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[wallie79r]

So, my friend was wandering around and decided to ask a random dwarf about his family. We became intrigued at this dwarf when he informed us that one of his cousins is also his uncle. It was quickly determined that this isn't actually possible by conventional genaeology, so we continued to ask him about his family. Over time, we have determined that:
He has at least 3 other uncles who were also cousins.
His mother is also his cousin.
His maternal grandmother is also his aunt.
As we were unveiling this sordid tapestry of lust and depravity, an even darker thread became known. A disproportionate number of his children, at least 5 out of 8 that he's told us about, were killed by a Titan going by the name of The Waxy Mist. This was intriguing, but then he saw fit to inform us that his 6th eldest daughter, the only child we know of who isn't dead, worships the Waxy Mist. Even worse, his wife began worshipping the Waxy Mist about 12 years before she married him. Now, the only way this can be interpreted is that there's an extended clan of dwarves so inbred that their family tree can only be portrayed in four dimensions who, in order to appease the mighty titan that lives near them, give it a constant supply of delicious, bearded children. The fact that his only surviving daughter is also the only one who worships the Waxy Mist supports this theory. Finally, one of his other cousins is also the king of a civilization going by the name of the Spines-Chambers of Ash. I'm scared now.

[Canalan]

I can hear the banjos.

[darkflagrance]

The father married the daughter of one of his male siblings, which he had four of. We shall call the father of the dwarf's mother f2.

f2's wife was the daughter of one of his sisters.

[Acanthus117]

I can hear the banjos.

Don't forget the accent!

[Canalan]

Your adventurer had better be a damn good archer. 

[Acanthus117]

Hey, they should embark near a volcano and start the Esoteric order of Armok.

[CrossBolt]

DON'T DIG TOO DEEP OR WE'LL DELVE IN THE 9001st DIMENSION!

It hurts, please don't ask anymore family members...please?

[Bricks]

Hey, they should embark near a volcano and start the Esoteric order of Armok.

Cthulu fhtagn, indeed.

[Acanthus117]

Hehe, but they would interbreed with Firemen instead of fishies.

[Iapetus]

Sounds like:

Charles II was the last Habsburg King of Spain... He is noted for his extensive physical, intellectual, and emotional problems – along with the consequent ineffectual rule – as well as his role in the developments preceding the War of the Spanish Succession.

The ancestry of Charles II of Spain:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:Carlos_segundo80.png


Dating to approximately the year 1550, outbreeding in Charles II's lineage had ceased. From then on, all his ancestors were in one way or another descendants of Joanna the Mad () and Philip I of Castile, and among these just the royal houses of Spain, Austria and Bavaria. Charles II's genome was more homozygous than in an average brother-sister offspring.[2] He was born physically and mentally disabled, and disfigured. Possibly through affliction with mandibular prognathism, he was unable to chew. His tongue was so large that his speech could barely be understood, and he frequently drooled.



Edited: for some reason the image of the familly tree web wouldn't display, so I've put a stantart link in instead.

[truckman1]

Wow, so even before the 100+ years of 100% inbreeding started (mind you, before that they probably kept to an average level of inbreeding for nobility at the time) the one woman they are all descended from WAS ALREADY CRAZY TO BEGIN WITH?

Wow, anyone else now picturing Charles II spending his time sitting on his throne, mumbling out orders to to have the blacksmith be hammered three times because he failed to fill out his mandate of 3 toy forges?

[Deimos56]

Habsburg

Ah, yes, these guys. Didn't they have a jaw disorder named after them?
They ruled a lot more than Spain though. Found a delightful list of their longest-lasting titles.

    * King of the Romans
    * Holy Roman Emperors
    * Rulers of Austria (as Dukes 1282–1453, Archdukes)
    * Kings of Bohemia (1306–1307, 1437–1439, 1453–1457, 1526–1918),
    * Kings of Hungary and Croatia (1437–1439, 1445–1457, 1526–1918),
    * Kings of Spain (1516–1700),
    * Kings of Portugal (1580–1640),
    * Kings of Galicia and Lodomeria (1772–1918), and
    * Grand Princes of Transylvania (1690–1867).

...Apparently one of them spent about 3 years as emperor of mexico too. Most of the branches of the family seem to have annihilated themselves via inbreeding between cousins by the 18th century, but they didn't lose power altogether until WWI.

Then again, I'm just skimming through wikipedia and bored.