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[LordBucket]

Hire highschool dropouts

Offer them a decent salary.

Sounds OK. Anyone who works cheap.

Being struck with inspiration, you decide to hire some high school dropouts to do your dirty work for you. You get in your mothers car and start driving to your old high school when it occurs to you that high school dropouts probably will not be found at the high school.

So where to look? Hmm. Maybe...the local skatepark?



You debate whether to wear your Supervillain costume while you do your recruiting. If you do, it will be tipping your hand and announcing yourself to the world. It will also prevent anyone from being able to identify you. If you don't...it will be easier to blend in and disappear if anyone tries to follow you.

You toss a coin, and call it in the air. Heads. Looks like you wear the costume.

You stop at the house and put your costume in the trunk, wisely deciding to change elsewhere so as to not be seen. You park a couple minutes walk from the skatepark, and carrying your costume into the restrooms to change. And then...you make your appearance to the world.



Well, that was a bit anticlimactic. Fortunately, nobody seems to have noticed you yet.

You: "Excuse me."

(no response)

You: "HEY!"



Skaters: "...whoa, dude. What's with the outfit?"

You: "Hello, gentlemen. Ladies. I am seeking to hire some ruffians willing to be discrete, for some rather delicate work."

Skaters: "...dude, we're not gay." *laughter*

You: "No, not that kind of work. "

Skaters: "What, then? You want us to rearrange your face? *laughter* Yeah, I'd go for that."

You: "No, actually I'm looking to hire some people to rob, steal and kill for me. It's very simple, actually. I put you on a weekly salary and tell you go do things for me. Like, say...rob a bank. I tell you to go rob the bank and bring back all the money and give it to me. And next maybe the next day I'll tell you to go kill some people, so you'll do that. And maybe the next day I'll want to scare local businesses into buying into my extortion racket, so I'll have you go smash up some retail stores and spray them with graffiti. So you'd go do that. And, at the end of the week I pay you for everything you've done. How does $500/week sound? That's very good money in the present economy, and it will be under the table so no taxes paid at all."

(Dead silence)

You: "So, is that a yes? Come on...this is a good deal. $500/week under the table? That's more than most college grads are getting these days."

Skaters: "...dude...so...you want us to do stuff and you'll pay us?"

You: "Yes, exactly."

Skaters: "Like rob banks?"

You: "Well, yes. Not exclusively, of course. I do have other tasks that will need doing, but at the moment while my resources are moderately acceptable, my actual income is somewhat lacking, so having you rob banks would be very helpful."

Skaters: "...and you want us to give you the money we get from robbing the bank?"

You: "Yes, I thought we covered this already. "

Skaters: "And after we give you the money, at the end of the week you give us $500 of the money that we robbed and gave you?"

You: "Yes! That's exactly it. I'm glad we've having effective and successful communication here. So...who's in?"

Skaters: "Dude, you're a moron. Get the fuck out of here before we stick our skateboards up your ass."


Well, that didn't go so well.

What do you do?

[GreatWyrmGold]

Okay, GM, seriously. I've said it before and I'll say it again.

Real+Supervillain =/= fun. I get it, you want to be realistic. Throw us a bone, or at least a map to where the dog buried it.

[GreatWyrmGold]

Okay, maybe that was a little harsh. But the OP claims you would lean "slightly" towards the serious. This is far more than slightly. This is a full-out deconstruction of supervillainy. That makes a great story, but it's not much fun to play. Maybe if you titled this something like "Suburban Criminal," we could figure something out, but forcing us to figure out the steps between" Ooh, a ton of cash!" and "Bwahaha! You tremble, Heroic!" and forcing us to stick to the path of possibility...well, there's a reason cops don't have to deal with real-world supervillains. They don't exist for reasons we're discovering.

Pile on the realism when we're dealing with official attention, but give us the benefit of the plot while we're gathering minions, mad scientists, a base, and other elements of an evil plan, or don't call it a supervillain thing. It's not, it's a pathetic, irritated attempt at a supervillain where we are the irritated, pathetic guy.

[LordBucket]

give us the benefit of the plot

Throw us a bone, or at least a map to where the dog buried it.

The story is up to you guys. I'm just the gamemaster. I run the world. It's not my place to tell you what you're supposed to be doing or forcefeed a fixed "plot" down your throats while you choose between options A and B.

Maybe if you titled this something like "Suburban Criminal," we could figure something out, but forcing us to figure out the steps between" Ooh, a ton of cash!" and "Bwahaha! You tremble, Heroic!" and forcing us to stick to the path of possibility...well, there's a reason cops don't have to deal with real-world supervillains. They don't exist for reasons we're discovering.

Sure they do.

Hitler, Al Capone, Charles Manson, Pablo Escabar...what about Captain Killdozer?

Wach this video and tell me there are no real life supervillains and that police don't have to deal with these things. What about the North Hollywood Shootout, in which two bank robbers took out half a dozen police because their pistols couldn't penetrate their body armor? What about the guy who stole a tank? What about the Sarin gas attacks in Tokyo?

I think the problem you're having is that you're not placing yourselves into the world being presented, and instead following recipes from other games that are not this game. Look at the previous page: the prevailing vote was basically "do LCS."

This isn't LCS.

My advice would be to figure out what your goals are, and then try to find a way to make them happen.

[Wrex]

Here's the deal: They still lost. They caused mass panic, they caused loss of life. They still died like everyone else. That's not a super villain. That's a regular old mid-boss, if any at all. Furthermore, things like the Aum cult took years and massive resources to achieve. Things we will obviously need to build up over great periods of time. We are no charismatic cult leader. We are some child, with a pocketfull of money, dumping it on a pretty costume and a weapon we might theoretically be able to shoot at a stationary target at close range. We aren't just nothing, we are downright counterproductive to our own goals. And if we are stupid enough to choose a career which results in our inevitable defeat, I propose the following:

Consider suicide, you miserable wretch.

Also, I didn't literally mean "Lets get random people to die for us by giving them a book!" because that just dosen't happen. I should have been more specific. The base goal of "Don't get your hands dirty" is sound, being magicaly persuasive is not. So I blame myself for that one for not being clear enough.

EDIT: on the off chance we suceed, we can use the whole angst angle to make a ood story to belittle our minions with, so it's not completely counterproductive.

[LordBucket]

I should have been more specific.

I did ask how exactly you were going to go about it.

And then you pointed out that acting like "Casanova's developmentally disadvantaged cousin" was obviously not the answer and that you guys needed to decide what to do exactly...but then the next three posts after yours said to just go hire some drop outs. So that's what I went with.

Again...I propose you figure out your goals and try to come up with a way to accomplish them.

Throw us a bone

Corai wanted swat armor, and you had it the next day. You said to "look into some sort of base" and I gave you castles, underground missile silos, yachts and houses as options. There are a lot of things you could be doing with this...but...you need to think more. You're trying to take unreasonable shortcuts.

[Guardian G.I.]

Judging by the calm and collected discussion above, this suggestion game should be called "General Discussion Politics Thread: The Game"

also, ptw

[GreatWyrmGold]

"Benefit of the plot" is not you telling us the plot. It's finding a minion who works cheap and well, or an evil plan that works. It's all of those breaks from reality no one reading superhero comics cares about because without them, there would be no villains.

You gave us SWAT armor and a bunch of cool bases we couldn't afford and, given our current economic status (rich but unable to make money) that was a good idea.  Besides, it's not yachts, castles, or armor that makes a villain, it's the evil plots. Every step we've tried to take towards the plotting has been thwarted--for real-world reasons, sure, but that doesn't make it more fun. You know what might make it fun? Being a supervillain and not a nerd with a costume hindered by those issues with reality that prevent most multiple-time supervillains.

The difference between a "mere" big-time criminal and a supervillain might be vague, but basically a supervillain is more formidable. Shoot All Capone, he dies; shoot Dr. Doom and he gets angry. When one of the Aum cultists punches you, you get bruised; when one of the Brotherhood of Evil Mutants punches you, you're lucky if you feel it tomorrow. Toss Charles Manson or an armored bank robber in jail, and they're not going anywhere; do that with the Joker or Mr. Freeze, and the police take bets on how long they'll stay in this time. You can fight Bernie Madoff (or your hated corporate exec of choice), but not Lex Luthor.

And, again, slightly towards "serious" doesn't mean "You can't do any supervillain plots because you're a college student," it means, "Don't be an idiot, you'all get sent to jail or  die."

[GreatWyrmGold]

Alright, I'll tell you what... give me an evil idea, I'll explain why it wouldn't work

[Guardian G.I.]

(Note: On the Sliding Scale of Silliness Versus Seriousness this game is intended to lean slightly towards serious. Yes, there may be some silliness. But not You Are Russian levels of silliness. This game will take place in modern day "real world" USA. So no superpowers, no giant mechs, no aliens etc. This will largely be a game of resource management based loosely on reality.

This game will take place in modern day "real world" USA. So no superpowers, no giant mechs, no aliens etc. This will largely be a game of resource management based loosely on reality.

based loosely on reality

The following pages show that your game is actually firmly based on reality, featuring real-life online shops, and real-life prices and laws being taken into account.
Typical supervillain stories can't be too realistic though, for obvious reasons.

[Thecard]

Yeah, I don't like criticizing, but throw us a damn bone here.  I get that you're trying to be realistic, but there is no way we can be a "suburban supervillian" from where we are now.  If we got a million, sure.  If we were a super-genius, sure.  If we had any distinguishing characteristic that would be beneficial, we could maybe scrounge something out of that.  But right now, it seems to me more like you're joking.  You made fun of the lottery and the IRS, you poked at the impracticability of superhero costumes and their weapons.  You showed us lairs we could not reasonably, if possibly, afford to keep.  You're joking.

[LordBucket]

tell you what... give me an evil idea, I'll explain why it wouldn't work

Your past four posts on the page have just been complaining. If you don't want to play, that's fine. But if you're going to deliberately sabotage the thread, kindly fuck off please.

[Wrex]

It's not that there are no villanous plots we could enact, it's just that they would take decades to come to fruition, and we would need to stop spending money on random crap that will look cool but do absolutely jack all.

[LordBucket]

It's not that there are no villanous plots we could enact

need to stop spending money on random crap that will look cool but do absolutely jack all.

This.

Like I've said a couple times now, you guys would be much more successful if you'd identify goals and try to make them happen. As is, there's too much focus on the purely external "look" of supervillainy. If your goal (in real life) were to get married, you wouldn't on day one buy a wedding ring and a tuxedo as the first thing and then start approaching random strangers asking them to marry you. If your goal were to run a business, you wouldn't rent an office and start showing up at 9am without any clue whatsoever what the business was actually supposed to do.

Do you want to be a mafia don? A drug lord? A serial killer? A religious nutcase with a private estate full of mind controlled followers? All of these things fall perfectly well into the category of "Realism." People do these things. But they didn't start by buying outfits.

it's just that they would take decades to come to fruition,

Not necessarily. Captain Killdozer didn't spend years doing his thing. Weeks, maybe. And you pointed out that "he lost" but he only lost because he was stupid. His plan was to kill himself. If he'd simply installed a remote control in his killdozer he could have walked away from the ordeal. You guys could easily do something like that. You have the money and you have a friend who's into robotics. Building an armored tank out of a bulldozer and going on a building-destroying spree is easily within your ability. And if you paired it with a youtube video announcing yourselves to the world as a supervillain...poof, instantly you'd be a supervillain. No years of effort required.

I'm not saying that you should do this. Maybe you don't want to destroy a bunch of buildings. But it's obviously an option.

You guys do have options. You just need to decide on a goal and find a way to make it happen rather than deciding what you want to look like and then trying to become that thing by replicating the look. That's cargo cult science. It doesn't work. You don't become a millionaire by rushing out first thing and buying expensive cars and mansions. You don't get married by buying a wedding ring and a tux. You don't become famous by calling up Forbes and offering to let them interview you.

Buy the horse, then the cart.

[GreatWyrmGold]

tell you what... give me an evil idea, I'll explain why it wouldn't work

Your past four posts on the page have just been complaining. If you don't want to play, that's fine. But if you're going to deliberately sabotage the thread, kindly fuck off please.

I'm not trying to sabotage it, I'm trying to improve it. I'm not the only one complaining--are the others also thread saboteurs?
Alright, maybe I'm being blunter than most, but there is a problem here. We want to be a supervillain. You want to be realistic. Guess what? Realistically, a college student with a lot of money but no experience in stuff isn't going to get much of anywhere. He might get a crime off, but good luck with Crime #2. Besides, you can't plot with thousands of dollars and a house. We need something to make us more than a criminal. Say the Mafia is interested in our attempts at villainy, say we live near a DARPA lab we could rob, say an alien spaceship has crashed where in the area. Wait until we're super before piling on the realistic. This thread has potential, but isn't using it right. We're a supervillain with no super and little villain.

And speaking about the realisticness...Well, remember when the villain's mom mistook him for gay? Page 3? As someone once said, you don't wake up gay. If I made a gold costume with a skull design, my mom might question my sanity (more?), but she wouldn't assume I was suddenly gay. At the time, I thought it was a silly little gag to poke fun at our sense of style, but it meshes poorly with the seriousness you claim and the ultra-realism you tend towards.