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Author Topic: Horrorfailed the Battle-Cannon of Hell - Please do not feed the nobles  (Read 578581 times)

Mr Space Cat

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I'm impressed. The fort already died horribly.

Anyway, I just realized how AXES+EVIL AREA=REANIMATED ZOMBIE LIMBS

I can be dorfed a hammerdwarf instead, if you guys prefer. Hammers are just as viking as axes.
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Made a new account that I use instead of this one. Don't message this one, I'm probably not gonna use it.

New account: Spehss _

Gizogin

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Right, I'm almost to the end of spring.  No dwarves have died yet, though two were exposed to either the muck or the mist and are rotting alive.  A full update is on the way.

EDIT: Naturally, as soon as I say this, three dwarves drop dead simultaneously.
« Last Edit: August 20, 2012, 02:46:59 pm by Gizogin »
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Quote from: franti
"Let's expose our military to zombie-dust so they can't feel pain. They don't NEED skin."
Quote from: Ipwnurmom221
One FB post. Many dick jokes. Pokemon. !!VOLCANO!!. Dwarven mood thingee. Derailment itself. Girlinhat's hat. Cuba. Karl Marx. This is why i love Bay12 forums.
The rest of my sig.
Fear the fluffballs

Spish

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Come now, you can be more specific than that.
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Ah, yes, I thought something was amiss. Now I see. There's not enough terrible things in the lakes.

Gizogin

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Journal of Gizogin, Rawmancer:

Actually, I don't have any creativity today, so I'm just going to relay everything that happened, without trying to be in-character.

Starting seven: Gizogin, Deathsword, El Presidente, CatalystParadox, ThatAussieDwarf, DevilEd, Dinjoralo
I got everyone underground right away.  Then nothing happened for a while, so I decided to risk sending a couple of dwarves (Dinjoralo and Catalyst) back to the wagon to grab supplies.  They got almost everything in, surprisingly, before being interrupted by a buck rabbit corpse.  I drafted El Presidente (I gave him some military skills on embark), and he caved its head in with a single punch.

Meanwhile, I had the others digging out some more space, planting more food, and building more workshops.  By the end of the second month, everything from the caravan was underground, along with a few other bits I decided to claim, and we had most of the food-related workshops built.  Then a raven skeleton found a hole in the wall and started scaring everyone, so I called El Presidente back in.  He dealt with it swiftly (seriously, the guy's a machine).

I then dug out an underground refuse stockpile, because I knew that a surface one was just asking for trouble.  I also called everyone back inside, and sealed up the entrance.  Then I realized just what an idiot I am.  Catalyst, Dinjoralo, and El Presidente were all rotting alive, along with a cat and our horse and moose.  They were just spewing miasma everywhere, until they eventually died as their lungs disintegrated.  Some combination of that fetid muck and nefarious mist is, as I should have learned from Aussie, ridiculously deadly.

Interestingly enough, Aussie himself is ecstatic.  No idea how that works.
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Quote from: franti
"Let's expose our military to zombie-dust so they can't feel pain. They don't NEED skin."
Quote from: Ipwnurmom221
One FB post. Many dick jokes. Pokemon. !!VOLCANO!!. Dwarven mood thingee. Derailment itself. Girlinhat's hat. Cuba. Karl Marx. This is why i love Bay12 forums.
The rest of my sig.
Fear the fluffballs

Eric Blank

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He's still recovering after going SRM. He's just so insane he's F*^%(#@ ECSTATIC.
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I make Spellcrafts!
I have no idea where anything is. I have no idea what anything does. This is not merely a madhouse designed by a madman, but a madhouse designed by many madmen, each with an intense hatred for the previous madman's unique flavour of madness.

Gizogin

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Speaking of which, I just went stark raving mad after DevilEd died of lung rot.  Aussie and Deathsword are both ecstatic, probably because they're going steady.

Mid-summer, some migrants show up.  They got in with minimal casualties, and one of them, a blacksmith, actually downed a couple of zombie dwarves.  He is now in the military.  We're back up to eleven dwarves, so I'm going through the dorfing list to get some people dorfed.
Logged
Quote from: franti
"Let's expose our military to zombie-dust so they can't feel pain. They don't NEED skin."
Quote from: Ipwnurmom221
One FB post. Many dick jokes. Pokemon. !!VOLCANO!!. Dwarven mood thingee. Derailment itself. Girlinhat's hat. Cuba. Karl Marx. This is why i love Bay12 forums.
The rest of my sig.
Fear the fluffballs

Eric Blank

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I hope my dwarf is a MAN this time...
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I make Spellcrafts!
I have no idea where anything is. I have no idea what anything does. This is not merely a madhouse designed by a madman, but a madhouse designed by many madmen, each with an intense hatred for the previous madman's unique flavour of madness.

Deviled

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Woo I am not de-son of a elf

Whee, back on the dorf list I go.
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Gizogin

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I hope my dwarf is a MAN this time...

Roger that.

Currently dwarfed are:

Mego (married to Arcangelsd)
Deathsword (romantically involved with TAD)
Volfgarix (married to DTZ)
Newbunkle (married to Nexus)
Eric Blank (married to EmeraldWind)
Dark_T_Zeratul
EmeraldWind
Nexus
Gizogin (insane)
Arcangelsd
ThatAussieDwarf

Seriously, everyone who just arrived came with a spouse.  It's ridiculous.
Logged
Quote from: franti
"Let's expose our military to zombie-dust so they can't feel pain. They don't NEED skin."
Quote from: Ipwnurmom221
One FB post. Many dick jokes. Pokemon. !!VOLCANO!!. Dwarven mood thingee. Derailment itself. Girlinhat's hat. Cuba. Karl Marx. This is why i love Bay12 forums.
The rest of my sig.
Fear the fluffballs

Gizogin

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Okay, I'm done.  Not much else happened.  I died of thirst, some more migrants showed up and were promptly destroyed by the wilddeath, I failed horribly at breaching the aquifer, and the caravan showed up.  I just stole everything from them, as I had nothing to trade.  I put in a request for stone, wood, and metal for next year with the liaison.

Save to follow shortly.

The save.

I'll PM the next guy.
« Last Edit: August 20, 2012, 05:38:57 pm by Gizogin »
Logged
Quote from: franti
"Let's expose our military to zombie-dust so they can't feel pain. They don't NEED skin."
Quote from: Ipwnurmom221
One FB post. Many dick jokes. Pokemon. !!VOLCANO!!. Dwarven mood thingee. Derailment itself. Girlinhat's hat. Cuba. Karl Marx. This is why i love Bay12 forums.
The rest of my sig.
Fear the fluffballs

Dinjoralo

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Damnit, I had a cool crappy little intro and everything planned out and I kill myself right as I come in. I'd ask for a redorf, but I'd feel that would be a bit needy.
I might as well show this, since I did arrive:
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
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Eric Blank

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Damn, Gizo, you completed your turn before Deathsword even got around to updating your status on the turn list!
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I make Spellcrafts!
I have no idea where anything is. I have no idea what anything does. This is not merely a madhouse designed by a madman, but a madhouse designed by many madmen, each with an intense hatred for the previous madman's unique flavour of madness.

Megaman3321

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Dear god this fort is dying to its reputation :o

I forgot to ask, but could I get a dwarf?

Name: Megaman3321
Profession: Crossbowman
Custom title: Cyborg
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Glacial on dwarves being assigned socks:
Quote
You see, here's how I think this works:
Overseer: Welcome to the military! You need to wear socks! Dorf: Oh, I should get military socks. My socks are civilian socks. Dorf discards socks Dorf: You know, I need a whole lot of gear now. I should get socks... last. Oh, but these steel boots with the white goo on them are nice!
I know you can pick up water, then throw said water, while underwater, to kill a fish -He_Silent_H

renegadelobster

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Could i be dorfed please?

NAME: Thaddeus the Fail-Saint
PROFESSION: Hammerdwarf
CUSTOM PROFESSION NAME: Fail
EXTRA REQUESTS: Redorf when/if possible please
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Well, it only hates Linux for now. If we could condition it to hate computer viruses, than hooray! Free, brutal virus protection! Unless you have Linux!

Teneb

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I'll do the turn list and dorf list updates later today. Glad to see we survived.
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Monstrous Manual: D&D in DF
Quote from: Tack
What if “slammed in the ass by dead philosophers” is actually the thing which will progress our culture to the next step?
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