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The

Polls

Are

Closed

[MonkeyHead]

Posting to follow the chaos with ease.

[shadenight123]

it's strange though, what mod is it that completely changes the arrival scene? >.>
second: it's obvious we have slaughtered and had sex with everything ewhich moves, no need to confirm it.

[Miggy]

Aww, I voted for Wood Elf. If we're going to mess up the entire island of Vvardenfell, we might as well troll it equally hard by being a wood elf. Try to wipe that smirk grin off our faces, dark elves.

[Stworca]

It's quite tied, and with 7 votes for moi some maniacs could be upset.

Thus, i'm reseting the vote, with the following screenshots made to help you make your choice.
I've narrowed it down to three top votes.

Here are the characters that will taint the good name, of the race you pick.

Spoiler: Nord (click to show/hide)

He's the "seen it all" heartless dick. Much like Cerdic from KA

Spoiler: Dark Elf (click to show/hide)

He's the "Care to repeat that?" angry dick.

Spoiler: Breton (click to show/hide)

He's the.. just look at him.

Imperials and Wood Elves received few votes.
Argonians.. i simply hate their animation and texture bugs. Same with Khajit (plus they're furry)
Altmers are douchebags
Orcs are too stupid.

Poll is re-set. May the favorite dick win!

[jetex1911]

Breton, because he looks like some sort of Smug-snake. I mean, look at him! He's smirking!

[shadenight123]

me must conquer the world on our CHARIOTS BRETON!

[3]

what mod is it that completely changes the arrival scene? >.>

Immersive Chargen.

[Miggy]

Breton then. And I will then forever imagine the character with an obnoxious posh british accent. "Pardon me Socucius Ergalla, could you please direct me to the closest clothesmaker so I may procure a top hat and monocle."

[KaguroDraven]

Breton then. And I will then forever imagine the character with an obnoxious posh british accent. "Pardon me Socucius Ergalla, could you please direct me to the closest clothesmaker so I may procure a top hat and monocle."

Nah, italian accent. He's roman! ALL HAIL CEASER!

[Taricus]

I'm imagining him speaking like biggus

[Burnt Pies]

Breton sounds like it's inspired by Brittany, which is an area in the north of France, so to me he's French.

[Supercharazad]

Dark elf, because that beard/mustache looks rather nice.

[NRDL]

I vote for the dark elf, because of this guy:

http://www.awkwardzombie.com/forum/viewtopic.php?f=4&t=2922&sid=c86da65c6677446364b0c0afac022486

[Stworca]

Intro Part 2

Spoiler: Vote Result (click to show/hide)

11 : 8 : 7 for This Guy

Spoiler: Our "Hero" (click to show/hide)

Let me see..



Yes, everything seems to be in order. Can i go now?


Why do you insist on wasting more of my time, you pr--- i'll get paid? Tell me where to go!
Guard : This way, you need some clothes first.


No wonder the Imperial City is in ruins, if they PAY their prisoners. I wouldn't pay my prisoners for sure. They would work for me until They tire, and then work some more!


Wait.. what am i saying? I wouldn't ever imprison anyone, i'd kill them instead.


Why am i even standing in this line? These barbarians are unwashed!


You there, let me through, There is a pile of gold with my name on it! I can't wait here, with these mongrels.


Now wait just a minut-- ughh..


..motherfu-- *knocked out*


..no, please Mother, i don't want to go to a-.. whaa-- what is going o--


What the..


..i'm tripping balls! It must have been the rotten meal we ate on the ship.


YOU!? What the hell are you doing here?!


I see You've stacked a pile of chairs..  You have serious problems.


One of them is an angry, molested s.o.b. Me.


Don't worry about the pain.. You'll get used to i-- uh-- what the--


..It was a dream? Or am i.. dreaming right now?


Dream within a dream? Ha! What a ridiculous idea.
Guard : All right, it's your turn now.


Prisoner : Are you all right?
Actually, i'm not. Me being calm and forgiving? It's just an act. I'm raging on the inside, and will take it all out on the first person that gives me a reason to do so. I suggest you point your filthy armpit at someone else.


Gerald : Stop threatening people and take your dirty rags clothes.

Spoiler: Can't we all.. (click to show/hide)

What is it now? I have my damn clothes!


Guard : What?! Do you remember the details?
There is an infected imperial woman, by the name of Alexia on the CWC Kvatch ship.
Guard : And she bit you?
Aye, let me show you *pulls the pants down*
Guard : Empire damn you, you fil-- oh.. she DID bite you! Here, take these cure disease potions.
Good.. Make sure to pass a word to the authorities! Oh, what is it now? Another waiting room!?


Guard! Do you mind letting me through? I'm surely the best looking prisoner in this room.


Now, where is my gold!? Do you have my gold?


Speak up! Do you know who i am?
Clagius : An unarmed, foul mouthed prisoner?
..Touche. Here are my papers.


Imagine the things i can buy with that much gold! Guard! Let me through, i have slaves to buy, castles to build, kings to bribe!


Guard : Yes, in your dreams. Let me open this gate, so that you can get los-- what is going on there?!
Guard 2 : It appears that the prisoners are fighting.
You don't say.. Let me through.
Guard : Not until it's resolved.


I'm sick of waiting. You're GUARDS, and They don't respect your authority!
Guard : You're right! Let's kill them!
I did good!
Now.. You there, Balllickus Bookkepperus! You have a door back there, let me through.


What?! Do i look like a troublemaker?! No! Don't drop the portcullis!



I guess i'll just open the gate myself.. Let's see.. Yes, there is enough room for me to squeeze through..


..there we go..  Now, what is going o--


I just cannot get bored, now can i?

Oh, right..
CWC means Crappy Wooden Construction.

[Basque]

Ha!  I have no idea how the game is supposed to open normally but it seems like this is changed a lot. I'm going to try and see if I can guess at what's modded without actually having played the game before. For instance, I laughed at the "criminal scum" reference, that's one of the few things I know just by hearsay.

I also laughed at some of your other lines, in particular off the top of my head I thought the buying Kingdoms with 85 gold comment was funny. XD I think you do a good job of doing short lines in character like you have been, and with the accompanying screenshots a short line is really all you need. I will have to try and read some other stuff for some OOC information though; I'm looking forward to learning some of the mechanics and such of the game.

Thanks for the update, Stworca! It's definitely an interesting start for the LP! ^^