Inside the Magical Weaponry and Armor Department...James knocks on the door that stands in his way!
[Door reaction roll: 4]
Nobody answers! Probably because it leads to the outside! Oh well. James searches for an alternative exit!
[Search roll: 6]
He finds a barrel that says "To Outside" on it! Having nothing better to do, he dives right in!
[
Barrel roll: 6]
It does indeed transport him outside! By launching him upwards from a third story window! Stupid magical teleporters!
[Fall damage roll: 1]
James lands
very hard on the cobblestone outside! His shell is smashed and the pieces have pierced his delicate snail flesh!
[Will roll: 1+1]
Oh dear. James feels terribly lightheaded all of a sudden.
[Will roll: 1]
Yep. He is most definitely dying right now.
[Will roll: 5-1]
Realizing what is happening, James pulls himself together and rolls back onto his snail-foot! He feels like crap, yes, but that's no excuse for nearly dying!
In the cottage of Bernie's sister...Samucane chooses to disregard the advice of its inner self and solve this problem right here with a good dose of cane magic!
[Magic roll: 3+1]
Samucane adds canes where he previously removed them! The man is once more cane-enriched!
[Man waking up roll: 5]
The man instantly bolts upright! He begins to examine himself!
"Holy fuck, I'm not dead! Imagine that!"[Reaction roll: 1]
He looks at his newly caned tissues!
"AAGH! WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED TO MY BODY?"He begins to cast magic in a complete panic!
[Beautiful man magic roll: 3-
1]
His magic doesn't seem to work! The man keeps yelling various obscenities!
[Sis reaction roll: 3]
[Sis intimidation roll: 4]
"CALM DOWN, you idiot! Don't make me blast you with my amulet! It'll make a big mess, I assure you!"[Beautiful man reaction roll: 2+1]
The man looks at her in bafflement!
"And who the fuck are you, anyway? Did you do this to me?"[Sis reaction roll: 5]
[Sis calming roll: 4]
"Now, relax, I had nothing to do with it. I'm currently a bit immobile, as you can see. In fact, I have no idea what happened to you. Looks like long-distance magic to me."[Beautiful man reaction roll: 1+1]
"I don't fucking believe you! You had something to do with this, I know!"[Sis patience roll: 6]
[Sis mocking roll: 5]
"Oh, yes, of course I ensorcelled you to become a wooden man for some reason, then left you on the floor completely unrestrained and fully capable of eliminating me at any moment. Sounds very bloody likely, if you ask me!"[Man reaction roll: 1+2]
"Well, maybe this wasn't your plan, but I bet you had something to do with this!"[Sis patience roll: 2]
[Sis insult roll: 4]
"No, I did not, you bloody twit, are you really that dense? Honestly, I heard that you metamorphosis people were dumb as posts, but this is a whole new level I'm witnessing here!"[Man reaction roll: 2+1]
"Okay then, tell me, if you're so fucking smart: who did this?"[Sis bluff roll: 3]
"Not a clue. Probably somebody awful, though!"[Man reaction roll: 3]
"Oh, fuck this. I'll be leaving now."He goes toward the door!
[Sis bluff roll: 4]
"Look out for any highly dangerous mages that want you dead out there, will you?"[Man reaction roll: 1+1]
"Fuck you! I'm safer out there than here with you, ya crazy bitch!"
Author
Topic: Life Begins At Death - Epilogue: We Live And Live Again (Read 562429 times)