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Author Topic: Face Palm moments you had in Dwarf Fortress  (Read 2212897 times)

Ironfang

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #10035 on: February 16, 2017, 10:15:21 pm »

I spent about 10 minutes getting an embark ready, at which point the wagon spawned on top of a frozen waterfall in a hot area that instantly thawed, causing all my dwarves and their supplies to tumble 9 z levels down and splatter against the walls and floor.

Please tell me you saved the embark set up before your dwarves died instantly in an unbelievably funny manner.
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Human King: "So, how was your travel to dwarven lands?"
Human Diplomat: "Never piss off the dwarves, they have an army of hydras"

Dwarf Cook: "Another baby hydra meat roast coming up!"

Urist9876

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #10036 on: February 20, 2017, 03:04:08 am »

One of my dworfs was bitten by a were creature. So I created an alcove to my inn, sealed it with golden grates and put the poor cursed creature there.

At full moon he transformed. Separated. No problem.

Then, after he transformed back, a mercenary archer enters the inn and starts leisurely shooting him...
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Squirrelloid

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #10037 on: February 24, 2017, 11:37:47 am »

I decided to take off the top of a mountain the way coal companies sometimes do, for basically the same reason (it was literally made out of coal).  And just designated the whole thing on multiple levels for mining.

Do you even have to guess what happened?

Are you even surprised I was this dumb?

I occasionally try to do things like that.  I normally give up before I take the entire top of the mountain off.  The other thing to remember is the ramp and channel commands.  I just wish there was a good way to say "I want to take off the top 10 layers of this mountain, starting at the top".  I think you can easily lay out 3 - 4 levels worth of chopping with the priority commands, but the absolute most you can do is 7.

Stairs.  The way to do massive digging projects across multiple z-levels is stairs.  First designate downstairs everywhere, then designate up-down on top of that everywhere.  (The downstairs which are on the surface levels won't get overwritten). 

You can then channel all those stairs out one z-level at a time - they'll channel from the stairs below.  And while you have to do that one z-level at a time, it's much faster than mining, so its not as annoying to pay attention to.

(You will have to remove all the ramps first, or otherwise you won't be able to designate downstairs on top, and that means surface material that will later collapse on you).
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lestmurphy

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #10038 on: February 26, 2017, 04:48:28 pm »

I accidentally traded away a stepladder to some human traders that one of my dwarfs was using to pick fruit from a tree. He was in the tree and couldn't get down because his stepladder had been taken. He died of dehydration up in the tree. I chopped the tree down, and the dead body of my fruit-picker came crashing down to earth. I was able to bury him.
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Derpy Dev

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #10039 on: February 27, 2017, 11:52:40 am »

I accidentally traded away a stepladder to some human traders that one of my dwarfs was using to pick fruit from a tree. He was in the tree and couldn't get down because his stepladder had been taken. He died of dehydration up in the tree. I chopped the tree down, and the dead body of my fruit-picker came crashing down to earth. I was able to bury him.

Oh that explains the random fisherdwarf I found stuck in a tree. I had to chop down the tree to get him down, and I have spent weeks thinking about how he got stuck up there. Thank you so much for explaining this to me.

Ironfang

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #10040 on: February 27, 2017, 12:44:28 pm »

I accidentally traded away a stepladder to some human traders that one of my dwarfs was using to pick fruit from a tree. He was in the tree and couldn't get down because his stepladder had been taken. He died of dehydration up in the tree. I chopped the tree down, and the dead body of my fruit-picker came crashing down to earth. I was able to bury him.

Oh that explains the random fisherdwarf I found stuck in a tree. I had to chop down the tree to get him down, and I have spent weeks thinking about how he got stuck up there. Thank you so much for explaining this to me.

Loss of stepladder will cause fruit picking dwarves to get stuck.
I also believe a tree can explosively grow and trap a dwarf. 
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Human King: "So, how was your travel to dwarven lands?"
Human Diplomat: "Never piss off the dwarves, they have an army of hydras"

Dwarf Cook: "Another baby hydra meat roast coming up!"

Rose

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #10041 on: February 27, 2017, 01:27:10 pm »

Dwarfs can also climb idly, but forget how to when they have somewhere to go.
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TheFlame52

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #10042 on: February 27, 2017, 11:26:01 pm »

I've also seen animals swap dwarves into trees. It used to happen to my animal trainers all the time.

helmacon

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #10043 on: February 28, 2017, 12:33:05 am »

I had a crazy wolverine chase about 6 of my dwarves up into the trees. I had to designate to have them chopped down, and we lost a few legs and a baby in the fall.
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snow dwarf

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #10044 on: February 28, 2017, 05:42:43 am »

I had a crazy wolverine chase about 6 of my dwarves up into the trees. I had to designate to have them chopped down, and we lost a few legs and a baby in the fall.
You should call the fort X-mansion.
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Ironfang

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #10045 on: February 28, 2017, 07:14:41 am »

I had a crazy wolverine chase about 6 of my dwarves up into the trees. I had to designate to have them chopped down, and we lost a few legs and a baby in the fall.
You should call the fort X-mansion.

Name one of the more scholarly dwarves that lost legs "Professor" make a metal worker magneto, so on and so forth.
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Human King: "So, how was your travel to dwarven lands?"
Human Diplomat: "Never piss off the dwarves, they have an army of hydras"

Dwarf Cook: "Another baby hydra meat roast coming up!"

snow dwarf

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #10046 on: February 28, 2017, 07:30:17 am »

I had a crazy wolverine chase about 6 of my dwarves up into the trees. I had to designate to have them chopped down, and we lost a few legs and a baby in the fall.
You should call the fort X-mansion.

Name one of the more scholarly dwarves that lost legs "Professor" make a metal worker magneto, so on and so forth.
Have a cyclops and call him "cyclops".
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Derpy Dev

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #10047 on: March 02, 2017, 08:20:08 pm »

So I face palmed when I got this new mayor. Immediately he started demanding that I create rings, and now he's saying I can't trade all of these masterpiece rings. Time for an unfortunate accident.

snow dwarf

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #10048 on: March 02, 2017, 11:24:52 pm »

So I face palmed when I got this new mayor. Immediately he started demanding that I create rings, and now he's saying I can't trade all of these masterpiece rings. Time for an unfortunate accident.
Well, that's what basically happens. They like something. They demand it. They don't want you to sell it.
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Inconspicuous

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #10049 on: March 03, 2017, 11:00:16 am »

Yeah, in my experience, they usually stop banning the export of a certain good after a while. With mine, he banned the export of battle axes, then unbanned, after a while mandated crowns, banned export of those, etc.

It's only really terrible if you're 100% trade dependent. And if that's the case, then it's time to expand your industries.
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