Welcome to the Before Six Special, where I adjust to my brand-new high school schedule by waking up at 5:30 on the last day of summer! Of course, when school actually starts I'll need to be on the road at 6:15 to catch my bus. At 7:00, my brother will still be asleep and I'll be in class. At least the second semester starts at a reasonable hour! And Friday too!
Of course, I'll still draw this, but don't expect me to be fully conscious while doing so.
Playing as humans and accidently embarked on a modbold camp. I expect the local alligator to cause trouble with the settlers, but no.
Ecroh Eganusbi, Colonel cacels dig: Interrupted by cat.
Yeah, the modbolds' livestock is considered feral, so the first fight of the year was a cat getting gutted by a miner. Literally.
I just remembered I love reposting this
I don't really know what's going on here.
In the waiting room are magazines like "Microcline Monthly: The 50 Best Microcline Trade Goods" and "Thirteen: One Hundred Glamorous Things To Wear At Your Wedding". A live crundle tops the list, worn as an accessory.
I'm sorry i don't have the actual image for it as i abandoned the fort due to an irreperable goblin ambush gutting everything, however i was wondering if you'd be so kind as to draw something that happend in my old fort,
My cavy herd was being raided by bzzards when my militia captain arrived to stop the feathered fiends and protect our valuable guinea pigs, anyways, the biggest boar i nthe herd was attacked by a buzzard only for my militia commander who was an adept wrestler, to grab it by the tongue and throw it into the nearby defensive wall killing it.
Do this please 
The captain of the guard relentlessly hews The Centauress in the left forefoot from behind with the full force of his (slademantine battle axe) and the severed part sails off in an arc!
The Recruit bashes The Centauress in the head with his (steel war hammer), bruising the muscle, jamming the skull through the outer brain, tearing the outer brain and bruising the brain!
The Centauress looks sick!
The (steel war hammer) has lodged firmly in the wound!
The Centauress strangles The Stray Donkey's throat!
The Centauress strangles The Stray Donkey's throat!
The captain of the guard makes an undercut swing at The Centauress in the tail, lower torso from behind with the power of his (slademantine battle axe) and the severed part sails off in an arc!
The Centauress strangles The Stray Donkey's throat!
The Centauress strangles The Stray Donkey's throat!
The captain of the guard makes an backhanded strike at The Centauress in the left hand from behind with his (slademantine battle axe) and the severed part sails off in an arc!
The Centauress strangles The Stray Donkey's throat!
The Recruit stands up.
The captain of the guard blocks and hits The Centauress in the right hind leg from behind with his right hand, bruising the muscle!
The Centauress strangles The Stray Donkey's throat!
The Centauress strangles The Stray Donkey's throat!
The captain of the guard emphatically slices The Centauress in the right forefoot from behind with the honed axeblade of his (slademantine battle axe), tearing apart the muscle!
The Centauress falls over.
The Centauress strangles The Stray Donkey's throat!
The Farmer stands up.
The captain of the guard lacerates The Centauress in the left arm from behind with the blade of his (slademantine battle axe) and the severed part sails off in an arc!
The Centauress strangles The Stray Donkey's throat!
The Centauress strangles The Stray Donkey's throat!
The captain of the guard whirls around and cleaves The Centauress in the upper torso from behind with the heavy blade of his (slademantine battle axe) and the severed part sails off in an arc!
The Stray Donkey regains consciousness.
The Stray Donkey stands up.
The Stray Donkey is no longer stunned.
Can you find the hidden message?
My dwarf adventurer was constantly interrupted when he was casually napping in the wilderness, first by dingoes, then by bogeymen and then by a goblin overlord and his lackeys. Now the dwarf is sleeping atop their corpses.
My war gorilla flew four tiles after throwing a goblin against himself.
Motion blur! Wow, it almost looks like I tried really hard.
Well, I demand a scandalously sexy centerfold!
Don't worry, I made more than one.
I get the feeling that Goomba is about to open a magazine site for all us weird ASCII peoples.
Only by popular demand! I actually doodled a mock-up over the week. The cover features my best rendering of the not mind safe picture.
This magazine seems mildly horrifying. Does it menace with spikes of wood?
Processed wood pulp
I've got one, though it isn't mine, it's the source of the quote in my signature.
Basically, a dining room party, full of civie dwarves, with a waterfall at one end. Suddenly, a forgotten beast emerges from the bottom of the waterfall. Essentially a twenty foot fire breathing chicken. No special materials, just flesh and blood and feathers. The civilians swarm the beast and proceed to punch it unconcious, without a single casualty, and then a miner puts his pick through its skull. The massive corpse is then hauled to the butcher shop, and six years later, four kitchens working nonstop are still churning out devil-fried chicken.
Motion blur AND an RGB noise filter applied only in blue! Damn!
Whitout report:
In one of my earlier forts I had caught a troll, and thought to sell it to the humans. Sadly, the haulers only planned on selling the cage. The Troll was free, picked up the hauler by his toe, and smashed him into the wall.
And now, a special bonus feature:
CHILLING TALES OF MY VACATION, AS TOLD BY ME AT SIX-THIRTY IN THE MORNING!Where did I go? Okay, well, it was in British Colombia, and here's the real kicker:
it had mountains. You should be able to figure it out from there.
THE CHILLING TALE OF THE WASA LAKE RINGI only visited my family for a day, I didn't stay there. Okay, by process of elimination you could probably figure out my last name from this. It's a small town. They have a gas station and the gas station lady runs the post office. If you want furniture you check the dump, or drive to a place with more than three people like Kimberley or something.
Anyway, according to my cousin, when she was seven she found this ring with a diamond on it underwater. She pulled it up and the diamond fell out. There is apparently a large-ish diamond in this lake. Bring your gold pans or something and get cracking! The ring was later lost (see: when she was seven), but still! Lakebed treasure! Ooooh!
THE CHILLING TALE OF THE ESTELLA MINEFrom their house in Wasa, I could see a mountain road destroyed by a landslide. The general consensus was that the road was a seven-hour hike (or one-hour drive) to the abandoned site of the Estella Mine right up Mount Bill Nye (yes), but a landslide had cut off access (apparently it did this every year and the usual team of boulder-clearing guys were all off in Vancouver or drunk or something) so you had to get out of your car and hike for another hour to get to the mine. But what was in this mine? I looked it up, heart pounding.
It was a lead and zinc mine, the world's most exciting metals. Did they also mine microcline?! (No.) Anyway, operations ceased sometime in the sixties when they dug too deep and... ran out of lead and zinc. Sigh. The mine's entrance is now caved in by the mining company, but before they blasted it, my great-uncle snuck in and stole a box of drilling cores that were laying around! They spent the next thirty years sitting under an unused railcar until some jerk stole them.
THE CHILLING TALE OF THE MYSTERIOUS AMERICAN KIDIn the pool, this little kid kept screaming at me. His parents were from Washington (I saw their plate). So I started spouting French-isms at him and my little brother jumped in and said "That's my brother. He's from Quebec.". Then the kid thought I was the coolest thing ever. Small children are mysterious.
THE CHILLING TALE OF THE BEARSWe were walking down the road and saw these bears. We then turned around.
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