Almost had a major accident on the way home from work today. Granted, I was going over the speed limit, but that's no excuse for the other driver having exactly zero fucking ability to gauge the speed of oncoming traffic. I watched this stupid bitch in a minivan from 3 blocks away, knowing she might do something dumb. And then, at about half a block away, she inched her stupid, fat fucking ass into my lane, so I had to jink almost into on-coming traffic to avoid her. Almost like she thought on-coming traffic is supposed to slow down and eventually stop because she is too goddamn stupid and/or nervous to drive like a someone who has a clue what they're doing.
Then I watched her in my rearview mirror while she sat there a moment half in the lane, before she trundled her dumb ass back out of the intersection. Did she use the gigantic window of space after me to complete her turn? No. Did she use the time she had prior to me getting near her to complete her turn? FUCKING NO.
It's comforting to know that all the biological and physiological adaptations that we humans have developed over the centuries to survive are steadily coming to mean fucking NOTHING in the modern age. Or, as chmod once famously said "If these people were alive 2,000 years ago they would have been eaten by lions." In my mind, I imagine her sitting there with her fucking face buried in a goddamn phone before she completed her text message, looked up and went "I'm going now, good luck everybody, and fuck you because I'm the only one on the road that fucking matters."
If *I* drove like that, her ass would be would splattered against her passenger side door right now.