TURN I
Who are you?: The Almighty Nix
What are you?: Hulking Brute
Your evil plan: Beat everybody up until they listen to me
The Almighty Nix towers above lesser men. He is grander than their knights, their buildings, their puny iron gates. He stomps on the wreckage of one such gate, formerly the entrance to a hamlet called Ringshire. Its people defied him, so he carved a path through homes and businesses until they changed their minds.
Now they will listen. Now they will obey.
Who are you?: Mandible
What are you?: Hive King
Your evil plan: The ultimate prosperity of the Colony is supposed to be the ultimate goal, the Queens strayed from that goal when they made peace with the Primates. Mandible wanted the Colony to continue to prosper, the Queens were removed, now Madible will make the Colony prosper again. The age of the Primate is over, the age of the Hive will begin as the Horde devours the world.
((Can't believe I'm making my PC a serious-ish version of the Antz dude))
Mandible rests in the Center of his Colony, mouth still dripping with the greenish ichor of the Hive Queens. There is no greater being in these halls, and so the Horde is already his to command. Already his drones are stoking the forges, preparing the deadly tools of war. Siege larvae hatch in chambers deep beneath the earth, hungry for their first meal.
The Horde will march forth. The Primates will die at their hands.
Who are you?: Nah Impartain
What are you?: Edgy MFer
Your evil plan: Kill all the people with a sword until they stop being alive.
Nah Impartain spares a moment to clean his sword. He's surrounded by bloody ruins, the remains of a merchant caravan that did nothing to displease him but had the terminal misfortune of being nearby. Because of that he cut apart the goods, and the wagons, and the pack animals, and also the merchants themselves. They are very obviously no longer alive.
This is good. The entire world should be like this.
Who are you?: GRAMPA SCREAM
What are you?: LOUD! GENEROUS!
Your evil plan: UNITE EVERYTHING WITH A MOUTH IN A LITANY OF SCREAMING! PROVIDE MOUTHS - FREE OF CHARGE! - TO THOSE POOR BASTARDS THAT DON'T HAVE ANY AND UNITE THEM TOO!
Grandpa Scream stands in an empty meadow. None of the plants here can talk, the poor buggers, and so he kindly provides them with mouths to scream with. He slaps new oral cavities on some insects, too, and a couple of rabbits for good measure. The more the merrier! Now this grove is filled with a pleasantly shrieking chorus, and the lives of nearby flora have been enriched!
Think about all the impoverished souls out there. The ones who can't scream 'till their throats are hoarse. The injustice of it all!
Who are you?: Princess Coral
What are you?: Evil Mermaid
Your evil plan: Flood the world, kill the air breathers, subjugate the rest.
Princess Coral gazes at the edge of the sea, a place the cursed air-breathers call a "land." It is an abomination against nature, a thing that should not exist, and so she calls upon the power of the deeps. A tsunami crashes against the shore, drowning the humans and crushing their puny boats. Their homes sink beneath the waves.
Coral rules the seas already. It is time she ruled the world.
Who are you?: King Zultan
What are you?: Rat Man
Your evil plan: Unite all people under my rule.
King Zultan huddles in a dank cave, surrounded by a swarm of his lesser kin. The rats squeak and scurry. They eat and sleep and die at his command. Soon it will be time to invade the surface, where the ape-men dwell. They, too, should be a part of his kingdom, and beholden to his will. Are men not akin to rats? Both have warm bodies and beating hearts.
All the mammalian races will kneel, and some of the other ones too.
Who are you?: Cat guy
What are you?: ANGRY CAT
Your evil plan: Steal all the food and cause an everlasting famine
Cat Guy huddles in his pantry. There's food here, enough to fill his bowl, but that isn't truly
enough. He wants to eat human food. The humans' food. In fact, he should eat all of the food in the entire world, and leave everyone else to starve! Its not as if his mortal slave has been productive, anyway. Three meals a day? Cat food? Pah!
Who are you?: Glebnea
What are you?: Slime Queen
Your evil plan: Me and my people have been exiled from the lands, butchered, hunted...we are tired of being killed. We wish to spread. Slimes will rule all.
Glebnea stands at the border of the wasteland, with an army of gelatinous subjects at her back. This is the place the humans drove her to, when they decided that slimes had no place within their lands. Her people were left to cower and starve. They were killed, slaughtered by the dozens, at the hands of peasants with rusty blades!
It is time for the
peasants to cower. The age of ooze is upon them!
Who are you?: Delta, Royal Orange Jelly
What are you?: Slime King
Your evil plan: Devour all the monsters and build the grand army of slime evolutions to devour everything that can kill, until only Slimes remain.
Delta, Royal Orange Jelly, ruler of all he surveys, gazes upon the wasteland and wobbles. The humans forced him to this place, when they cleansed their lands of ooze. That was their worst mistake. There are monsters here, great and terrible monsters that he will do battle with in the name of jellykind.
His armies will engulf them, learn from them, adapt, until the world is naught but slime.
Greetings, friends. Whether you are a servant in my dark armies, my traitorous lieutenant, or an evil overlord in your own right, know that I welcome your presence. People such as you are always a pleasure to torment.
May your monologues continue uninterrupted,
Grand Vizier Whisperling the First
Author
Topic: VILLAINOUS (Read 6514 times)