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[Frumple]

Dammit Mario, you've bought the plague to the Mushroom Kingdom!

a spin-off of a Mario game where you play as a character to get rid of the plague Mario unknowing.y brought to the Mushroom Kingdom sounds fun. A likely candidate for the player character might be Dr. E. Gadd

I mean, that obviously seems like a prompt for a shovel knight crossover starring Plague Knight.

Alternatively a darkest dungeon one with the plague doctor. In any case you need the beak if you're going to be doing that.

[martinuzz]

Hmmm, thinking about this 3 phase protocol for a while, it might be a good idea for me to try and get corona ASAP and infect as many of my good friends and relatives fast as possible, while there are still good hospital spots available.
( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

[TamerVirus]

2-5 week all expenses paid* vacation at the hospital, but spaces are going fast!
Meet new people! A real breathtaking experience!
Call now!
1-800-COVID19
*offer not valid in the United States

[MetalSlimeHunt]

Hmmm, thinking about this 3 phase protocol for a while, it might be a good idea for me to try and get corona ASAP and infect as many of my good friends and relatives fast as possible, while there are still good hospital spots available.
( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

I'm onto you, Rick.

[Naturegirl1999]

Hmmm, thinking about this 3 phase protocol for a while, it might be a good idea for me to try and get corona ASAP and infect as many of my good friends and relatives fast as possible, while there are still good hospital spots available.
( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

I'm onto you, Rick.

question, how does this spare the economy? It makes no sense to me

[ZBridges]

My school has suspended all in-person class meetings.  Exams will be offered in an online format, and students are being encouraged to go home, though the dorms will stay open for those that can't.

I imagine we'll be seeing a lot more of this as the spread of the virus gets closer to being a pandemic.

[Teneb]

Mamma mia! Molto schifo! Mi son strappato i peli del cazzo.

You were the scelto! It was said that you would destroy the Corona, not drink it! Bring balance to the peninsula... not leave it in plague! You were my fratello Italy! I loved you!

_{I am possibly sorry}

[Max™]

Wonder if it would be worthwhile to try and encourage others to use the phrasing "newly discovered cases" rather than "new cases" because the implication is both more alarming and more accurate.

Mother-in-law needed help with her phone, wanted me to see if I could find a back up password for her facebook she accidentally deleted or some shit. I haven't touched facebook in half a decade, I use phones as cameras with extra bullshit I ignore... I'm not going to be the most helpful tech support to begin with, but naturally that wasn't the worst part.

For some reason she was over at a neighbors house playing with their new baby and kids, said neighbor is apparently a vegan with "meat allergies" and a nasty infection of anti-vax brainrot, yet for some reason after she gets back from there and asks me to touch her phone she's surprised when I refuse to get closer than a few feet from it. I don't need to incubate something, wind up recovering fine, and infect everyone else, kthxbai, going upstairs now, wash your hands more.

[Doomblade187]

While I actually do know someone with a meat allergy, anti-vax stances are something I don't support.

[coalboat]

Phone is an often neglected hygiene hazard. So are wallet and keys.

[Rolan7]

Letting someone else touch my handbrain is uncomfortable to me.

[Laterigrade]

I was going to make a joke about how Martinuzz is dead and you’re sending a message from beyond the grave in the hopes of someone noticing your secret code which details the truth of the afterlife and the eternal torture of hell therin, but then there were ninjas, and I coukdn’t figure out a good joke, so instead here’s a highland cow.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Hell is empty, and all the ninjas are here.

[Imic]

I know someone whose dog is allergic to meat, her skin turns pink and her hair starts falling out if she has any for a few days straight, so her owner needs to cook up all of her food herself since vegetarian dog food isn’t exactly common fare.

[delphonso]

I know one of those people who got bit by a tick and became allergic to meat. They have a weird range of acceptable animal proteins, though. Milk is alright, but cheese isn't, for example.

[martinuzz]

So 5 Republicans, including Trump's Chief of Staff, have been quarantined, yet Trump says he refuses to be tested himself.
I wonder if that's just rhetorics. Tbh I think he used up 99% of all available tests on himself.