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[CanadianWolverine]

War'dunell Dakostuzol 21st of Moonstone, 1066

What's this? Some snake guy died on the red sands today or was it yesterday? Lucky bastard, he went out well, in battle showing some green skins what for.

...

I was just told a few moments ago that he was the guy who took out a tentacle demon like a total bad ass dwarf! You think I would have remembered that, but the stories told about this place while on the hard roads were always kinda vague on details like that. Bah, would have liked to train with that guy. Was even told he was exiled at one time too. Odd, you think he would have seen that as his chance to Escape Migrursut but instead he protected this place.

Hmm, I wonder if I will ever get a title too. Doesn't seem bloody likely with this crap equipment I've been training with but the view of the sun off the sand around here more than makes up for it. Eita shared with me between training sessions she wonders if we should have kept going and never looked back - I can't fathom that, this place is a red sandy heaven on earth.

[Eita]

The Journal of Eita Kolnebel

A Swordsdwarf named Snake died some time ago. I barely noticed over the time my search has been taking from me. I've had to scrounge up the squad's equipment from all the back-corners of the fortress, done some shady dealings with the traders, and stolen at least a thousand turtles worth of armor.

[Heavy Flak]

The events of the 3^rd of Opal, 1066

"SCREW YOU, DAD!  I'll do whatever the hell I want!"

In just a few weeks time since the sobering events of Snake's death, screaming and drama had reared it's head once again.  Neo and War'dunell, newely christened in their roles of Swordsdwarf and Axedwarf thanks to their increased training schedules due to Eita's tireless efforts in getting better equipment peered out of the barracks. 

Istrath stood in the hallway looking bewildered.  In his hands were multiple schematics for support walkways.  Standing by the stairs was his soon, Limul, his face bright red.

"Son, what's wrong with you?  All I want is for you to hold down my workshop while I go out to assemble some scaffolding."
"No!  You're going out to help those swindler thieves.  Man, do you know what they're doing?  They're helping the... pornographers of this fortress, like, suppress the hard working Dwarves by... making them PAY for SEX, man!  They're wanting to jazz up that den of sin and start overcharging every single pleb that comes through these gates, and that, like, ain't right!"
"What are you talking about?" Istrath said, reaching up to tug on his hair in frusteration.
"The pornographers don't support them at all, son," Erith Othsindoren said as he walked past.  He sighed, shrugging dramatically, "Dodik made us pay just like the rest of the workers.  No sense of art.  Though... you're looking pretty strapping these days.  Care to pose for an engraving?  I'll make you a star, kid."

Limul looked like he was about to vomit.  "Get out of here, ya' freak!   And as for you, Dad, I'm already a star.  Akroma says so, he said he hasn't seen anyone work a corpse like I have - it's art.  You want your store watched, watch it yourself.  Or stop working for those fascist jerks."
"Now don't say that.  Rinsesilver is a good employer, and pays well."
"Yeah, well, not for you, 'less you can find someone to hold the shop down."

Istrath sighed and shook his head, "Fine, I'll just go talk to Keldor then."

Limul, fuming, turned and ran up the steps, slamming any door he saw on his way topside.  Istrath just sighed, and went towards the mess, hoping he could find the newest gem setter around to lend a hand.

[Heavy Flak]

The events of the 12^th of Opal, 1066

"Go for the HEAD!  The HEAD!" 

Rolland barked out his orders, and Eita followed them, her words kept harsh and low, unheard by group.  The herd of Dread Camel had been hobbled by ex-hunter Sparrow, their mostly decomposed bodied flopping around in the sand, bolts having shattered their legs. 

That had been part of the bargain.  Outfitted in full steel plate, her hammer solid steel and wrought with goblin bone, Eita walked towards the downed camel with a mixture of boredom and annoyance.

"Like this?" War'Dunell called. She hefted her axe up and brought it down on the camels neck, the body and head stilling completely as she severed the spine.  Neo had the same result, his sword severing the little bit of tissue that held the vertebrae together.  Laughing, he turned to look at War'dunell, flashing a lopsided grin, "Look at that, a quick snnnnck and the bastard beasts fall like sacks of grain!  To think we spent all that time beating in their rock-hard skulls and doin' nothing but denting up swords."

"Speak for yourself," War'dunell said, kicking the blade of her axe to knock off some stuck sand.  "I never had a problem splitting a skull when needed."

"You're a liar," Eita said, bringing her hammer down hard.  She kiai'd, squatting down at the last second to lower her center of gravity.  The head of her hammer whistled ominously, and crashed downwards, sinking deep into the sand.  Splinters of bone and dust sprayed out from where the camel's head once was.

"Is this necessary?" Eita asked.  She turned to look at Rolland, annoyed.  Rolland turned to look at her critically, chewing on the end of a hand rolled cigarette. 
"Every year, a half dozen dwarves lose their lives at the hooves of Dread Camels.  They do this through ignorance and bravado.  You can swing an axe, of that I have no doubt.  And you have strength and resolve.  But you need practice and discipline.  There's a forth one left.  Show me how you'd bring it down, if it could walk."

Rolland and Sparrow watched as Eita, grumbling, marched over to the dread camel and raised her hammer on high.  Sparrow winced as it was brought down, shattering it's skull, but Rolland only shook his head.

"You hesitated.  That will never do.  Come with me, there's another herd down by the river.  We'll practice until you can do this in your sleep"

[Heavy Flak]

The events of the 20^th of Opal, 1066

A majority of Dwarves not out in the wastes working were gathered in the mess hall, trying to meet the gaze of an incredibly angry Aryn.  He paced in front of the long tables, his hands clasped behind him.  Coming to a stop, he turned and dropped his head, his voice low. 

"Even out here, with everything I've seen and done, I'm still amazed by just how absurd you can all be.  Did any of you realize we had a children stolen yesterday?  I know at least four of you did.  That would be Kib Machinescalded and her troops, and Vatek Yellowbolted.  Here, why don't you two come up here with me.  Come on, I won't bite."

Kib and Vatek slowly made their way up to the front, flanking Aryn.  He smiled humorlessly, and gestured to Kib with his right hand.  "Mrs. Machinescalded found out about the child snatchers... why did you find out about them?"
"...Because my youngest born was grabbed me."
"Ohh, and when was this?"
"When we were on duty."
"On duty doing what."

Kib sighed.  "On duty poking a Dread Camel with a stick, since it's legs were all broken."
"Uh huh, so you're... poking a dangerous animal with sticks, and then this... this snatcher rushes up and grabs the baby off your back, stuffs it in a bag, and makes it's way to the hills with it's friend - who also has a child.  And that brings us to you, Yellowbolted."   Aryn gestured to Vatek with his left hand. 

"This guardsman saw the entire thing, as he stood out in the middle of the desert by Captain Fillwhip's obsession.  He watched it, he called out for help, and... he stayed standing there!  Kib got her child back, but the other?  Gone, snatched.  Another of our number stolen away to Goblin Horrors.  What is WRONG with you all!"
"Which cihld was it?"  Someone called from the crowd.
"IT WADN'T ME!" Grov shouted from the back, waving his arms, "I'M RIGHT HERE."
"Oh, who cares?" Aryn snapped.  "It's not important which one was taken, it's important THAT one was taken.  Mrs. Machinescalded, you're no longer allowed to play with the dead.  In fact, you're not allowed down time.  You've got a month of patrol.  And Vatek, you're not to loiter by construction sites anymore.  You're to guard the doors to the fort.  Do I make myself clear?"

Vatek turned to look at Aryn, paling.  He glanced into the crowd and saw Stravitch standing near the back.  The Captain of the Guard was glaring, and slowly he lifted a hand up to his throat to draw his thumb across it, shaking his head slowly.  Vatek swallowed and said nothing.   Aryn shook his head and closed his eyes, pointing towards the door.

"Get out of here, all of you.  And keep your eyes open.  Stop being so damned stupid!  Think!  Think about what you're doing!"

[CanadianWolverine]

War'dunell Dakostuzol 20th of Opal, 1066

Been a fun month! Goodness me, I like training just as much as I love cutting down trees and goblins. We even got to go out in the beautiful sands and "meat" some of the local wild un-life. Such a wonderful sound they make: "Snnnnck!"

While I don't normally get close to others, I am certainly grateful for all the tremendous effort Eita has gone to, making sure we have been having such a good time.

Hey, I found out a bit about all the beautiful and sexy carvings one day. I wonder if Erith would carve me? I'd get him to make it like I have nothing on but a huge battle axe in my hands and another two hanging from their straps on my shoulders, standing on a dune of red sand with a tanzanite and horn adorned dwarven bikini standing over my fallen foes, especially a large roach! Yeah, that would be sweet, it would be like I was a hero like those stories my dad would tell me before he went away and ... Whatever, probably won't happen, sounded like he was more interested in Limul anyways. Though, Dodik's place sounds interesting, like a really fun place to try new things.

I hear this old hulk of a Dwarf likes that place too, goes by the name of Stravich. He's kinda cute for an old dwarf but I doubt he would ever see anything in me. I hear he is making sure a kick ass temple gets built, not like that prim and proper place. What am I thinking, Lenod is cool and all but I probably won't go, I would rather be bouncing off the sand with my axes training till it feels oh so good. You know what my favourite part of training is? Knowing that if I dish it out good enough, people will leave me alone for the most part. Suits me fine. If they can't take the pain, why are they training?

Speaking of pain, had to sit through some boring ass meeting with that Aryn "Aristocrat" leading the charge against some dolts who can't fathom the concept. I don't even know what the big deal is, if I ever have kids and they get snatched, the little brat probably had it coming for not following my instructions and smashing the dirty rotten kidnapper in the family jewels and snapping their neck when they fall over, like I saw this wrestler do once. Hmm, I wonder if I will get to try some more wrestling one day? That stuff is fun and I always love trying new things...

OOC: Hey Heavy Flak, I know its probably unintentional, but Aryn reminds me of Louis Riel (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Louis_Riel), a guy who tried to preserve his way of life in Canada, got exiled, founded a bunch of places, got elected even while the government of the time was trying to throw him in prison, possibly went a little crazy, started a rebellion and later got executed.

       Oh, and what does "She has complained about the draft lately" mean? Is that like she doesn't like a constant breeze of air or being drafted into the military? Heh, that would be funny if it was the second, I would feel silly for writing her like I am then. 

[Jools]

Erm, yes, "complained about the draft" is a negative thought for any dwarf drafted in to the military who doesn't have any fighting skills. However, that's not to say that your dwarf hasn't come to love fighting in the short time she (?) has been in the military, so I don't think that that makes anything you've written look wrong.

Also: GOBLINS TRYING TO SNATCH A MACHINESCALDED KID? This I can't stand for, even if Kib got the child back (and exactly how many pieces did she leave the Goblin in?). Heavy Flak, next time you're looking for another wave of meat shie new recruits (no rush, just next time you feel like plugging some holes or expanding the military), please count me in. This is one donkey keeper who's chosen to stand and fight for what he believes in (family, donkeys, oh and Zefon). Sword, shield, and then later, possibly some experiments with a donkey cavalry...

[Groveller]

It was only a matter of time before he started 'experimenting' with his donkeys...

[Zako]

What would they be called though? Donkeyleirs? Bovineriders?


Yes this is quite enjoyable, try it!

[Heavy Flak]

CanadianWolverine: Jools is correct.  Your dwarf didn't actually have any military skills coming in to the fortress, so when drafted she was negatively affected.  She's now officially an axe-dwarf, and quite happy with her post.  She had successful training sessions and hasn't taken any injury.  Neither's Zako, for that matter, who managed to make it to Legendary Wrestler without any more booboos, or dying, or anything!

Jools: The incident of Kib and the Stolen Baby actually ties in with why Snake bit the dust (Something I was NOT happy about.)  Let's start the story off from the beginning...

A multi-legendary Dwarf is found dead by a crack-squad of seven worthless goblin wrestlers and their macegoblin friend.  With Sulari currently away cracking the skulls of what turned out to be TWO goblins and a herd of dread camel, I sent the closest dwarf to deal with them - Snake.  He gets there, and I promptly forget about it, until I get the notice "Snake has died!"

So I get pissed and overkill it - I send Towersacks AND Maggarg's squads over and watch in confusion as it takes them five real-time minutes to kill the remaining gobbos.  It wasn't until it took Kib and her group five minutes of chasing around a couple goblin snatchers and still only killing one that I looked into the raws for what the problem is.

Oh!  I'd set the Goblin's size to like, 100, and forgotten to change it back!  teehee!  My mistake!  Now that I know goblins of that size can actually kill legendaries, I'm going to add in a couple more tags like nofear and whatever one makes them ignore limbs getting removed, and see how the next siege goes. 

Groveller: This is going to sound really really strange, but I, uh, lost Grov *ducks*.  I don't mean he was snatched, or that he died.  I mean I literally lost him.  He shows up in Dwarf Companion as happy and alive, but he doesn't show up in the unit list AT ALL.  If he doesn't...magically come back into existance, I might have to switch him to another child.  Where the hell did he go??  I think Migrursut is starting to implode...

[Groveller]

He's not locked in the basement, is he? Maybe he's sneaking, or hiding in the giant wooden donkey...

[sneakey pete]

Sumo goblins!

(ok, i know that they'd be a lot bigger than that with size 100, but the mental picture of sumo goblins...)

[Jools]

Oooops indeed re: the oversized goblins. I'm sure there's some sort of moral here about not playing with things to make them grow in size, lest you end up with an unsightly mess on your hands, but I can't quite think what it is.

Still, at least it took something reasonably epic to finish Snake off, and I am reassured by Kib chasing round like a lunatic after a pair of, essentially, Goblin Giants who could have easily tucked the children they snatched behind their ear or something for carrying purposes. And even better, getting our child back.

As for Migrursut imploding... well, after all the tinkering I wouldn't be surprised if it did, but is there any chance that you're just hitting some sort of limit of how many creatures DF can keep track of? Or that Grov got snatched and nobody noticed?

[Skid]

What's his location given as in Dwarf Companion?

[Heavy Flak]

Jools: I have this fear in the back of my mind that I'm going to get close to the end and the whole save will just explode under all the random tweaks and crap I've pulled.  But I'm also a paranoid; last night I almost shot the cats because I was convinced I was getting robbed.  I've almost put a round through the washing machine too, when it switched cycles without warning. 

I don't think Grov got snatched, because one of the things I did was unhide ever snatcher in the area, look through all their stuff, then re-hide them.  Not a one of them had a child.

Skid: There's another weird thing.  He was like, inside a bunch of rock.  I tried moving him to ground level, but nothing, he wasn't there.  There's also a raccoon in the vicinity which is just weird, because I have never ever EVER seen a raccoon, either brought by merchants or wandering around the desert.