Journal of the Tavern Keeper Overseer 5th of Limestone 179Elpho has been spending a surprising amount of time in the Tavern recently, listening and telling stories and occasionally dancing. He also for some reason started praying to an imaginery deity named Ninur Brainbastion...outside of the temples. Maybe I gave his ghoulish form the wrong drink last night or perhaps its a side effect of being so tainted by elves he can't help but pray outside.
The weird part is this: when he was alive, he was never this legitimately artistic. His poetry was rubbish and ripped off from other authors which is why nobody took him seriously, but he's a good storyteller and weirdly, singer in death. Though it appears his recognition is damaged from undeath since he has randomly socialised in the tavern and the armourers guild when nobody is there to listen. The filthy Elf Lover has at least proven to be a decent string of news.
He spouted off that Salmeuk was pondering the Tumbler Lock. Apparently its some fancy design for a lock thats designed to prevent tampering. Good if Goblins get into the fortress. He also mentioned that Radiofort was pondering Diseases. Presumably the poor caretaker's duties had...affected him somehow.
He also mentiomed the master chef had named a steel shield Cratergorge. Apparently after a flaming rock that fell from the sky and squashed an elf once. Not a bad story honestly
In more important news, Dr Imic, like myself, had experience training animals back at Cactushexes. I have enough duties as is so away Imic goes to train our elephants and grizzlies
Speaking of the elephants, those lumbering giants need nearly 200 square urists of fodder EACH. I've ordered a place dug but for now they're going to have to live in the tree farm. Not like we were using it anyway.
Journal of the Tavern Keeper Overseer 14th of Limestone 179Dr Imic is
good at training animals.
I'm assigning Imic to train up more of our animals. We have loads of dogs about, some war dogs would bolster our Small Military in combat. Especially the Swamp hunters who could use the defence if they get caught up in melee which is not unheard of. This is why they should be cross trained in hammer skills. Unfortunately they need to be better shots first.
But that's what the arena is for- live target practice. The dumping room is ready. From here we can put all our caged prisoners straight into the arena to starve and be maimed for when our dwarves need to spar in real conditions.
While examining the hatches, Auze called for me to announce the Mountainhomes caravan had arrived.
7 Wagons total with quite a few useful bits in amongst the sheer crates of silk. Someone back there clearly managed to get a Giant Cave Spider silk farm going. Whoever it was I drink to them!
A Pineapple wine stain in the shape of a *Platinum flask* lines the edge of the pageI expressed interest in their entire stock of plump helmets (80) every drink in the wagons not allocated for merchant use, parchment to write on, an empty book, some finely crafted steel armour, a steel crossbow studded with Tin, some gold, rose gold and steel bars, a bar of charcoal, cages and the 8 pieces of wood stuffed in the back of a wagon.
In return, we had 37 masterwork Giant Red Wing Blackbird roast pies, some crafts (Including a masterwork amulet of Salmeuk being refused by dwarves in Beeswax. Who made that?) and a couple of silver warhammers we had spare.
"With your Trade goods such as they are, I can't fathom giving you all that" I overheard the merchant telling Auze.
I called Auze up to the Tavern and gave him a drink since he was starting to get sober. The merchant followed.
Auze tried again freshly inebriated, pointing out we offered them goods nearly 4 times as much as we were buying.
"We need to make more profit than that" the gouging straggly bearded git replied.
A 37655 urist profit was not enough? Unacceptable. I then had an idea. I gave Auze a mead to take back to the merchant, and told him to barter for a portion of the list. Start with the bars and the plump helmets. It worked, the merchant was pleased with the trading.
I then when collecting mugs, dropped a bottle of longland beer on the table. Auze kept negotiating and the merchant kept drinking. He was very happy after the second booze having sold the cages and parchment for a bin of scepters.
Finally Auze asked me to top up the drinks. I did so and they had a final round. The merchant was ecstatic, then fell off his chair drunk into a stupor. Auze was barely inebriated despite having had the same amount.
"So how did it go Auze?" I asked, rolling the merchant down the stairs to the empty floor.
"When you add it up, its the exact same as what we offered in the first place." he replied. "No trade agreement yet though. Can I have another 6 rounds?"
I clapped him on the back and gave him another bottle of longland beer.
"Excellent, find me when he wakes up with the trade agreement. The leftmost shelf behind the bar is yours to drink today. I'm off to set the cages."
A few hours of hauling later Auze came back with the trade agreement.
Wait a moment...
The drippings from a celebratory toast of Perry stain the pageThe mountainhomes has
finally recognised my brewing for what it is! They already know of my exploits in warfare from the statues, and my clothcraft from the clothing. Now they acknowledge my booze at last! See mountainhomes! I am the dwarf to bring the dwarven age, not that pathetic weakling of a queen that kicked me out here for beating her in a contest.
I can craft luxuries fit for Armok, I can brew drinks to send anyone, even Auze under the table, I can fight a deity that dares bring the world to ruin, and I can make you regret having kicked me out to die here in Smallhands!
Journal of the Tavern Keeper Overseer 6th of Sandstone 179It is time, throw them in!
Now
that is curious. The goblins and their former slaves and betrayers are fighting one another. A curious phenomenon. Perhaps some of them aren't as brainwashed as thought. Less to shoot at however, but at least its emptying the cages.
I guess we're not having live target practice after all. But we can toss them in nonetheless. I can find other places to test the army.
There's an old castle near the Sinewsabres ruins by the name of Jeweldusks. Its a human castle...or was. Its apparently empty, but that doesn't seem right. No human would abandon such a strategic position.
In addition our scouts reported that Frenzyescort, a human town that got taken over by the goblins currently has very few members there in addition ot rumours of some artifacts that will be useful
Siegebreakers! Arm up! I have a mission for you. Overseers army, I have a different mission for you!
Journal of the Tavern Keeper Overseer 8th of Sandstone 179I observed them from the top of the Tallbar. The Siegebreakers strode over the horizon heads held high. Behind them were dwarves in tattered rags. Cheerful and singing drinking songs. Marching...marching in line too. That's odd.
Wait a moment...that beard...is that Mestthos? I thought he was dead!
I took a drink and descended to the viewing window. No way, my eyes don't decieve me. That's my armourwork...and that cloak, I remember those. Blue raptors...
it cannot be! But it is!
The missing Rainbow Raptors!
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OOC: I can't believe I found them!
I'm splitting this update into two parts due to its size, the other will come in a few days and hopefully hte last update.
Edit: since we lost them attacking sinewsabres, this confirms that they can be moved about while offsite. idk if that's been recorded before
Author
Topic: Smallhands - nearly 40 years and still tiny! (Read 441388 times)