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Author Topic: Could someone explain... The thread where we muse over what causes certain wtfs.  (Read 474943 times)

Torrenal

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Why am I not known as the King of Hell? Can I get a serious answer?
Probably not, though others are welcome to try.

Thing is, there is no king of hell.  He died.

You can't ascend to king however, because he left some heirs.  Some several thousand heirs (some demons breed more than others).  These various princes are currently vying to ascend to the throne.
Now, to become king of hell, you can either wait for them to settle on a new king... (sit back and relax, they've been at it for twelve-hundred years) or you can kill all the heirs, and their kin, and their kin's kin's kin.
That might take a while.


Why is it the broker who is issued no other jobs, can be standing on the trading depot, and still be on break for several days and unwilling to trade?
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Max™

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Part of the job of a broker is to waste time so lethal foes can sneak into the fort while the gates are open.

Also, uh, I'm pretty sure Some Aussie Dude is the king of hell.

What was their name again?
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Dozebôm Lolumzalìs

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ThatAussieGuy?

Why do dwarves want to conquer hell?
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Quote from: King James Programming
...Simplification leaves us with the black extra-cosmic gulfs it throws open before our frenzied eyes...
Quote from: Salvané Descocrates
The only difference between me and a fool is that I know that I know only that I think, therefore I am.
Sigtext!

cochramd

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ThatAussieGuy?

Why do dwarves want to conquer hell?
There's nothing else interesting to do in end game.

How do we make end game more interesting?
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Insert_Gnome_Here has claimed a computer terminal!

(Don't hold your breath though. I'm sitting here with a {x Windows Boot Manager x} hoping I do not go bezerk.)

Dozebôm Lolumzalìs

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Whatever's in those creepy "bottomless" pits.

What's in those pits?
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Quote from: King James Programming
...Simplification leaves us with the black extra-cosmic gulfs it throws open before our frenzied eyes...
Quote from: Salvané Descocrates
The only difference between me and a fool is that I know that I know only that I think, therefore I am.
Sigtext!

Bumber

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Whatever's in those creepy "bottomless" pits.

What's in those pits?
The damned souls of murderous dwarves and restless spirits of nobles.

Urist McRevenantNoble mandates meat coffins.

How do you dispose of a haunting noble from hell?
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Reading his name would trigger it. Thinking of him would trigger it. No other circumstances would trigger it- it was strictly related to the concept of Bill Clinton entering the conscious mind.

THE xTROLL FUR SOCKx RUSE WAS A........... DISTACTION        the carp HAVE the wagon

A wizard has turned you into a wagon. This was inevitable (Y/y)?

Dozebôm Lolumzalìs

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A slab from hell: an adamantine or slade memorial.  Only way to satisfy them.

Why can dwarves dig slade when it explicitly states: NO_DIGGERING or something?
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Quote from: King James Programming
...Simplification leaves us with the black extra-cosmic gulfs it throws open before our frenzied eyes...
Quote from: Salvané Descocrates
The only difference between me and a fool is that I know that I know only that I think, therefore I am.
Sigtext!

TheBiggerFish

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They exploit the laws of the universe.
Alternatively, sheer beardiness.

How come the demons don't just run away?
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Sigtext

It has been determined that Trump is an average unladen swallow travelling northbound at his maximum sustainable speed of -3 Obama-cubits per second in the middle of a class 3 hurricane.

Dozebôm Lolumzalìs

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The same way the dwarves don't give up.

Why do my dwarves care if a couple troglodytes died? Seriously, this one dwarf is stressed just from seeing some trog corpses. (Well, and a few humans and dorfs died to a hydra, but that's completely beside the matter.)
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Quote from: King James Programming
...Simplification leaves us with the black extra-cosmic gulfs it throws open before our frenzied eyes...
Quote from: Salvané Descocrates
The only difference between me and a fool is that I know that I know only that I think, therefore I am.
Sigtext!

Dunamisdeos

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How dead? Like, stabbed in the chest dead, or mangled limbs to death dead? Everything is relative when it comes to the viewing of horrific injury, let me tell you.
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FACT I: Post note art is best art.
FACT II: Dunamisdeos is a forum-certified wordsmith.
FACT III: "All life begins with Post-it notes and ends with Post-it notes. This is the truth! This is my belief!...At least for now."
FACT IV: SPEECHO THE TRUSTWORM IS YOUR FRIEND or BEHOLD: THE FRUIT ENGINE 3.0

Nep Nep

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How come Dwarves are easily placated after the death of family members if you just give them a ton of masterwork food, and other things and they don't really care after their family member died?
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Waluigi rushes to aid him, but not before warning Bowser, "Don't expect mouth-to-mouth!"

Torrenal

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It's not the masterwork food, it's the pills t he cook slips into it.

Why does it take breaching the caverns to get an underground tree-farm moving?
//Torrenal
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Insert_Gnome_Here

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To let the cavern spores into the fort.

Why can ballista arrows only be turned around by firing?
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Quote from: Max™ on December 06, 2015, 04:09:21 am
Also, if you ever figure out why poets/bards/dancers just randomly start butchering people/getting butchered, please don't fix it, I love never knowing when a dance party will turn into a slaughter.

Knit tie

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Why bother?  You don't need to turn them around unless you're firing them.

Why do my poets and scholars only ever write 1-page works?
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NESgamer190

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They be surprisingly efficient writers!

Why are the crossbow goblins that are lying siege to my fort just sitting in the territory border?
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