For all the gripes about set gender roles, it's a bitch to have NO role and no place in things.
One of the real travesties, is how I've noticed a lot of people relate to people who are gay, or not gender normal.... Basically the notion that more or less, we don't have a place in the world like others seem to....
I have real problems relating to people without being fake. It isn't really an option. I an the unfortunate embodiment of "living a lie." It is amazing. I try to socialize mostly with women to avoid guys looking at me odd/not being ok with the idea that I'm attracted to guys (I.E. they might think I'll hit on them even though I won't). It's amazing though, how people who inevitably find out about me deal with it.
a.) They accept it, this is exceedingly rare.
b.) They outright call me an abomination....
c.) They fake being ok with it , but really they aren't.
Basically at some point the family, friends and love interests of of the girls I hang out with eventually ask who that guy is that she hangs out with.... At some point, you basically have to tell them you're gay. The parents wonder what you're doing hanging around with their daughters. The boyfriends/husbands certainly wonder what the hell you're doing around their girlfriend/wife. I've even had female friends of the girls I hang out with accuse me of having indecent motives until they figure out just how wrong they are.
The whole point is that the roles define how others see us and how we can fit in with them. The entire notion of them just not existing at all is so very foreign, because you'd either have to deal with them or replace them with something else. The pieces, us, require a place.... It is that simple, unfortunately. Otherwise you end up with a society exiling people.