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Author Topic: dwarven puns  (Read 12109 times)

flieroflight

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dwarven puns
« on: June 02, 2011, 01:43:19 am »
so basically,  post any and all puns, horrendus jokes, and other rotten humor in this thread.
ill start off
I gave a nether-cap bed to my axedwarf wh slew a dragon. why? cause he's a pretty cool guy.
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Quote from: Hanslanda on May 09, 2012, 08:53:07 pm
Bay12 doesn't have moral event horizons, it has goals.

da_nang

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Re: dwarven puns
« Reply #1 on: June 02, 2011, 02:29:45 am »
I'm pretty sure there are a lot of puns involving stones and ores. Very gneiss, I suppose.
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Ceterum censeo Unionem Europaeam esse delendam.
Quote from: NRDL on September 29, 2012, 04:44:31 am
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Acperience

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Re: dwarven puns
« Reply #2 on: June 02, 2011, 04:12:23 am »
I'll try to dig one up.

Urist McA: I once saw a ghost start a party.
Urist McB: That's a lode of schist.

Urist McMessenger: My Lord! All the dwarfs who embarked at the Armorcrest fortress have perished!
Noble: By Armok's bloody beard! Andesite?

What do you call half an Up Ramp?
a microcline
« Last Edit: June 02, 2011, 04:14:05 am by Acperience »
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Agent_86

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Re: dwarven puns
« Reply #3 on: June 02, 2011, 04:24:26 am »
Just found this on the wiki...

Quote
It has been suggested by some that diced Rhesus Macaque meat cooked with dwarven syrup is used for a tasty dwarven candy, or Rhesus Pieces.
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When something isn't quite dorfy enough, just add magma.

Syrup Roast

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Re: dwarven puns
« Reply #4 on: June 02, 2011, 07:43:36 am »
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Quote from: Necro910 on June 07, 2011, 11:48:49 am
My answer to just about everything is magma. In fact, most threads end up with me running in screaming it 

Angel Of Death

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Re: dwarven puns
« Reply #5 on: June 02, 2011, 07:47:54 am »
Did 'ye hear about the story of the dragon that was beaten to death with it's OWN egg?

Yeah, I guess the dragon had...  8)

Egg on it's face...

YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!
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99 percent of internet users add useless, pulled out of arse statistics to their sig. If you are the 1%, please, for the love of Armok, don't put any useless shit like this in your sig.
Hidden signature messages are fun!

Crazy Cow

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Re: dwarven puns
« Reply #6 on: June 02, 2011, 07:51:53 am »
Where does a midget keep his silverware?
A dwarf fork-rest!
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flieroflight

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Re: dwarven puns
« Reply #7 on: June 02, 2011, 08:17:22 am »
i think we've been taking this humor for granite.
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Quote from: Hanslanda on May 09, 2012, 08:53:07 pm
Bay12 doesn't have moral event horizons, it has goals.

Angel Of Death

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Re: dwarven puns
« Reply #8 on: June 02, 2011, 09:04:04 am »
Quote from: flieroflight on June 02, 2011, 08:17:22 am
i think we've been taking this humor for granite.
Don't talk that schist here! You're mica me mad!
« Last Edit: June 02, 2011, 09:06:45 am by Angel Of Death »
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99 percent of internet users add useless, pulled out of arse statistics to their sig. If you are the 1%, please, for the love of Armok, don't put any useless shit like this in your sig.
Hidden signature messages are fun!

The Merchant Of Menace

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Re: dwarven puns
« Reply #9 on: June 02, 2011, 09:07:54 am »
Did you hear about the fort that gave all their stone to the traders?
Yeah, they gave them the chert off their back
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*Hugs*

jaxy15

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Re: dwarven puns
« Reply #10 on: June 02, 2011, 09:39:55 am »
"Listen, Urist McMason! We have tons of stone available for making those cabinets! Do I have to seriously talc (That's a stone) you into making them?!"
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Quote from: JJtoocool on October 23, 2011, 01:29:43 am
Dwarf Fortress: Threats of metabolism.

evileeyore

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Re: dwarven puns
« Reply #11 on: June 02, 2011, 11:11:36 am »
Quote from: Angel Of Death on June 02, 2011, 07:47:54 am
Did 'ye hear about the story of the dragon that was beaten to death with it's OWN egg?

Yeah, I guess the dragon had...  8)

Egg on it's face...

YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!

My fort recently had a series of deaths attributed to a rampaging turkey.

It was..

Murder most fowl!

YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!


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Ledi

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Re: dwarven puns
« Reply #12 on: June 02, 2011, 12:10:02 pm »
Quote from: evileeyore on June 02, 2011, 11:11:36 am
Spoiler (click to show/hide)

...That image scares me and amuses me at the same time.
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Quote from: ThatAussieGuy on July 18, 2012, 01:28:32 am
So Ledi's been training the cats into an army of disposable warbeasts?  Why did no-one think of this sooner?!
Quote from: EmeraldWind on August 31, 2012, 10:28:18 pm
Hellcannon seemed to be constantly on the verge of death and Levergedon before my turn helped, but ultimately what killed it was Ledi's cat army.

Necro910

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Re: dwarven puns
« Reply #13 on: June 02, 2011, 12:11:21 pm »
Quote from: Ledi on June 02, 2011, 12:10:02 pm
Quote from: evileeyore on June 02, 2011, 11:11:36 am
Spoiler (click to show/hide)

...That image scares me and amuses me at the same time.
When you look into the image, the image looks into you.

Knowing dwarves and their relationship with cats, I don't think you want that to happen.
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Ledi

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Re: dwarven puns
« Reply #14 on: June 02, 2011, 12:32:26 pm »
Quote from: Necro910 on June 02, 2011, 12:11:21 pm
Quote from: Ledi on June 02, 2011, 12:10:02 pm
Quote from: evileeyore on June 02, 2011, 11:11:36 am
Spoiler (click to show/hide)

...That image scares me and amuses me at the same time.
When you look into the image, the image looks into you.

Knowing dwarves and their relationship with cats, I don't think you want that to happen.

I also kind of wonder how he keeps those on, not having ears or anything.

Then I remember: Magma. He probably melts them to his head.
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Quote from: ThatAussieGuy on July 18, 2012, 01:28:32 am
So Ledi's been training the cats into an army of disposable warbeasts?  Why did no-one think of this sooner?!
Quote from: EmeraldWind on August 31, 2012, 10:28:18 pm
Hellcannon seemed to be constantly on the verge of death and Levergedon before my turn helped, but ultimately what killed it was Ledi's cat army.
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