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Author Topic: Face Palm moments you had in Dwarf Fortress  (Read 2129868 times)

Midboss

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #8700 on: August 04, 2014, 08:30:50 pm »

My leader only requires a decent office, decent quarters and decent dining room. Because her Office is considered a royal throne room her bedroom and dining room now generate unhappy thoughts due to her having to deal with a poor dining room and bedroom. Either that or she decided to take a nap in the dormitory and eat in my room with only 3 tables and 3 chairs instead of the main dining hall.
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Mardukker

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #8701 on: August 05, 2014, 03:33:41 pm »

My leader only requires a decent office, decent quarters and decent dining room. Because her Office is considered a royal throne room her bedroom and dining room now generate unhappy thoughts due to her having to deal with a poor dining room and bedroom. Either that or she decided to take a nap in the dormitory and eat in my room with only 3 tables and 3 chairs instead of the main dining hall.

You know, you could just put her bed and a chair in the royal office and assign each as a bedroom/dining room. Make it one of those all-in-one apartments.
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Dorfs R Fun

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #8702 on: August 05, 2014, 06:03:40 pm »

Found a cool little embark in 40.06 with the southern half being a nice size mountain and the northern half completely flat. Made a temporary fort in a section I planned on channeling out later. Started working on the main fort which was going to have a massive 90x30 grand hall with ceilings 7 z-levels tall. So I dug some stairs up to where I was going to start channeling my way down one layer at a time with nice engraved support pillars and smooth walls. It was going to be glorious.

Doh! I didn't know aquifers could be located half way up a mountain. My dorfs are all currently learning how to swim.
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pisskop

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #8703 on: August 05, 2014, 06:05:17 pm »

My aquifer is more than 1 zlevel deep in the soil, and the 2 zlevels I dropped on it compressed to a single level.  So, yea.  Thats an annoying thing.
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Pisskop's Reblancing Mod - A C:DDA Mod to make life a little (lot) more brutal!
drealmerz7 - pk was supreme pick for traitor too I think, and because of how it all is and pk is he is just feeding into the trollfucking so well.
PKs DF Mod!

Diomedes

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #8704 on: August 05, 2014, 06:55:08 pm »

I am a bit of a perfectionist and I don't like losing. Still, I play my Dwarf Fortress.

Now with 0.40.06 everything was going well. I wasn't locking up dwarves to starve, no giant cave spiders of forgotten beasts, no dwarves dying in cave-ins. I even managed to get an iron anvil first trade caravan.

I had one of my starter dwarves training, no immigrants yet. So I am ready to have a magma force pump out armor/weapons.

So then I discover my militia dwarf flashing next to his armor stand in his barracks. He is lying there, starving, unhappy, hungry. I quickly made some buckets so he could be given water and send to the hospital.
Turns out he had a sparring accident on his individual training drill. So my medical dwarf makes the diagnosis: lower leg gone.

Guy cut off his own leg doing a drill with a wooden axe. so wtf now...
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Edmus

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #8705 on: August 05, 2014, 08:45:30 pm »

Perfect drill sergeant?
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RagingDragon

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #8706 on: August 06, 2014, 03:29:09 am »

So I snared 9 Elf besiegers in my cage traps. Really excited to do something with them other than hiding them from the Elven caravan that showed up the next year. Bi-polar Elves?

Anyway, live targets for my marksdwarves seems like a great use, so I carefully follow the mass-pitting directions on the DF wiki. This takes about 30-45 minutes to get set up.

I'm a cautious dwarf, so I save before trying it, but the first one to pit escapes and my marksdwarves freak out and attack the poor dwarf that let it loose. RELOAD. Do some searching on the forums and find that many people are experiencing this with .40. Alright, no biggie, next step.

I drag the cages downstairs and stick them in the shooting gallery, and build about 9 levers that have my 2 mechanics running back and forth setting up. I link each cage, which uses 2 mechanisms each. 27 mechanisms later, I get my marksdwarves all set up and I'm finally ready to go. Throw the switches and let's do this!

Nope! None of the switches work, because I missed the part where you have to REBUILD the freaking cages to properly link a lever. Wow it would've been nice if it wouldn't have let me waste the 18 mechanisms before I figured that out.

Sigh. Dwarf Fortress, y u do dis?
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Meneth

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #8707 on: August 06, 2014, 04:39:52 am »

If you deconstruct the lever, you'll get all those mechanisms back.
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Diomedes

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #8708 on: August 06, 2014, 05:33:48 am »

Perfect drill sergeant?

I magically removed one toe from the feet of all dwarves and his leg magically reappeared.
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Solon64

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #8709 on: August 06, 2014, 06:42:24 am »

Wait wait wait, dwarves can cut their own legs off in INDIVIDUAL TRAINING?

This is new.  And seemingly unreported.  Possibly a bug, or a gloriously hilarious feature.  Cue army of crippled weapon lord limping out with one leg and one arm to defend the fortress.
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PS: Seriously, you must have, like, super-getting-lost skills. You could go missing in a straight corridor and impale yourself on flat ground if I don't tell you where to go.

Diomedes

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #8710 on: August 06, 2014, 08:42:31 am »

Yeah, its strange. I see no other explanation. The dwarf was just next to his armor stand, unable to walk.
There was no fighting reported and nothing collapsed or anything like that.

Can't figure out what else could have happened. But the lower leg was done and said dwarf was not happy.
« Last Edit: August 06, 2014, 08:45:52 am by Diomedes »
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Edmus

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #8711 on: August 06, 2014, 06:27:35 pm »

Yeah, its strange. I see no other explanation. The dwarf was just next to his armor stand, unable to walk.
There was no fighting reported and nothing collapsed or anything like that.

Can't figure out what else could have happened. But the lower leg was done and said dwarf was not happy.
Sounds like a ghost.
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PDF urist master

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #8712 on: August 06, 2014, 10:58:21 pm »

if it's a ghost, then it should be in the dead/missing screen.

You should invest in crippled dwarves. A silver (or better yet, platinum) crutch is no joke in the hands of a misc. user master.

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We are not evil by choice, but evil by necessity.

Repseki

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #8713 on: August 07, 2014, 05:23:30 am »

My first ambush was six or so Dwarf "recruits" and a Marksdwarf, all with Goblin names. Being completely unarmed, and wearing mostly cloth, the recruits didn't do so great against my three up and coming military dwarves. The Marksdwarf didn't even bother trying to attack, and left a few months later.

The face palm came later, after I had delayed making slabs for our fallen enemy a bit to long. The first ghost that showed up decided to hang out between my temporary meeting zone and all of the food/drink that is stockpiled near the main staircase on the same level. The second thought it would be fun to loiter near the Crafts and Mason workshops, where all of the unused slabs were waiting...

Almost an entire season later I was finally able to get the slabs engraved, and somehow only lost one baby. Not that things are completely safe now that half my fort is unhappy.
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RagingDragon

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #8714 on: August 07, 2014, 09:31:20 pm »

If you deconstruct the lever, you'll get all those mechanisms back.
Aw score, thanks!

Amputee fortress defenders also had me rolling.

Got a few curious ghosts floating about my sewers, too. Scared the hell out of the poor peasant I had assigned on floodgate lever duty, but he was in a burrow and the brave little bastard wouldn't leave. Just stood there and stared right back.
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