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[Hanslanda]

Everyone always mistakes me for going on a rant when I pull out the soapbox. I just want to reach the top shelf, dammit! >.<

Its okay, MZ. When I'm facing at work (pulling stock to the front for sale) everyone always makes me do the top shelf because I'm taller than pretty much everyone I work with. It's not as cool as it might seem to be able to reach the top shelf, because tall people die sooner.

[Korbac]

Tall people die sooner.

But we live... LONGER!!!

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If you didn't :
http://instantrimshot.com/

[MaximumZero]

Everyone always mistakes me for going on a rant when I pull out the soapbox. I just want to reach the top shelf, dammit! >.<

Its okay, MZ. When I'm facing at work (pulling stock to the front for sale) everyone always makes me do the top shelf because I'm taller than pretty much everyone I work with. It's not as cool as it might seem to be able to reach the top shelf, because tall people die sooner.

That's because you bastards keep leaning on the top of my head.

[Hanslanda]

The only headtops I lean on are female, and then only because they think it is sooooo annoying.

[MaximumZero]

You've never been flipped on your back by an enraged dwarf? Pity.

[JoshuaFH]

A few days ago I had to accompany my mom to the hospital cause she started panicking about something or other, and we wound up staying till about 5 AM. There goes my carefully cultivated sleeping schedule crafted over the course of an entire month, hello again terrible sleeping schedule, it feels like you never left.

I just wish I didn't feel like crap having to flip my shit around, again.

[JoshuaFH]

About the psyche that I called back, it turns out that my cell phone's service got frozen, and while I thought he had just forgotten about me, turns out he couldn't contact me at all and I only found out weeks later because I straight up never use my cell phone.

So I called him back again, and this time managed to talk to him personally, and actually got an appointment set up for 1:00 tomorrow, which was so soon that I was really shocked. I sincerely thought I'd have to wait a week or two, but he was willing to take me in today. I couldn't do today though, I've been up for 36 hours and I can't think straight, so I opted for tomorrow at 1 instead. I honestly thought he was busier than that, I mean, damnit Saginaw where's all your crazies?! There's a ton of'em I know it!

I was thinking of printing out all the thought out posts I've made here as things to talk about, but I should atleast introduce myself in person first.

[Descan]

Yeah, but the crazies you -know- of are untreated! So obviously they've no bearing on a psychologists time-table.

[JoshuaFH]

Just thought that he'd be knee deep in ppl that need his help is all, as the receptionist mentioned he was the only male psyche there, it makes sense that demand for his attention would be high.

I think I'll just keep a short list of key points on hand, as I clam up too easily.

[JoshuaFH]

So I took a few minutes to summarize the most pressing issues in my mind on written paper, so that I will have them right at hand when I'm being prodded for answers on the pleather couch, and this will hopefully make my sessions more efficient, requiring fewer of them.

Allow me to transcribe the few points that I wrote down, which should've only consumed half a page of paper, but consumed an entire page thanks to the odd formatting I insisted on rigidly enforcing, and my big, wonky, out-of-practice handwriting:

1. Deeply, troublingly lonely. I don't know if I'll ever know companionship, and I think I very well may die alone.

2. I have no confidence to approach women. The thought of approaching girls makes me extremely uneasy.

3. It is often difficulty to see the intrinsic merit in working hard, if it is only to satisfy the base desires that only exist by the necessities present in the natural and human condition.

4. The girl who sent me careening off my safe-track of static contentment, and ultimately why I'm here.


I think that fulfills what I'm trying to get at for now.

[rarborman]

Thats it JoshuaFH, you get in this RL hug this instant.

It's all alone... waiting for you... or anyone really.

[JoshuaFH]

I'm gonna need to give that hug a rain check for the moment.

So I went to the psyche. We talked for about an hour, and he's really nice so far. Though if the co-pay will be nearly 30 bucks for each visit, I'm gonna need to work out some kind of budget with my Mom.

[rarborman]

So... lonely... forever.

+cry because of no hug

[Hanslanda]

So... lonely... forever.

+cry because of no hug

Not forever. Just be patient.

[rarborman]

I havent seen any of my family since the seventh, and it was to get groceries and pay rent/get money but I lost my sister I was with when I got to the store so was more like shopping alone, I havent been with my family since april when we went to the zoo and chinese afterwards, I havent seen any of my friends since march when one came over to chill and eat some mcdeath and before it was when I was still in school nearly two year ago now, I dont like any of my neighbors because we have nothing in common besides where we happen to live, and I just kicked my long time absent roommate out for not paying rent on the first...

I cant remember the last time I had a hug.