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Author Topic: My Millitary hates itself.  (Read 2060 times)

Tibbles

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My Millitary hates itself.
« on: September 28, 2009, 04:57:01 am »
Okay, I'm playing a Human Fortress, dug into the side of a volcano, sandwiched between a sinister forest and ocean.

So, I'm doing normal Dwarf Fortressy stuff, when suddenly, I get the notification that one of my Elite Wrestlers has suffocated. The only weapons we were using for training at the time were hammers, so although I found it weird, I let it go, as training accidents happen all the time.

A year later, I decided to do a profile check on a wounded champion, and see that in her notable kills, I see that she was the one that killed the Elite wrestler. Not being disturbed by this at first, I check her thoughts and see that she was married to the man she brutally killed in a sparring accident.

Fast forward a year, and we've finally gotten everything smoothed out (We only have one engraver), so I set him to start engraving. I check out one of his engravings, and find that he has engraved a picture of one of our Champions killing a Elite Wrestler while laughing at him, and it is a different sparring accident that I totally missed, and it was another case of a wife killing her husband.
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GODAMMIT KOBOLDS

Vester

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Re: My Millitary hates itself.
« Reply #1 on: September 28, 2009, 05:19:53 am »
Man, your fort has domestic problems.

Also, I'm certain that the suffocation was crossed either by a broken neck or a badly crushed upper body resulting in pierced lungs. Either would cause death by suffocation.
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"Land of song," said the warrior bard, "though all the world betray thee - one sword at least thy rights shall guard; one faithful harp shall praise thee."

Errol

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Re: My Millitary hates itself.
« Reply #2 on: September 28, 2009, 05:21:20 am »
Quite dwarven for 'umies.
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Tibbles

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Re: My Millitary hates itself.
« Reply #3 on: September 28, 2009, 05:23:01 am »
This fort has been several different kinds of odd. Most of it has to do with the zombie racoon charges and the mysterious disappearing hordes of jellyfish.

Edit: That, and the huge, instant forest fire that seems to have permanently turned the top of the map into an ashen wasteland.
« Last Edit: September 28, 2009, 05:25:34 am by Tibbles »
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Tibbles

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Re: My Millitary hates itself.
« Reply #4 on: September 28, 2009, 05:32:33 am »
hahahah oh god an engraving of the first wife killing her husband and laughing over his corpse is right above her bed
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2xMachina

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Re: My Millitary hates itself.
« Reply #5 on: September 28, 2009, 05:49:01 am »
They sure like it violent...

On the other hand, does your sparing partners always get married?
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Tibbles

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Re: My Millitary hates itself.
« Reply #6 on: September 28, 2009, 06:07:46 am »
Quote from: 2xMachina on September 28, 2009, 05:49:01 am
They sure like it violent...

On the other hand, does your sparing partners always get married?
Not nessacarily sparring partners, but in all my human forts, millitary people get married to millitary people, most often people in their own squad.

Probably something to do with the amount of time they spend together.
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0_0 OH MY SCIENCE 0_0

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Re: My Millitary hates itself.
« Reply #7 on: September 28, 2009, 06:30:56 am »
???
« Last Edit: November 26, 2009, 12:09:16 am by 0_0 OH MY SCIENCE 0_0 »
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Tibbles

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Re: My Millitary hates itself.
« Reply #8 on: September 28, 2009, 07:11:57 am »
With the amount of 'Husband is making a planitive gesture, wife is laughing' engravings everywhere, I'm begining to think that this was less of a training accident, and more of an extremely violent, spectacular and entertaining (For everyone else) divorce.
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Jude

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Re: My Millitary hates itself.
« Reply #9 on: September 28, 2009, 09:57:50 am »
Quote from: 0_0 OH MY SCIENCE 0_0 on September 28, 2009, 06:30:56 am
Well, seems like your playing Amazon Fortress.

Do I hear a new category of challenge fort? Oh yes I do.
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Vester

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Re: My Millitary hates itself.
« Reply #10 on: September 28, 2009, 10:03:56 am »
All women.
Male slaves.
Let's rock.

EDIT:

Also, marriage is punishable by death. For the man.
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"Land of song," said the warrior bard, "though all the world betray thee - one sword at least thy rights shall guard; one faithful harp shall praise thee."

Creaca

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Re: My Millitary hates itself.
« Reply #11 on: September 28, 2009, 05:59:19 pm »
Don't forget to only allow bows, spears, and loincloths for your military.
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snaggles

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Re: My Millitary hates itself.
« Reply #12 on: September 28, 2009, 06:15:35 pm »
Settle in an untamed tropical moist broadleaf forest for bonus points.
 
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1sauber1

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Re: My Millitary hates itself.
« Reply #13 on: September 28, 2009, 06:59:25 pm »
Looks like you've got a case of the Womyn.
Seriously, google it, you might just explode.
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Vester

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Re: My Millitary hates itself.
« Reply #14 on: September 28, 2009, 07:01:44 pm »
Dammit, I hate that term. It's almost as ridiculous as "hir".

On the other hand, Amazon Fortress would be a hilarious challenge.
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"Land of song," said the warrior bard, "though all the world betray thee - one sword at least thy rights shall guard; one faithful harp shall praise thee."
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