security stopped me and confiscated it.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

They said the Risk was too big.

[Iduno]

Known shitbag Eric Clapton's in the news again, so I guess it's that time.


I heard Conor Clapton's doing National Novel Writing Month.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Last I heard, he managed 53 stories.

[Starver]

Where did Damian Hirst buy the materials for his artwork 'The Physical Impossibility of Death in the Mind of Someone Living'?

At a Sharkuterie.

[Rolan7]

No fun wordplay in this one, just a gotcha-joke I took a while to get.

In Fallen London I started seeing references to this new food, "The Sausage About Which No One Complains".  On further inspection, "You'll never hear a word spoken against it".  Its construction required a special ingredient, mutersalt.

Mutersalt.  A spice which temporarily paralyzes the vocal chords.

As an added twist, people seem to legitimately appreciate it as a food, so there you go.

[Egan_BW]

At least it doesn't kill you.