A young bot stands in his room. Actually, there is a second, less professionel bot there too, but... let's just ignore him, ok? he's the kind of person that jumps on tables and starts singing advertisment tunes while driving. Anyway, a young bot stands in his room. It just happens that today is his 0.413rd birthday, which would be a very important day to him, if this tin can had any human feelings.
His name happens to be... XXXStandLONGER. Ooops, you read to slow, now it's
www.hairparts4ever.cz. Now its Asstits666...
Well, just call him john13, will you? It's not as it would matter much to him, because he's a rather professional person. Spambot. Whatever.
Actually, YOU are a rather professional spambot, since your name is now john13. Shit happens.
It's a rather electrifying day in the cyberplane, as always, so you haven't even installed windows in you CYBER-OUTLAW-HIDEOUT, or ROOT_CYBER_OUTLAW_HIDEOUT as you call it if you are an especially cold and heartless piece of shit code. This way the sound of your CRAZY SPAMMING SESSIONS, fueled by cold, inhuman perfectionism, can be heard for CYBERKILOMETERS.
Your interests are mainly part of your PROFFESIONAL NATURE. You don't shit around, but you are interested in laxatives, and share this interest with many a random forum-goer. You may be bald as an eightball, but this only sharpens and purfies your love for REAL HUMAN HAIR, which you have written countless pages about in wikis with rather divergating focus. You have send e-mails to close friends-every human is a friend to a bot THIS professional- about real and secure means to longify and extra-girthify their human man-noodles. Many of this mails you have even marked as "important" or "Very important" because in your book, a man-noodle can't be left to god or nature. It is man's -and man's bot's- holy duty to evolve their weakest parts to robotic perfection!!
You got a little carried away with that. It's one of your foremost concern. Like Online Poker, for that you have a winning strategy you spread with religious vigor on lower-class video sites. A true smartitan... samatitty- samonetarian is you!
You use a computer for most of this and other duties, despite already being on the cyberplane. That's just how fucking professional you are.
There is also a sock-puppet in your room. He is called Lèon Sumbiches and is a fresh nigerian oil prince/emperor. He tends to loose his SWEET CA$HMON€Y in terrible revolutions and banking skandals, but you are sure somone will help him out soon. One of this fat Americans, probably.
Speaking of SW€€T CA$H MON€Y, this thingie in the corner is your CA$H-WELL . It stores and emits the CL€AN MON€Y you earn with your smart and swift work. It used to contain the 5$ of an old lady, that clicked on the wrong button and died before she could fix it(a sad story, but full of important allegories and heart-warming altruism), but an AI needs juice, you see? current, electricity, the old BRZZZZ? Yeah, you are pretty much broke.
In your spare time you use your computer to look at banned IPs and various captcha codes(Captcha codes! How do they even fucking work??!), or you decorate your CYBER-OUTLAW-HIDEOUT according to your various interests; you usually just ignore the psychopomps and scavangers that flutter around in it.
Stupid electric birds with their stupid voices in your never-dreaming electric deadsleep.
...anyway, this gentlebot on the table is john14, but let's just call him POOPLORD. He is behaving according to spambot-protocol by terrible annoying and pestering you to see if you are still alive. You will ban him soon, you have left him and his non-existant bot-junk hanging long enough. He is a good kid, was made yesterday. He is specialised in bot-nets and other hardware enslavement.
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Topic: MSPA Homestuck (Read 5194915 times)