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[Devling]

I think Taiwan is fucked?

[MetalSlimeHunt]

Apparently there are major weekly protests going on in my city, and I didn't know about it. I need to get out more.

[Drakale]

today i were told an asteroid something 300 meters big will take part in gravitational shenanigans in 2036 and blast taiwan's shit 5-8 months later yet the one who mentioned it was absurdly casual about the whole matter and instead of saying something about stopping this started teaching me how gravity, orbits and such work while answering many a question of mine, and they claimed they're taking me all the way throooooough though i have no idea where their competences end and if their data isn't outdated badly

so yeah. there's that.

By 2036 Bruce Willis will be 81 years old and If he could take out one the size of Texas at 50 I doubt a lousy 300 meter long rock would impress him even then, I wouldn't worry too much.

[Nadaka]

The closest asteroid I know about fitting that is Apophis, a ~600m long x 300m wide asteroid. It will have a close flyby in 2029 and most likely more distant flyby in 2036. 2029 will be a miss by at least 20000 km, 2036 will most likely be a miss by over 14 million km (but impact isn't ruled out completely). In any case, it would be impossible to identify the precise impact location this far out.

[MetalSlimeHunt]

In 2002 Apophis was news because it got a 2.6% chance of impact, but as of now the impact risk has become so negligible as to be zero.

[misko27]

today i were told an asteroid something 300 meters big will take part in gravitational shenanigans in 2036 and blast taiwan's shit 5-8 months later yet the one who mentioned it was absurdly casual about the whole matter and instead of saying something about stopping this started teaching me how gravity, orbits and such work while answering many a question of mine, and they claimed they're taking me all the way throooooough though i have no idea where their competences end and if their data isn't outdated badly

so yeah. there's that.

Err, what? Jesus son, where is your Grammer? A Semi-colon might make that entire sentence a little more palatable.


try this:

Today I was told an asteroid, of about 300 meters in diameter, will take part in gravitational shenanigans in 2036 and blast Taiwan's shit 5-8 months later; yet the one who mentioned it was absurdly casual about the whole matter and instead of continuing on this, possibly about stopping this unfortunate event, started teaching me how gravity, orbits and such work while answering many a question of mine; And they claimed they're taking me all the way through the information, although I have no idea what is the scope of their competence and/or if their data isn't badly out of dateSo yeah. There's that.

Fix'd, I think.

[Truean]

http://news.yahoo.com/kenyan-officials-seize-ivory-disguised-peanuts-142215226.html

I don't even. Wait, let me get this straight, you guys disguised pieces of elephants as food elephants like...? You sick bastards.

What would you disguise smuggled leather as? Grass?

[Xantalos]

http://news.yahoo.com/kenyan-officials-seize-ivory-disguised-peanuts-142215226.html

I don't even. Wait, let me get this straight, you guys disguised pieces of elephants as food elephants like...? You sick bastards.

What would you disguise smuggled leather as? Grass?

Pants.

[Truean]

http://news.yahoo.com/kenyan-officials-seize-ivory-disguised-peanuts-142215226.html

I don't even. Wait, let me get this straight, you guys disguised pieces of elephants as food elephants like...? You sick bastards.

What would you disguise smuggled leather as? Grass?

Pants.

Jackets.

Are pants and jackets food cows like to eat?

[Chink]

http://news.yahoo.com/kenyan-officials-seize-ivory-disguised-peanuts-142215226.html

I don't even. Wait, let me get this straight, you guys disguised pieces of elephants as food elephants like...? You sick bastards.

What would you disguise smuggled leather as? Grass?

Pants.

Jackets.

Are pants and jackets food cows like to eat?

No, but pants and jackets can be made out of leather without suspicion. It's like this story.

[Truean]

http://news.yahoo.com/kenyan-officials-seize-ivory-disguised-peanuts-142215226.html

I don't even. Wait, let me get this straight, you guys disguised pieces of elephants as food elephants like...? You sick bastards.

What would you disguise smuggled leather as? Grass?

Pants.

Jackets.

Are pants and jackets food cows like to eat?

No, but pants and jackets can be made out of leather without suspicion. It's like this story.

I thought elephant parts were to peanuts as cow parts were to grass?

[Chink]

http://news.yahoo.com/kenyan-officials-seize-ivory-disguised-peanuts-142215226.html

I don't even. Wait, let me get this straight, you guys disguised pieces of elephants as food elephants like...? You sick bastards.

What would you disguise smuggled leather as? Grass?

Pants.

Jackets.

Are pants and jackets food cows like to eat?

No, but pants and jackets can be made out of leather without suspicion. It's like this story.

I thought elephant parts were to peanuts as cow parts were to grass?

Yes, but I doubt the smugglers chose to disguise the ivory as peanuts because elephants like to eat them. It's more likely they chose peanuts because they didn't think anybody would spend much time investigating crates of peanuts.

[Scelly9]

I just noticed I have gigantic bruises on my arms. Ow.

[Truean]

http://news.yahoo.com/kenyan-officials-seize-ivory-disguised-peanuts-142215226.html

I don't even. Wait, let me get this straight, you guys disguised pieces of elephants as food elephants like...? You sick bastards.

What would you disguise smuggled leather as? Grass?

Pants.

Jackets.

Are pants and jackets food cows like to eat?

No, but pants and jackets can be made out of leather without suspicion. It's like this story.

I thought elephant parts were to peanuts as cow parts were to grass?

Yes, but I doubt the smugglers chose to disguise the ivory as peanuts because elephants like to eat them. It's more likely they chose peanuts because they didn't think anybody would spend much time investigating crates of peanuts.

Well, ok but you've gotta admit.... They could've disguised them as something else, lots of other things with the same motivation of avoiding detection. Of all things, peanuts? Elephants... peanuts...?

[Chink]

http://news.yahoo.com/kenyan-officials-seize-ivory-disguised-peanuts-142215226.html

I don't even. Wait, let me get this straight, you guys disguised pieces of elephants as food elephants like...? You sick bastards.

What would you disguise smuggled leather as? Grass?

Pants.

Jackets.

Are pants and jackets food cows like to eat?

No, but pants and jackets can be made out of leather without suspicion. It's like this story.

I thought elephant parts were to peanuts as cow parts were to grass?

Yes, but I doubt the smugglers chose to disguise the ivory as peanuts because elephants like to eat them. It's more likely they chose peanuts because they didn't think anybody would spend much time investigating crates of peanuts.

Well, ok but you've gotta admit.... They could've disguised them as something else, lots of other things with the same motivation of avoiding detection. Of all things, peanuts? Elephants... peanuts...?

Yeah, they could have chosen something else, but I'm glad they didn't. It seems to have gotten them caught, and it's also made the whole story quite funny.