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Author Topic: Adventures on Monster Island  (Read 268273 times)

Thecard

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Re: Adventures on Monster Island
« Reply #90 on: February 22, 2012, 08:06:21 pm »

Huh.  Well, what setting did you use?  Also, I'm loving the art.  The Heartbroken drawing killed me, especially after the Heather joke.
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I think the slaughter part is what made them angry.
OOC: Dachshundofdoom: This is how the world ends, not with a bang but with goddamn VUVUZELAS.
Those hookers aren't getting out any time soon, no matter how many fancy gadgets they have :v

Nonsequitorian

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Re: Adventures on Monster Island
« Reply #91 on: February 22, 2012, 08:32:44 pm »

I'm seriously loving this. There are no civilizations? So you'll always be naked and spear wielding? That's cool.

Askot Bokbondeler

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Re: Adventures on Monster Island
« Reply #92 on: February 22, 2012, 08:46:55 pm »

postin ta follow

Rudefire

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Re: Adventures on Monster Island
« Reply #93 on: February 22, 2012, 08:47:23 pm »

This is incredible. You may have finally given me the argument I need to convince my friends to start playing this game.
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Dante

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Re: Adventures on Monster Island
« Reply #94 on: February 22, 2012, 09:51:03 pm »

Amazing story, amazing art. Posting to follow.

Loud Whispers

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Re: Adventures on Monster Island
« Reply #95 on: February 22, 2012, 09:52:59 pm »

PTW

addictgamer

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Re: Adventures on Monster Island
« Reply #96 on: February 22, 2012, 11:54:17 pm »

When I saw that comic with the floating head, I fell out of my chair laughing. That must have been the stupidest hungry head in existence.
The neighbors are not pleased, though, as that hungry head is now bugging them in hell.
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I'm patiently waiting for the ability to mine and construct palaces in adventure mode.
Barony. A 3D, multiplayer roguelike I am developing.

Gotdamnmiracle

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Re: Adventures on Monster Island
« Reply #97 on: February 22, 2012, 11:56:04 pm »

When I saw that comic with the floating head, I fell out of my chair laughing. That must have been the stupidest hungry head in existence.
The neighbors are not pleased, though, as that hungry head is now bugging them in hell.

That is their hell!!
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Go back see if he's there and run him over, and drink his gun!

Earwig

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Re: Adventures on Monster Island
« Reply #98 on: February 23, 2012, 12:25:57 am »

I head northward. I've decided I'm gonna go over the entire island, finding every lair, and murder every monster I find. Or die trying. Probably the latter.



A rough-hewn basalt wall looms in front of me.



I climb up top but it's literally just a plateau with a black sand top, so I clamber back down and double check my compass. Ah hah. They're underneath it!

I creep forward, noticing a door inside of a little hollow in the sand. It's made of ash wood.



On a peaceful happy world such as this, no locks exist, so I walk right on in like I own the place. LOOK OUT, BILBO!



Inside, there's a bunch of toad remains in an olivine mortar with a smoky quartz pestle.  Really quite pretty. Uh, despite the toad mush. Who the fuck mushes up toads in a mortar and pestle, seriously? Unless they have no teeth. That'd be sad. 8(

In the south is a quern made out of pipe opal, which is also a truly beautiful mineral. Look at that. That is some gorgeous goddamn geology, god damnit ugh it makes me so angry I gotta go eat some monsters



I head deeper in to find Mr. Bilbo Toadpaste. And not surprisingly, he's just kind of chilling out like most of these monsters seem to do on this island.



His name is Ana˙a, which I think is super dumb. So I fix it for him.


That's better.

Vanod creeps up behind him, his breath quiet, his sunken eyes wide with bloodlust.

Bilbo feels a prickle, a coldness, at the back of his neck. The glare of a predator... THE predator... is upon him


He calls out in a nervous squeak:

ha ha okay I will

Vanod calls his bluff, leaping from the shadows and stabbing right through Bilbo's leg, pinning him briefly to the floor with a soft chuff of sand.



Bilbo manages to hit Vanod in the right foot, but it only manages to bruise Vanod's muscle. Negligible. Vanod bites back with a swing of his well-bloodied spear:



Bilbo's screams of pain make Vanod's mouth water, and he can't wait any longer.



He shakes Bilbo around like a helpless rabbit in the jaws of... a feral Vanod, spilling his filthy guts onto the sandy cavern floor. Bilbo tries feebly to bite Vanod back, but only manages to bruise Vanod's left hand slightly.



Another savage bite, and then Vanod leaps away as Bilbo tries in vain to hit him. Bilbo thrashes in his pooling blood and spilled intestines as Vanod skirts back in the shadows.

Vanod paces.

The monster is pathetic.

Pathetically DELICIOUS.

A running leap and Bilbo is skewered through the chest, falling with a bloody, spluttering groan.



Another lair down.

I glance at my eat/drink inventory and make a face. Vanod must look like a giant red blob. He has 222 separate entries for blood splatters covering every inch of his body, including his tongue/mouth. At least he won't go thirsty.

I sleep for 8 hours inside of Bilbo's eviscerated corpse (and I thought he smelled bad on the outside) and awaken in the middle of the night.  Looks like lairs ARE safe to sleep in. This will make things even more painless as I march on.

Vanod is ready to continue the monster buffet.
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Gotdamnmiracle

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Re: Adventures on Monster Island
« Reply #99 on: February 23, 2012, 12:51:47 am »

How to Serve Monsters is a book 156 pages long authored by Vanod Openedfires the Awe-Inspiring Distraction. The writing is both simple and delicious.
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Go back see if he's there and run him over, and drink his gun!

MaskedMiner

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Re: Adventures on Monster Island
« Reply #100 on: February 23, 2012, 02:21:25 am »

Anaya is stupid name? .-. Well, it does sound feminine I guess for male creature... Anyhoo, yeah, random night creatures somehow manage to be either super weak or super good at using knives  :P Anyhoo, waiting for more updates :3
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Eric Blank

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Re: Adventures on Monster Island
« Reply #101 on: February 23, 2012, 03:04:53 am »

Seems like Vanod is everything unleashed from Pandora's Box wrapped up in one cruel little baastard, murdering the fuck out of a world full of otherwise completely benign settlers.

And the poor bastards didn't even see it coming.
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I make Spellcrafts!
I have no idea where anything is. I have no idea what anything does. This is not merely a madhouse designed by a madman, but a madhouse designed by many madmen, each with an intense hatred for the previous madman's unique flavour of madness.

Tastysaurus Rex

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Re: Adventures on Monster Island
« Reply #102 on: February 23, 2012, 03:29:55 am »

Seems like Vanod is everything unleashed from Pandora's Box wrapped up in one cruel little baastard, murdering the fuck out of a world full of otherwise completely benign settlers.

And the poor bastards didn't even see it coming.

Here here! In Ötstuxmon there is but one megabeast, and his name is Vanod!!!!
« Last Edit: February 23, 2012, 03:34:52 am by Tastysaurus Rex »
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That wasn't technically a miscarriage, but the doctors didn't have a concise term for "gave birth and immediately baptized the baby in liquid fire."
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Kilroy the Grand

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Re: Adventures on Monster Island
« Reply #103 on: February 23, 2012, 03:34:50 am »

Again, this thread is the best one ever. This has to be achieved.
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*pew* *blam* "Aughgghggurglegurgle..." *slither* *slither* *pit* *pat* *tap* *click-click* *BOOM* "Aiiieeegurgle gurgle..."
X-com meets Dwarf Fortress

maki32

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Re: Adventures on Monster Island
« Reply #104 on: February 23, 2012, 05:38:23 am »

This story is epic! I wish to have the world seed to generate in my DF and kills hordes and hordes of monsters!
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