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Author Topic: Valve's employee handbook leaks, amusing, clever, flatness apparently a thing  (Read 5152 times)

Jackrabbit

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Valve's employee handbook leaks, amusing, clever, flatness apparently a thing
« on: April 23, 2012, 02:39:22 am »
Valve's employee handbook has been leaked from Valve's company intranet, where it has apparently sat for a very long time being all amusing and shit without us ever knowing about it.

It gives significant insight into how Valve works, their hiring system, how they treat their employees, how they develop games and why they're not being hyperbolic when they claim they're 'more than just a games studio'.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)
« Last Edit: April 23, 2012, 05:03:39 am by Jackrabbit »
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Fiskav

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Re: Valve's employee handbook leaks, amusing, clever, flatness apparently a thing
« Reply #1 on: April 23, 2012, 02:59:47 am »
.
« Last Edit: December 08, 2015, 01:04:20 am by Fiskav »
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Osmosis Jones

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Re: Valve's employee handbook leaks, amusing, clever, flatness apparently a thing
« Reply #2 on: April 23, 2012, 03:18:58 am »
Seriously... that is so awesome. Also, everyone really needs to take the time to read the blog post by Michael Abrash linked in that PC Gamer article. I wish I had skills even remotely applicable to apply there :o
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Quote from: Il Palazzo on November 14, 2011, 03:35:18 pm
The Marx generator will produce Engels-waves which should allow the inherently unstable isotope of Leninium to undergo a rapid Stalinisation in mere trockoseconds.

Nulzilcho

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Re: Valve's employee handbook leaks, amusing, clever, flatness apparently a thing
« Reply #3 on: April 23, 2012, 03:43:46 am »
Quote from: Jackrabbit on April 23, 2012, 02:39:22 am
Valve's employee handbook has been "leaked" from Valve's marketing/PR department, where it has apparently sat for a very long time before someone decided it certainly couldn't hurt to get some more mileage out of it.

^ That seems more likely. To me, anyway. Also it is a pretty neat handbook regardless.
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Catapultam habeo. Nisi pecuniam omnem mihi dabis, ad caput tuum saxum immane mittam.

Trapezohedron

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Re: Valve's employee handbook leaks, amusing, clever, flatness apparently a thing
« Reply #4 on: April 23, 2012, 03:59:10 am »
Handbook looks neat, with a bunch of humor thrown in just 'cause they can. And yeah, I think this "leak" is intentional.

E: Inb4HL3discussion/derail
« Last Edit: April 23, 2012, 04:12:03 am by New Guy »
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Jackrabbit

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Re: Valve's employee handbook leaks, amusing, clever, flatness apparently a thing
« Reply #5 on: April 23, 2012, 04:00:50 am »
Yeah, this is just the sort of thing they'd do for a laugh. Not that I'm complaining. I quite like how the handbook is essentially a wikipedia page and any Valve employee can edit it.
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Osmosis Jones

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Re: Valve's employee handbook leaks, amusing, clever, flatness apparently a thing
« Reply #6 on: April 23, 2012, 04:15:14 am »
Quote from: Jackrabbit on April 23, 2012, 02:39:22 am
Spoiler (click to show/hide)

and mostly Australian!
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Quote from: Il Palazzo on November 14, 2011, 03:35:18 pm
The Marx generator will produce Engels-waves which should allow the inherently unstable isotope of Leninium to undergo a rapid Stalinisation in mere trockoseconds.

Nulzilcho

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Re: Valve's employee handbook leaks, amusing, clever, flatness apparently a thing
« Reply #7 on: April 23, 2012, 05:09:46 am »
Quote from: New Guy on April 23, 2012, 03:59:10 am
E: Inb4HL3discussion/derail

MAKEWITHTHEHL3ALREADY!
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SalmonGod

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Re: Valve's employee handbook leaks, amusing, clever, flatness apparently a thing
« Reply #8 on: April 23, 2012, 05:19:04 am »
Finished reading it a few minutes ago.  Spent the next couple minutes swallowing my infinite sorrow.  Then ran around spamming the link everywhere.  Finished with a post in the sad thread, and spotted this thread 5 seconds later.

Quote from: Osmosis Jones on April 23, 2012, 03:18:58 am
Seriously... that is so awesome. Also, everyone really needs to take the time to read the blog post by Michael Abrash linked in that PC Gamer article. I wish I had skills even remotely applicable to apply there :o

Oh god...

Quote from: MAbrash
It started with Snow Crash

I've only read this one line.  Already asking myself... could it have possible opened with a more promising sentence?
« Last Edit: April 23, 2012, 05:20:59 am by SalmonGod »
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In the land of twilight, under the moon
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Quote from: Vector on October 06, 2011, 03:14:08 pm
Maybe people should love for the sake of loving, and not with all of these optimization conditions.

lemon10

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Re: Valve's employee handbook leaks, amusing, clever, flatness apparently a thing
« Reply #9 on: April 23, 2012, 05:27:30 am »
Godamnit.
I wish I could work at valve.
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SalmonGod

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Re: Valve's employee handbook leaks, amusing, clever, flatness apparently a thing
« Reply #10 on: April 23, 2012, 05:47:56 am »
So yeah... MAbrash's blog post is full of amazing stuff.  It's also great for making me feel incredibly inadequate :P
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In the land of twilight, under the moon
We dance for the idiots
As the end will come so soon
In the land of twilight

Quote from: Vector on October 06, 2011, 03:14:08 pm
Maybe people should love for the sake of loving, and not with all of these optimization conditions.

DarkWolfXV

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Re: Valve's employee handbook leaks, amusing, clever, flatness apparently a thing
« Reply #11 on: April 23, 2012, 07:26:51 am »
I want to work there now:D
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Quote from: DarkWolfXV on July 19, 2012, 12:21:31 pm
Quote from: DJ on July 19, 2012, 09:06:28 am
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Probably thats why they are used with pentagrams on covers of Satanic Black Metal albums.
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justinlee999

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Re: Valve's employee handbook leaks, amusing, clever, flatness apparently a thing
« Reply #12 on: April 23, 2012, 07:52:23 am »
New life goal: Get enough qualifications and experience to work at Valve.
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Jackrabbit

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Re: Valve's employee handbook leaks, amusing, clever, flatness apparently a thing
« Reply #13 on: April 23, 2012, 09:02:41 am »
My god, the glossary at the end legitimately had me in stiches. I don't openly laugh much, but damn did that do it. This has made me want to pursue a career in game design.
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Flying Dice

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Re: Valve's employee handbook leaks, amusing, clever, flatness apparently a thing
« Reply #14 on: April 23, 2012, 09:13:43 am »
Oh, this is a thing of beauty. Thankee for posting it.
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