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Author Topic: This dwarf can't die!  (Read 2395 times)

woose1

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This dwarf can't die!
« on: November 04, 2008, 05:26:04 pm »

Really, it's starting to scare me now.

One of my dwarves, who I got in an immigrant wave, was a soapmaker.
As such, I deemed him unfit to live, (AKA I had 14 soapmakers already) and so sent on his way to the drowning pit of death, which is bassicly a 7 story high, 1 tile wide room with a floodgate at the top, linking it to the river. I ordered one of my dwarves to pull the lever, and looked at the new renivations to our cemetary. About 5 minutes later I checked back on our pal, Soapy McUseless, and what do you know? he is still alive, but with a DROWNING tab next to his status. I guess its a bug, so I recruit him as a meatsheild and forget about it.

About a month later (game time) Soapy McUseless and his squad of other meatsheilds get ambushed on their patrol route, and his squad is brutally massacred by goblins. By the time I get my swordsdwarves over there and drive away the goblins, I find Ol'Soapy with one of his arms lopped off, one leg mangled, the other lopped off, and most of his body parts yellow or red (including his head). As he feebly crawls back to the fortress, blood seeping behind him, I shrug, and continue on with my fortifacations to my main gate.

Now, as he crawls back and forth in my hallways it is starting to get a little annoying considering I expected him to die ALMOST A YEAR AGO! Also, to make things worse some of my peasants continually follow him around and spam errors. Is some sort of bug? because I am sort of confused.  ???
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Zorgn

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Re: This dwarf can't die!
« Reply #1 on: November 04, 2008, 05:33:07 pm »

Badass soap maker. You should have left him in the drowning chamber until he was dead, but since you didn't... I don't know. If he survives, make him a marksdwarf and station him at your entrance.

What errors are you getting anyway?
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woose1

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Re: This dwarf can't die!
« Reply #2 on: November 04, 2008, 05:37:34 pm »

They stopped posting errors, though they were mainly canceled jobs like hauling and stuff.
P.S. he does still try to spar, which is odd, because should'nt try to rest?
P.S.S. Both his eyes were poked out.... which must lead to some preety funny sparring lessons, considering the sparring area/barracks are near a major traffick area, so sometimes peseants and/or cows and/or cats and/or dogs will wander near them.
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JoshuaFH

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Re: This dwarf can't die!
« Reply #3 on: November 04, 2008, 05:43:19 pm »

God, you wasted the toughest dwarf in the world because he was a soapmaker. way to discriminate man, his father and his father before him were soapmakers, he didn't have a choice.

i hope to god your not lying, because the more you describe it, the funnier it is. imagining a one-armed, one-legged, blind dwarf so freakin' tough he doesn't need bed rest and he scares those around him into stopping what they're doing, its just too much. i wish prosthetics were possible, cause then you could give him eye patches and a peg leg and wooden arm and everything! it would be awesome.
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ByDurinsBeard

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Re: This dwarf can't die!
« Reply #4 on: November 04, 2008, 05:47:38 pm »

Never underestimate the power of soap. I mean, you can build an impregnable fortress out of it, you shouldn't expect nothing less of the dorfs that makethat stuff.
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woose1

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Re: This dwarf can't die!
« Reply #5 on: November 04, 2008, 05:53:07 pm »

Your comments make me laugh  ;D

Also, I did not Know that he was like the toughest dwarf in the world that ate nails for breakfast and pissed vinegar. Im just a malevolent bastard.
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woose1

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Re: This dwarf can't die!
« Reply #6 on: November 04, 2008, 05:55:50 pm »

...And, dwarven prostetics would be horribly inconvenient and unessasarily complicated. They would weigh like hundreds of pounds, and since the mayor mandated wood and metal; they would be made out of glass or something.

....

Or soap.
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Zorgn

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Re: This dwarf can't die!
« Reply #7 on: November 04, 2008, 06:12:28 pm »

...And, dwarven prostetics would be horribly inconvenient and unessasarily complicated. They would weigh like hundreds of pounds, and since the mayor mandated wood and metal; they would be made out of glass or something.

....

Or soap.

They would also have many blades, hidden flamethrowers, and a cat in there somewhere. SCIENCE!
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Aqizzar

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Re: This dwarf can't die!
« Reply #8 on: November 04, 2008, 06:15:51 pm »

Dwarven prosthetics are heavy because like all other dwarven utensils and furniture, they're made of stone.
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And here is where my beef pops up like a looming awkward boner.
Please amplify your relaxed states.
Quote from: PTTG??
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woose1

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Re: This dwarf can't die!
« Reply #9 on: November 04, 2008, 06:22:05 pm »

Lol, the main idea of this thread was to figure out how to make him die. I mean, hes cool and everything, but those lazy ass peasants stop and stare at him whenever they are hauling stone or booze back to the stockpiles.

Maybe I could create this cool outpost for him with traps and such with some wardogs chained up to the entrance. not only could they warn me of ambushes and stuff, but when fido starts barking, it lets Soapy know that it's time to kick some ass!
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kurisukun

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Re: This dwarf can't die!
« Reply #10 on: November 04, 2008, 06:48:47 pm »

Well, build some traps around him.  I'm assuming he passes out a lot, when he passes out on a trap, he'll be caught in it, and subsequently mauled/killed.

Unless he lives through that too....

Turnip

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Re: This dwarf can't die!
« Reply #11 on: November 04, 2008, 07:47:53 pm »

CAGE TRAP.
EXPORT HIM BACK TO THE MOUNTAINHOMES
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And (because of various programming quirks) dwarves are kinda stupid. Granted, so are the other races. But still.
And yet these stupid dwarves are going to eventually make a nuclear weapon out of cheese and basalt.

Foa

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Re: This dwarf can't die!
« Reply #12 on: November 04, 2008, 08:39:30 pm »

CAGE TRAP.
EXPORT HIM BACK TO THE MOUNTAINHOMES
Like what I do to nobles.
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LegoLord

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Re: This dwarf can't die!
« Reply #13 on: November 04, 2008, 08:41:58 pm »

I had an axedwarf lose both eyes in a fight once.  I relieved him from duty, which made him a carpenter.  There were constant job cancellations due to falling unconscious.  He eventually starved to death because he couldn't find the food stockpile.
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"Oh look there is a dragon my clothes might burn let me take them off and only wear steel plate."
And this is how tinned food was invented.
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woose1

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Re: This dwarf can't die!
« Reply #14 on: November 04, 2008, 09:08:45 pm »

So sad...
I was halfway done with my bunker when he decided to jump off the magma bridge...  :'(

Aw well... anyway, it took almost 11 seconds for him to die! Awsome!
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