I head northward. I've decided I'm gonna go over the entire island, finding every lair, and murder every monster I find. Or die trying. Probably the latter.
A rough-hewn basalt wall looms in front of me.
I climb up top but it's literally just a plateau with a black sand top, so I clamber back down and double check my compass. Ah hah. They're underneath it!
I creep forward, noticing a door inside of a little hollow in the sand. It's made of ash wood.
On a peaceful happy world such as this, no locks exist, so I walk right on in like I own the place. LOOK OUT, BILBO!
Inside, there's a bunch of toad remains in an
olivine mortar with a
smoky quartz pestle. Really quite pretty. Uh, despite the toad mush. Who the fuck mushes up toads in a mortar and pestle, seriously? Unless they have no teeth. That'd be sad. 8(
In the south is a quern made out of
pipe opal, which is also a
truly beautiful mineral. Look at that. That is some gorgeous goddamn geology, god damnit ugh it makes me so angry I gotta go eat some monsters
I head deeper in to find Mr. Bilbo Toadpaste. And not surprisingly, he's just kind of chilling out like most of these monsters seem to do on this island.
His name is Ana˙a, which I think is super dumb. So I fix it for him.
That's better.
Vanod creeps up behind him, his breath quiet, his sunken eyes wide with bloodlust.
Bilbo feels a prickle, a coldness, at the back of his neck. The glare of a predator... THE predator... is upon him
He calls out in a nervous squeak:
ha ha okay I will
Vanod calls his bluff, leaping from the shadows and stabbing right through Bilbo's leg, pinning him briefly to the floor with a soft
chuff of sand.
Bilbo manages to hit Vanod in the right foot, but it only manages to bruise Vanod's muscle. Negligible. Vanod bites back with a swing of his well-bloodied spear:
Bilbo's screams of pain make Vanod's mouth water, and he can't wait any longer.
He shakes Bilbo around like a helpless rabbit in the jaws of... a feral Vanod, spilling his filthy guts onto the sandy cavern floor. Bilbo tries feebly to bite Vanod back, but only manages to bruise Vanod's left hand slightly.
Another savage bite, and then Vanod leaps away as Bilbo tries in vain to hit him. Bilbo thrashes in his pooling blood and spilled intestines as Vanod skirts back in the shadows.
Vanod paces.
The monster is pathetic.
Pathetically DELICIOUS.
A running leap and Bilbo is skewered through the chest, falling with a bloody, spluttering groan.
Another lair down.
I glance at my eat/drink inventory and make a face. Vanod must look like a giant red blob. He has 222 separate entries for blood splatters covering every inch of his body, including his tongue/mouth. At least he won't go thirsty.
I sleep for 8 hours inside of Bilbo's eviscerated corpse (and I thought he smelled bad on the
outside) and awaken in the middle of the night. Looks like lairs ARE safe to sleep in. This will make things even more painless as I march on.
Vanod is ready to continue the monster buffet.