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[Dozebôm Lolumzalìs]

Haha! that's all funny. Except for the blood waterfalls, that actually sounds like Armok if I didn't know better.

Thanks. You didn't actually trigger it, Tawa, it was floating around in my brain for a while.

Yeah, there are more feminine things about me than "doesn't like sports" and "wouldn't actually mind being female"! If that were the case, I wouldn't have felt that way. I just can't think of them all off the top of my head, and they're more additive than "this one thing makes me feel feminine".

Thanks for the replies, everybody. It's nice to be reassured of things like "gender doesn't actually really matter" and such. I knew it, but I can hardly reassure myself (unless I'm hallucinating, in which case - good job, me!!)

I suppose half of what I am is a geek, heh. Geeks don't fit many of the male stereotypes.

By gender stereotypes I do not mean "hunky guy lazily watching TV while lifting 200000-lb weight" or such. I mean things that would make somebody think "hey, that's girly" or "seems a bit masculine." Because almost everything in life can be related to one gender or another. And that means that when I do something, it feels like I'm "doing something girly"? I don't knowm I'm still a bit confused about it.

I think the whole "am i trans? what is trans? WHAT IS LIFE HOW DO I KNOW WHAT IS IS WHAT IS NOT" part was 2 parts me freaking out, 1 part not actually having a way to tell, and 1/4 parts idle curiosity. I'm fairly sure I'm not trans. And that's just as okay as if I were. (tbh, though, I'd really rather not be discriminated against, so this whole cis straight male middle-class thing is working pretty well for me.)

But I'm over it all now! Thanks again, I can go back to happily (and somewhat snobbily ) ignoring gender. And being fine with parts of me that people could call "masculine" or "feminine".

[Skyrunner]

Got a fancy expensive phone (Galaxy S7), turns out it's completely locked down chipset so I can't install google apps, which this phone does not come with because China.

Now I'll have to go through the refund process, if it's even refundable since I already opened it

[Mephansteras]

-snip-

Just remember, most things that are 'masculine' and 'feminine' are cultural rather than innate. French noblemen in the 1700's wore wigs, high heels, makeup, perfume, jewelry, and clothing that showed off their legs. Viking warriors in medieval times were considered problematic because so many women fancied them over local men for doing crazy things like 'bathing regularly' and 'taking care of their personal appearance'.

The whole gender identity thing is really only problematic if you're actual uncomfortable with your body being the sex it is. Otherwise, who cares? Just be you.

[Tawa]

You didn't actually trigger it, Tawa, it was floating around in my brain for a while.

Alright, I just kinda figured since you posted it after I vocally noticed the change... :v

Anywho, good for you!

[Spehss _]

Slept like complete shiiiiiit last night. Was really tired all day yesterday, meant to go to sleep earlier, didn't, laid down to sleep about half-an-hour past midnight, couldn't actually fall asleep until sometime past 3. I actually got out of bed and laid on a couch instead, and actually fell asleep there.

It amazes me how I can be extremely tired and yet I have so much difficulty actually going to sleep.

[itisnotlogical]

I wanted to use an MikuMikuDance model to make an animation in Blender. As it happens, models specifically designed for one program tend to have problems in another program, but it's usually something reasonably correctable. Not so in this case. The mesh is fixable, it just has a lot of extra geometry for the way MMD does anime-style facial expressions. However, the rig is totally fucked beyond usability. Each bone (upper arm, lower arm, etc) has its vertices split among 4 or so smaller bones, which have completely wrong orientation and modifiers to make it appear normal... all of which add render time and headaches down the road as I try to modify the rig into something resembling a standard IK humanoid.

I mean, I could spend a week or two and create multiple models myself, if I just abandon all my responsibilities and seclude myself. And that is why I can hardly ever accomplish anything creative anymore.

[Solifuge]

Missed this earlier. TL;DR, be yourself; live, and speak, and act, and dress, and have whatever body you would prefer.

Gender and Gender Roles are entirely a fabrication of society; a tool that maximized population growth and preserved maximum reproductive capacity in a culture in the days of high mortality, by risking men more than women. They are as learned as a recipe, or how to speak Spanish, though equally real. Gender Roles are historically linked to sexes, but we're slowly getting over that bias; there's less judgement when Males (particularly but not strictly gay or bi ones) "act girly", or when Women are "one of the guys" these days. With medicine, preserving population growth against high mortality rates isn't a concern the same way either.

Sex is biological, and many people consider it more "real" or "concrete" than gender. We can use medicine to change some aspects of physical sex, but don't yet have extensive control over biological sex. However, all animals (us included) have the hardware for selecting and expressing as either sex; we're starting to find the genes that control an individual's sex, which some animal species use to completely change it even after reaching adulthood as that sex. When we learn how these genes and mechanisms work, it's very likely that one's biological sex could be just as arbitrary and optional as gender, or as dying your hair.

That said: I'd encourage you to define how you want to behave for yourself, rather than letting millennia-old social engineering like Gender Roles decide for you. Many folks are still going to be confused if your sex doesn't match your clothes, behavor, or gender; if you would honestly prefer being physically more like a different sex to any degree, and don't mind the present limitations of medicine and biological science to change that, there's absolutely no harm in that either. I don't see any reason a Male can't be a Gal, or a Female can't be a Guy; I think history won't either.

EDIT: fixed things. Phone formatting, yo.

[Rolan7]

Tonight I'm presenting on another exciting special rush-project I've been working on all today and yesterday.  Which is great, normally I'd be pretty euphoric...  Except tomorrow I'm visiting my mom and brother for a few days.  The trip anxiety has really screwed up my work, as usual.  I would bail, but she's having a really rough time and I promised her a month ago.  And she already payed for everything...

This is it though, last time, not making any more such promises.

bluh, I woke up after like 2 hours and couldn't go back to sleep.  This presentation is going to suck, I basically failed despite spending a lot of time on it.  I just can't concentrate, too anxious.

This failure could actually have some significant consequences, too.  Shitty timing...  Guess I'll brave a nap and see if I find an insight afterwards.

[i2amroy]

However, all animals (us included) have the hardware for selecting and expressing as either sex; we're starting to find the genes that control an individual's sex, which some animal species use to completely change it even after reaching adulthood as that sex. When we learn how these genes and mechanisms work, it's very likely that one's biological sex could be just as arbitrary and optional as gender, or as dying your hair.

Well we already know the largest component by far (i.e. XX vs XY), the problem is mostly that it's such an integral part of a person that it would take extreme technology to be able to swap it out without, you know, killing whoever you wanted to swap it on first. Its like if some people were born with brass skeletons and others with normal ones; even if we could make a viable transplant brass skeleton it would be rather difficult to swap out the old bone one without killing you in several different during ways the process. Instead it would be much more feasible just to graft brass onto a normal person's existing skeleton, which is essentially what we are doing with sex reassignment surgery.

The reason why it's easy for some animals to change sexes throughout the course of their lifetime is because those animals actually have both sets of chromosomes at birth (i.e. they have some XX cells and some XY cells [or their appropriate matching concept for things like the ZW system, etc.]) and they simply only express on or the other at any given point in time (which is where all the other genes tend to play a part). Humans aren't built like that though, so while you could hypothetically construct a missing chromosome from the person's one you wish to remove, such technology is currently far beyond us. Much more likely we will develop surgical procedures to the point of essentially rebuilding/transplanting the missing pieces (essentially frankensteining you into your desired sex) long before we ever get the ability to actually change your genetic makeup to your desired physical sex (which is, of course, not to say that it won't ever happen, just that it's a lot farther away than a lot of people think).

This of course doesn't really have any influence on the discussion about gender, but I just felt like I couldn't help but inject some science into some forecasts.

[Solifuge]

I think you're thinking of pathogenesis and self-cloning? I was actually talking about a family of genes we've been studying since the mid 00's, that create and maintain sex characteristics, hormone production, and gonad function. X and Y genes do act on them, but they're the mechanism that actually creates and maintains sex in dimorphic critters like us, and which let some creatures change it on the fly.

A lot of the genes mentioned here are involved, though other research has been ongoing for about a decade. A few PopSci pieces on DMTR1 or FOXL2 knockout might also make for interesting reading? Research papers are probably better sources, but a bit more laser focused on the inner workings of mouse or fish genitals. o.o;

[chaotic skies]

The majority of my friends are assholes, and when I hang out with my friends that actually aren't assholes (the ones I like to hangout with), the assholes tell me to stop flirting and get a life ;_;

Can't even get new friends, because I'm incredibly good at making enemies on accident. I also loose all illusion of control when I'm angry, and although very few people can actually make me angry, I don't cool down for hours and just make more enemies ;_;

Send help >_<

[TheBiggerFish]

If they're assholes and you don't like hanging out with them, DON'T.

[i2amroy]

If they're assholes and you don't like hanging out with them, DON'T.

Yeah, life isn't worth wasting on those that you don't like being around (unless the payoff for that is later being able to do things that you would like more and wouldn't be able to do elsewise, which is the only reason why work isn't considered insanity ).

[miauw62]

Why the fuck do I still have a crush on a girl who I know isn't interested in me? It's been three months, and it's still making me miserable. Then again, apparently I'm not even worth being clear to about these things.

[chaotic skies]

You're worth it Miau, you really are. Just because people either don't know how they feel about you, or don't know how to tell you, doesn't mean you're not worth it.
Fish: I don't actually even come near them most of the time, but they end up finding a way to talk to me and be total fuckheads about everything I do.