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[brainfreez]

if you're overweight , first start with losing weight and growing muscles , that will make you feel better and more comfortable near women .

[kidhedera]

Joshua,

I am also a bit wary of mental health professionals, but if you can find a good one, they are worth their weight in gold - and all the hassle it takes to find them.

I'm in Australia so its a bit different I suppose, but here the very first question that any of the mental health professionals asked was what sort of doctor I was looking for, what sort of therapy, and if I had any gender/sexuality preferences in my doctor. It took over six months for my GP to find me a psychologist, because of this 'mutual interviewing' situation. (I didn't give a fig about their gender and sexuality, but a surprising number of them cared about mine! And I was going through a GP from the cities largest LGBT clinic! SO weird.)

So my recommendation would be to ask the receptionist as many questions as you like. If you are shy in person or on the phone request their email address and ask if you can email through some questions, or if they have a website where you can assess their staff to select a shrink.

Also, on the weight loss thing - eh. Exercise can be really good for mental health and confidence, but reducing the amount you eat can lead to all kind of neurotic and paranoid thought patterns so might not help with social anxiety. So exercise more, don't eat less!

Also congratulations on the new job!

[JoshuaFH]

I didn't get the job yet, just an interview, I'll be calling them again today to followup.

[Korbac]

I didn't get the job yet, just an interview, I'll be calling them again today to followup.

In my experience, confidence is worth more than experience in getting the job. In doing well in it... That may be different, but I've gotten far (education wise at least) in just feigning knowledge by being cocksure. It's annoying that it works, but oh well...

[JoshuaFH]

Cocksure has been added to my internal diction.

So I called the place that'll set me up with a psyche through my insurance again, though there'll be a co-pay it's only about 22-25 bucks I think.

Spoiler: tucked away (click to show/hide)

I feel really terrible talking on phones period, but combining that with ALSO implicitly admitting weakness and asking for help, I feel so pathetic and awkward with just the receptionist. I feel as though that I'm just the unfortunate human waste, one of the broken and helpless people that the structure of modern society inevitably produces, and it's just the task of these individuals that I'm asking to deal with me, to just superficially shove away whatever maleficent emotional baggage to only maybe achieve functionality on my part and to stop being a burden on the rest of the human race.

I did have to ask for a male psyche, and apparently there's only one and I need to wait for him to call me back, since apparently he makes his own appointments.

EDIT: I'll just tuck my emotional waxing away and just say that I'm feeling less motivated recently, that my burst of self-confidence is starting to wane and now I'm back to always beating back negative thoughts in my head.

[MaximumZero]

So! T'all you dandies out there. So proud. So cocksure...Prancin' aboot with yer head fulla eyeballs!

[kidhedera]

Oh Korbac, you are so right - the number of incompetent nincompoops I've had to work with in IT because business managers value confidence over competence... *sigh*. Its really awkward sometimes,  especially when Nincompoop McNewITManager calls me to ask what a 3G modem is and how he'd go about procuring one for the CEO. Or Nincompoop McNewSocialMediaSpecialist asks me "so what *is* this tweeter thing the CEO wants?" And actually starts taking notes when I answer. On the bright side (for the nincompoops at least), I've never seen the business managers notice the amazing IT disasters unfolding under their very feet. If only magma pits and pressure plates activated by the size of your ego were something I was allowed to install...

Joshua... dude, sounds like you are in a really rough place. Modern society is pretty fucked up, and it certainly produces a whole lot of suffering and damaged people - but you sir, are making movements towards being a more healthy and whole individual. That's a pretty rare thing - not just letting yourself stagnate in your own emotional miasma, and so you have my respect. I'd tell you to be proud of yourself, but I've been there, and I know its pretty hard to feel good about anything when your that low.

I believe americans have *incredibly expensive* health care, so maybe focus on the fact you are paying a lot of money for a service, and are thus entitled to it? Dunno. At anyrate, good on you for perservering in the face of all these negative feelings.

I hope that the guy shrink you found is nice, and you two fit well.

Also, good luck with the interview! I misunderstood and thought that you had the job already. I hope it goes well. Remember - you play DF, so you *must* be more awesome than all their other candidates.

PS MaximumZero... *mad giggles* THE MENTAL IMAGE. LOL.

[Kagus]

As far as insecurity in the face of assistance is concerned, just remember...  The receptionist, and most certainly the shrink, have both seen FAR worse hangups than what you're going through.  Doesn't mean you're any less worthy of getting help, because this is affecting your life and that just happens to be their explicit purpose in being there (helping you, that is), but just don't worry so much about "making a bad impression".  I know how that is too, took me a while to accept the idea.


And, really, I've heard some things and read some things about how really most of us should be in dialogue with a psychologist ("us", as in individuals in a modern society, not Bay12.  Everyone knows that that's a lost cause).  It's just such an incredible boon having someone learned to talk to who, potentially, knows ways of thinking your way around certain problems or situations that crop up.

[MaximumZero]

PS MaximumZero... *mad giggles* THE MENTAL IMAGE. LOL.

The video is better.

[Korbac]

Come on Josh! Stick with it! You've been doing really well these past weeks. If you can undergo such a drastic change so quickly, you're on the cusp of flinging your life 1080 degrees and turning it into something truly amazing.

[Kagus]

Come on Josh! Stick with it! You've been doing really well these past weeks. If you can undergo such a drastic change so quickly, you're on the cusp of flinging your life 1080 degrees and turning it into something truly amazing.

So, basically, spinning around for three full revolutions before heading off again in exactly the same direction, although slightly dizzier than before?  Yeah, sounds about right.

Although I'd probably recommend something more akin to 135 degrees; thus heading off in a new direction which is also no longer backwards.

[Korbac]

Come on Josh! Stick with it! You've been doing really well these past weeks. If you can undergo such a drastic change so quickly, you're on the cusp of flinging your life 1080 degrees and turning it into something truly amazing.

So, basically, spinning around for three full revolutions before heading off again in exactly the same direction, although slightly dizzier than before?  Yeah, sounds about right.

Although I'd probably recommend something more akin to 135 degrees; thus heading off in a new direction which is also no longer backwards.

Sometimes all you need is a new frame of mind.

[JoshuaFH]

Why won't this stupid doctor call me back? I missed his first phone call through sheer accident, and I call him back to get his machine, and now I've just dropped off his radar. I guess I just need to call back again and hope for the best.

I suppose this is just the place I soapbox now.

[Hanslanda]

Why won't this stupid doctor call me back? I missed his first phone call through sheer accident, and I call him back to get his machine, and now I've just dropped off his radar. I guess I just need to call back again and hope for the best.

I suppose this is just the place I soapbox now.

Sometimes venting is nice. I do mine here in the various threads so I don't do it in reality, to some poor unfortunate.

[MaximumZero]

Everyone always mistakes me for going on a rant when I pull out the soapbox. I just want to reach the top shelf, dammit! >.<