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[Spehss _]

Pretty sure I am sick. Nose is running constantly, throat hurts like hell and is not helped by mucus running down my throat, head hurts, literally did not sleep at all last night.

I hope this clears up in a day or two. I don't want to get behind in college work because of a stupid cold.

[hops]

Yeah I'm censoring myself before Toady ban me.

[TheBiggerFish]

@Cinder:....aaa I can't tell you you're wrong without inadvertently providing evidence and aaaaaaaa

But seriously, Cin, you're smart.

[hops]

Yeah I'm censoring myself before Toady ban me.

[TempAcc]

Wat

[Tiruin]

Spoiler: @Gamedragon (click to show/hide)

Hopelessness is cyclic in nature. Any attitude that becomes something to enact, and something a person acts upon, depends on persistence and consistency of whatever influences it, which can range from external/outside factors--family, school, academics, and the perception to any of these--and combined with internal/inside/personal factors such as one's own feelings, thoughts, and the concepts/ideas they have towards anything external or internal.

In situations like yours--it is best to focus and be consistent with facing and seeking help, rather than focus on thoughts that you feel when feeling attacked (or likewise any mood that has you feeling very bad, that you feel like doing something drastic about it. One's mood is a major influence to any further interaction). What's happening in what may be going on is a linear path of thinking about facing your concerns or problems, and the follow-up seems to be leading to self-harm, which shouldn't be where anything goes (self-harm relies on the idea that 'others may notice what I'm doing, THEN they'll act', which pushes the idea of passive interference, as in "they must act on observing something they can see"...which doesn't need to be any idea of self-harm, just because what's driving it is a learned concept of you being {anything negative}.) What you can do under those kinds of stress, is to seek aid--the goal of relief and others noticing and helping you can be done by approaching them and talking to them, not balking at the first sign of resistance, and ensuring they're informed of the situation critically.

One cannot sincerely say one doesn't care for themself if they act on anything they do afterwards connected to it--"I don't care about myself" (and further reliance on anger or otherwise emotion) is an idea I've seen many people make when they do in fact especially care; what may be happening is projecting what they may have learned in a way which persists around them, and this conflict of ideas brings these kinds of problems about. Self-hate isn't natural, it is learned, and rather a 'concrete' expression of that conflict mentioned above.

So seeking help is one major solution because it acts to balance out that conflict. Since you're going to school, seek help from the staff in the position to help you. But first comes steps you can do in the now, and that is to not continue hurting yourself. You're learned that it is something you can do under specific situations, but it is something that should not be done; there are many other ways to face your situation there. Probably make a Life Advice thread about it maybe?

Yeah I'm censoring myself before Toady ban me.

You can pretty much control yourself there.
And mentioning what your sad is is relevant to the thread; as long as it's not against anyone in particular and that it too doesn't attack anyone in particular. :O

[hops]

He's not going to read your post, Tiruin.

[Tiruin]

He's not going to read your post, Tiruin.

Cynicism won't help.
But in all seriousness: I know you enough that you don't really mean this in a bad way. And I get your point that I'm being bluntly theoretical in a way in my post >_< Buuut on the wording in yours:
Despite what's going on, one cannot actually say that's what's going to happen because it's attempting to speak for the other person. While this may seem reasonable (probably because there's no SEEMING change), it's...not really reasonable when you consider the person rather than the concept. Also it can come off as impolite if there's no context mentioned. (Thanks for explaining it on the IRC )

[Vector]

-snip-

[TheBiggerFish]

*hugs Vector, just on general principle*

Be yourself more.

[hops]

.

[ChairmanPoo]

Warning - while you were reading 99 new replies have been posted. You may wish to review your post.

[TheBiggerFish]

Warning - while you were reading 99 new replies have been posted. You may wish to review your post.

...That would do it for me, too...

[Solifuge]

-Boop-

Hey Ve, I missed you earlier.

It sounded like so many things have been going well for you these days, and I don't entirely know what to say here. In part, that's just me getting lost in some of the prose and symbolism, the way I do. I can say I'm deeply grateful that your efforts have been paying off lately, as sorry as I am that the You you are today had to pay a heavy price to get here. It's not the way it should be in a Just World, but maybe that Just World would preclude the wisdom and strength gained by weathering these kinds of adversities? Thinking of that makes it easier for me sometimes... it may be so for you too?

The past doesn't stop hurting from time to time, as is it's fashion. It hurts every time we see or think about the raw deals we've gotten historically, and those dealt out to the people we care about. Still, there remains the freedom offered by this present time, and the promise of an unwritten future beyond it. Whatever happened back then, and whatever's happening today, you're okay, and they're okay, and I'm okay, and the world is okay. I promise. And you know as well as I that the days to come will be okay, too. If we all keep doing our best by our innermost selves, they'll be even better than okay.

It may not offer much in the way of pasture, but you've still got a quiet place here to rest as you travel. Here's to remembrances fond and not, to wisdom gained, and to meandering however we all may toward a brighter future.

Much love, and good luck on your journey, friend.

[TheBiggerFish]

Suddenly everything feels like crap and I don't know how to help people.  I can't even help myself.  *sigh*