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Author Topic: You are Canada!  (Read 11563 times)

mainiac

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Re: You are Canada!
« Reply #105 on: October 11, 2012, 10:32:07 pm »

Infiltrate with our beer cavalry!  IT MAKES SENSE!!!!
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GreatWyrmGold

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Re: You are Canada!
« Reply #106 on: October 11, 2012, 11:00:12 pm »

No, Canuawine Calvary!
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Corai

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Re: You are Canada!
« Reply #107 on: October 11, 2012, 11:00:53 pm »

Bitch please, if we are infiltrating Russia we must use VODKA Calvary.
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GreatWyrmGold

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Re: You are Canada!
« Reply #108 on: October 11, 2012, 11:07:15 pm »

Details, details. This thread isn't terribly serious,
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misko27

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Re: You are Canada!
« Reply #109 on: October 11, 2012, 11:07:44 pm »

Details, details. This thread isn't terribly serious,
*gasp* You're Kidding!
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Descan

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Re: You are Canada!
« Reply #110 on: October 16, 2012, 03:18:45 pm »

India: There are some rumours of the populace being worried about Russian advances, both militarily and economic. They are one of the obvious targets of Russian energy exports.

China: Northern China being completely dominated by Russian energy markets, with anythign south of Shanghai still relying on the old energy methods.

South-East Asia: There are reports of strange creatures in the jungles of Cambodia and Indochina, but otherwise all is quiet. They are too far from Russia to be one of the first targets.

Japan: Our first Asian energy market, they are co-operating with our trade, with them getting cheap energy, and us getting first dibs and lower prices on high-end technologies.

Russia: The target of our Cold War. With a large, but rusting (in multiple ways) army, and massive corruption on every level, they are not as dangerous as they could be. But with the influx of cash and technology from their own version of Cold fusion, they are quickly making gains. Their vodka-based diet prevents much canunawine shenanigans, and our efforts to bring Russian nationals to Canada to destabalize them has resulted in Greenland becoming predominately Russian.

United Kingdom: Not much has happened on the U.K. front, but reports indicate that since we are still considered a dominion of the U.K. and thus under theoretical control of the Queen, she's... getting ideas.

Australia: Aside from being an early target of our war machine (the Pacific fleet build-up continues!), not much has happened in the Land of Oz. However, reports indicate that there is a minor build-up of arms and ammunition, and the production and mining of venom from the Australian venom mines has ramped up considerably in the last year.

Africa: Besides being a hot-bed of warlords, technology, deserts and jungles, rampant corruption and million-dollar charities, the only new things in Africa would be a mysterious pyramid found in the jungles of the Congo, far from any civilization, either ancient or modern.

Latin America: Chavez is right-angry at us for undercutting his oil profits, but not much else has happened. Brazil seems to be making moves towards forming a more federal South American Union, and most of the other countries seem to be going along with it.

Middle East: Same deal as south America, with various oil-producing countries being angry at us, and Egypt looking to create new secular caliphate of Arabic countries.

USA: Basically, our bitch. Completely reliant on us for energy and their addicton to canunawine, when we say jump, they say how high. They are the 11th province.

Europe: Besides western Europe shaking in their boots towards Russia, and eastern Europe bending down and bending over for the Ruskies, not much has changed.

Canada: Still awesome.
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Corai

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Re: You are Canada!
« Reply #111 on: October 16, 2012, 03:21:32 pm »

I still say we attack Russia with bear cavalry.
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Jacob/Lee: you have a heart made of fluffy
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Jeykab/Bee: you seem like the person who constantly has mini heart attacks because cuuuute

OREOSOME

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Re: You are Canada!
« Reply #112 on: October 16, 2012, 03:23:49 pm »

Send Military Research teams to southeast asia and The mysterious pyramids. also, have the Science division work on warm fusion, for use in non cold environments. Then, Canadian troops can use fusion weapons even in areas like Australia and Africa and stuff.
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misko27

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Re: You are Canada!
« Reply #113 on: October 16, 2012, 03:25:21 pm »

I still say we attack Russia with bear cavalry.
Russia has BIGGER BEARS STUPIDS.

What to do.
Declare Independance!
Imply that Russian Diplomat implied China's leader's mother was Ass-grazing Horse Wench.
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Corai

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Re: You are Canada!
« Reply #114 on: October 16, 2012, 03:26:56 pm »

We are Canada.

Canadian bears are better then russian bears.

Thus automatically badass.

What to do.
Declare Independance!
Imply that Russian Diplomat implied China's leader's mother was Ass-grazing Horse Wench.

Also, all this.
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Jacob/Lee: you have a heart made of fluffy
Jeykab/Bee: how the fuck do you live your daily life corai
Jeykab/Bee: you seem like the person who constantly has mini heart attacks because cuuuute

Thecard

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Re: You are Canada!
« Reply #115 on: October 16, 2012, 03:34:56 pm »

We are Canada.

Canadian bears are better then russian bears.

Thus automatically badass.
Exactly.
What to do.
Declare Independance!
Imply that Russian Diplomat implied China's leader's mother was Ass-grazing Horse Wench.
This too.
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I think the slaughter part is what made them angry.
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Those hookers aren't getting out any time soon, no matter how many fancy gadgets they have :v

Descan

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Re: You are Canada!
« Reply #116 on: October 16, 2012, 03:41:16 pm »

Our ambassador to the U.K. arranges a meeting with the Queen. Before she can say anything, he flips her off and hands her the declaration of Canada becoming entirely sovereign, with no legal method of control by the U.K.

He reports she's a little miffed.

By the same token, our ambassador to China has given the Chinese president a very convincing document that Putin thinks of them as knee-scraping peasants, good only for their money and as fodder for a way. In other words, exactly like how he thinks of Russians, and showing that he already considers China a part of Russia.

Apparently, this news makes them a little... angry. They're willing to work out a trade agreement with us, if and only if we agree to keep the Canunawine away from Chinas shores, and protect them if Russia reacts militarily.

More Russian nationals are pouring in to Greenland and other parts of Canada. We now have a good 5 million extra Russians of varying status, and Greenland in particular is chock-full. Frankly, the natives are getting a bit peeved about it.

And finally, two research teams are dispatched to Cambodia and the Congo to check out the pyramid and reports of creatures.
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Quote from: SalmonGod
Your innocent viking escapades for canadian social justice and immortality make my flagellum wiggle, too.
Quote from: Myroc
Descan confirmed for antichrist.
Quote from: LeoLeonardoIII
I wonder if any of us don't love Descan.

Corai

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Re: You are Canada!
« Reply #117 on: October 16, 2012, 03:49:35 pm »

Accept China's deal.

Remind the U.K what happened when they tried to stop America from being sovereign.
« Last Edit: October 16, 2012, 04:00:29 pm by Corai »
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Jacob/Lee: you have a heart made of fluffy
Jeykab/Bee: how the fuck do you live your daily life corai
Jeykab/Bee: you seem like the person who constantly has mini heart attacks because cuuuute

misko27

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Re: You are Canada!
« Reply #118 on: October 16, 2012, 03:52:29 pm »

Accept China's deal.

Remind the U.K what happened when they tried to stop America from being sovereign.
And that they aren't nearly as strong as they were last time.

Am slightly sad that did not end up in OOC thread, but oh well.
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Guardian G.I.

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Re: You are Canada!
« Reply #119 on: October 16, 2012, 04:09:40 pm »

Greenland full of Russian immigrants?
We have a potential separatist hotspot.
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