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[Tally]

Have this person designated as your trader when the elven caravan comes. He will buy a pig off the elves, which he will then adopt. He will then be designated to butcher this pig, AND make crafts out of its bones to sell back to the elves personally. Don't forget to have him try to sell the wooden bin they come in. He is now forgiven, if this is fulfilled.

If he is unable to buy, butcher, and sell back all within the timespan in which the caravan is still present in the fort, he has dishonored his fortress. The only acceptable punishment is death (or injury) by firing squad. Station him naked in front of an archery target at which recruits will fire, preferably with pig bone bolts. If he is not injured, that is why you built a floor hatch where he is stationed that will drop him 10z down into a 7/7 reservoir of muddy water filled with (zombie) carp when the lever is pulled. This hatch is also designated as a garbage dump. Dump any unused pig parts onto him. Justice is now served.

[Akura]

Have this person designated as your trader when the elven caravan comes. He will buy a pig off the elves, which he will then adopt. He will then be designated to butcher this pig, AND make crafts out of its bones to sell back to the elves personally. Don't forget to have him try to sell the wooden bin they come in. He is now forgiven, if this is fulfilled.

Won't work, you cannot butcher pets. Unless the owner dies, if I remember correctly.

[Tally]

Have this person designated as your trader when the elven caravan comes. He will buy a pig off the elves, which he will then adopt. He will then be designated to butcher this pig, AND make crafts out of its bones to sell back to the elves personally. Don't forget to have him try to sell the wooden bin they come in. He is now forgiven, if this is fulfilled.

Won't work, you cannot butcher pets. Unless the owner dies, if I remember correctly.

Then he just butchers the pig without adopting it.

[Henny]

Have this person designated as your trader when the elven caravan comes. He will buy a pig off the elves, which he will then adopt. He will then be designated to butcher this pig, AND make crafts out of its bones to sell back to the elves personally. Don't forget to have him try to sell the wooden bin they come in. He is now forgiven, if this is fulfilled.

Won't work, you cannot butcher pets. Unless the owner dies, if I remember correctly.

Make a tomb for the two so they can live together forever.

[greycat]

from the wiki: If a caravan has arrived at your trade depot and is unable to leave for about two months after they finished packing up their goods, the merchants and animals will go insane. This can result in a bunch of merchants attacking your dwarves, or just standing around moping until they starve to death.

Hmm.  I've never actually done this, mind you, but I can't recall ever seeing merchants eating or drinking, even when they took an extraordinarily long time to pack up and leave.  So I've been assuming that, like invaders, they never get thirsty or hungry.  (Does going insane change this, and make them start getting hungry?)

Sounds like a good science project.

[silverskull39]

from the wiki: If a caravan has arrived at your trade depot and is unable to leave for about two months after they finished packing up their goods, the merchants and animals will go insane. This can result in a bunch of merchants attacking your dwarves, or just standing around moping until they starve to death.

Hmm.  I've never actually done this, mind you, but I can't recall ever seeing merchants eating or drinking, even when they took an extraordinarily long time to pack up and leave.  So I've been assuming that, like invaders, they never get thirsty or hungry.  (Does going insane change this, and make them start getting hungry?)

Sounds like a good science project.

you just haven't kept them long enough. Typically it happens if you lock them inside when there's a siege or they dodge into and get stuck in a hole.

[Iamblichos]

Or climb a tree/cliff and forget how to climb back down...