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[Mr.Mountain]

^{First time doing something like this! I'm sure it won't be hard. At all. Right?}

Kip has been exiled! Who's Kip? Here's Kip!


_{So dapper in that grimy green cloak.}
Kip was onboard a ship to exile, but a nasty storm sent it under waves. So Kip's been adrift in a tiny rowboat for a few days; death isn't too far now. But—

Land!


Splitting that blue horizon so sweetly is the sight of dry land. Maybe this exile won't end with dehydration! _{Wait... why's Kip even exiled?}

What was the nature of Kip's crimes?
More importantly: is Kip rowing to land or what?

Spoiler: Status (click to show/hide)

  Kip
  CONDITION: Starving; Dehydrated
  HEADSPACE: Having a bad day

[techno65535]

Kip has been exiled from land, forced to never again step foot upon dry land again for the crime of insulting the land.

As such, he cannot row towards the land but must turn away from it.

[King Zultan]

He was exiled for committing the worst crime imaginable, he insulted the king's mustache!

[A_Curious_Cat]

Kip unsuccessfully tried to emulate the elves by attempting to create a human-tree hybrid using methods similar to those used by the elves in their (equally unsuccessful) attempts to make an elf-tree hybrid.

Kip is rowing towards the land.  Maybe there will be trees with which he can alleviate his loneliness…

[Egan_BW]

All of the above, in addition to whatever crimes other people come up with after me.

And Kip will defy fate and the natural order by going towards the land!

[crazyabe]

What was the nature of Kip's crimes?
Kip Committed the crime of "returning from Exile", the crime he was previously exiled for was "Double Deicide"
More importantly: is Kip rowing to land or what?
Kip is hoping the wind keeps blowing that way, he forgot to grab a paddle when the ship went down.

[Haspen]

He was exiled for committing the worst crime imaginable, he insulted the king's mustache!

+1

[Mr.Mountain]

He was exiled for committing the worst crime imaginable, he insulted the king's mustache!

+1

What was the nature of Kip's crimes?
Kip Committed the crime of "returning from Exile", the crime he was previously exiled for was "Double Deicide"

A few weeks ago...

Mere days into awaiting his first exile for carving up a sacred tree, Kip returned to the site. He has a problem with authority, it seems.

And there was a pointy-eared, bearded druid.

Kip knew exactly what he had to do...


Give him a shave! Poor guy looked completely ridiculous with that facial hair. Unfortunately for Kip, he was something-something lord of the forest, something-something sacred beard.
^{Plus the whole Kip's-already-a-criminal thing.}
So...

And Kip will defy fate and the natural order by going towards the land!

The unfortunate present...

Kip manages to run that dinghy aground without getting toppled by the waves. Kip also found an small, empty waterskin sitting in the boat while jostling the tide.

He's all alone on the beach now ^(kinda). Just relieved to be on land again.


There's a silent, hooded figure just ahead of Kip.
There are a few crabs scuttling about their sand burrows.
The rolling beach continues East and West.
Forested hills begin rising to the north.
^{Kip's next move is...}

Spoiler: Status (click to show/hide)

  Kip
  CONDITION: Starving; Dehydrated
  HEADSPACE: The worst of it HAS to be over, right?
  Possessions: A small waterskin, a dinghy, the clothes on his back.

[Haspen]

Kip is hungry.

Crabs are tasty.

Time to eat.

[Egan_BW]

Figure out if the hooded figure has hair, and if it does, shave it.

[A_Curious_Cat]

Figure out if the hooded figure has hair, and if it does, shave it.

+1

[techno65535]

Oh crap! It's a person! Turn around and head back out to sea. We don't want anyone to see our experiments.

[King Zultan]

Figure out if the hooded figure has hair, and if it does, shave it.

+1

+1

[Mr.Mountain]

Figure out if the hooded figure has hair, and if it does, shave it.

+1

+1

Kip approaches.

The figure begins in gravely speech.

"By three, I greet thee. Upon this isle the first, where soured sailors thirst—waitwhatareyou—"

It's an old crone! And she's got HAIR!

But...
^{Kip's got nothing to chop hair with...}

"Ahh... well. Upon this isle the first, where soured sailors thirst—" she sighs and re-hoods "—no, it's ruined now. You ruined it. Ill tidings and farewell."

She begins to turn and walk away. With a full head of hair.

Spoiler: Status (click to show/hide)

  Kip
  CONDITION: Mmm... crab; What even is water?
  HEADSPACE: Could be worse. Could be riddles.
  Possessions: A small waterskin, a dinghy, the clothes on his back.

[Superdorf]

welp... we need water.

Isn't the water farther inland near an ocean supposed to be fresh? Get away from the waves a bit, and dig a hole in the sand. Drink of the resulting sludge.