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Author Topic: Terrible Jokes  (Read 705463 times)

hector13

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #4065 on: May 24, 2018, 01:21:25 pm »

I honestly didn't notice Jechtson until Reelya pointed out there might be other stuff.
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Look, we need to raise a psychopath who will murder God, we have no time to be spending on cooking.

the way your fingertips plant meaningless soliloquies makes me think you are the true evil among us.

Kagus

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #4066 on: May 25, 2018, 05:16:52 pm »

At the height of their power, the strictly nomadic peoples of the Golden Horde conquered a vast number of holdings that later became known as the Wholly Roamin' Empire.

hops

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #4067 on: May 25, 2018, 07:29:27 pm »

At the height of their power, the strictly nomadic peoples of the Golden Horde conquered a vast number of holdings that later became known as the Wholly Roamin' Empire.
Oh man, I'm 'prised.
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she/her. (Pronouns vary over time.) The artist formerly known as Objective/Cinder.

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Tawa

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #4068 on: May 26, 2018, 10:38:56 pm »

what did king gustav i of sweden say when someone told him a funny joke
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
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Reelya

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #4069 on: May 29, 2018, 05:19:30 am »

Why is a black Filipino like French wine?

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

AzyWng

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #4070 on: June 02, 2018, 09:45:49 am »

What do you call an Iraqi father who works at the checkout aisle in a grocery store?

Bag-dad.
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Reelya

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #4071 on: June 02, 2018, 02:24:00 pm »

Which European city to children hate the most?

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Kagus

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #4072 on: June 02, 2018, 02:34:22 pm »

Which European city to children hate the most?

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Clever. Not sure if it's a vegetable play on words, or a Belgian pedophilia joke.

pisskop

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #4073 on: June 02, 2018, 06:08:22 pm »

No that would be the Netherlands
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H4zardZ1

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #4074 on: June 03, 2018, 12:22:32 am »

Good jokes are to be appreciated,
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hector13

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #4075 on: June 03, 2018, 04:14:03 am »

Good jokes are to be appreciated,
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
It’s not a joke if someone isn’t laughing.
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Look, we need to raise a psychopath who will murder God, we have no time to be spending on cooking.

the way your fingertips plant meaningless soliloquies makes me think you are the true evil among us.

Reelya

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #4076 on: June 03, 2018, 04:29:14 am »

We don't have government joke inspectors, yet. What do you think this is, the USSR UK or something?

milo christiansen

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #4077 on: June 03, 2018, 08:54:33 am »

We don't have government joke inspectors, yet. What do you think this is, the USSR UK or something?

That is a bit too true to be funny... It's hilarious :P
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Kagus

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #4078 on: August 03, 2018, 05:30:24 am »

A white carton with the word "Leche" written on it in black text walks into a bar. The bartender says "Hey, we don't serve dairy products here!".


"No," replies the carton, "soy milk".

a1s

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #4079 on: August 06, 2018, 05:26:18 pm »

No other humans had been seen for days and then they saw an old Jewish cowboy sitting beneath a tree. The leader rushed to him and said, "We're lost and running out of food. Is there someplace ahead where we can get food?

"Vell," the old Jewish cowboy said, "I vouldn't go up dat hill und down da other side. Somevun told me you'll run into a big bacon tree."

"A bacon tree?" asked the wagon train leader.

"Yah, ah bacon tree. Trust me. For nuttin vud I lie."

The leader goes back and tells his people that if nothing else, they might be able to find food on the other side of the next ridge. "So why did he say not to go there?" some pioneers asked "Oh, you know the Jewish -- they don't eat bacon."

So the wagon train goes up the hill and down the other side. Suddenly, Indians attack and massacre everyone except the leader, who manages to escape back to the old Jewish cowboy, who's enjoying a "glassel tea." The near-dead man starts shouting. "You fool. You sent us to our deaths! We followed your instructions, but there was no bacon tree. Just hundreds of Indians, who killed everyone."

The old Jewish cowboy holds up his hand and says "Oy! vait a minute." He then gets out an English-Yiddish dictionary, and begins thumbing through it. "Gevalt, I made myself ah big mistake. It vuz not a bacon tree. It vuz a ham bush."
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I tried to play chess but two of my opponents were playing competitive checkers as a third person walked in with Game of Thrones in hand confused cause they thought this was the book club.
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