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[Glass]

Because there’s a difference between “chaos” and “lolrandumb”?

Also, iirc, if he ever loses a challenge, he’ll die.
And you’re giving it specifically to people likely to lose challenges.

[Egan_BW]

Challenges are bad.

[Glass]

They’re an implicit part of the game and they represent the whims of the chaos gods.

[Imic]

A boon could be easily given to counteract another boon.

[Egan_BW]

They’re an implicit part of the game and they represent the whims of the chaos gods.

I follow explicit rules, not implicit ones, surely not when told to be a chaos god! A better boon, then;

To whoever rejects the boundaries of this exercise, grant the boon of Disobedience, such that failing the task does not result in death.

[Glass]

I follow explicit rules

Ok.

PROPHETS
You are chosen by the Gods to carry their wishes into the world. You begin as a norma human, though you may ask for one blessing or boon upon your ascendency (which I will roll for). Your job is to compete with each other and carry out tasks which Chaos has assigned to you.

The winner will receive several “blessings” determines by the Gods, while the loser will immediately, uh, “expire”.

[blueturtle1134]

Hrmm, if I understand this right...

To whichever prophet is free-thinking enough to  disclaim the puerile and orderly task they are "supposed" to be doing and instead follows their own whims, grant the gift of Mutally Assured Destruction, such that when they perish their body will be converted into antimatter and shatter the planet.

If this isn't allowed than you are a disgusting agent of order~

1. I rather enjoy living.
2. I believe that you can see at the end of 8 bit theater that a state of pure entropy, while technically “chaotic”, is functionally equivalent to a state of pure order, and you would be bringing us rather closer to universal entropy.
3. Destroying the entire planet also ends millions or even billions of lives, each of which could have completely derailed the timeline (or could give rise to other lives which could do the same), in exchange for a relatively small number of planet pieces flying through space in a purely mathematically-predictable manner.

You guys are vastly overestimating the energy this suggestion is going to release. Even assuming perfect conversion of the prophet's body mass plus an equivalent mass of planet into energy, the output is only about 46 Tsar Bombas. You're going to lose a couple of cities, but it's barely going to scratch the planet. (Not sure whether there would be more or less fallout though)

Please continue. This is funny.

[Glass]

You guys are vastly overestimating the energy this suggestion is going to release.

If a chaos god declares that it is intended to shatter the planet, then the math is probably getting thrown out the window.

[chubby2man]

Turn 3
(Turn 2 of competition)

Jack shoots a glare at Zultan, then gathers his flock.
Off to the church, to persuade those remaining there of our greatness and virtue, and why the way of these so-called “chaos” gods truly is the best for all - freedom and equality for everyone, working for the best of themselves and others, none pushing down on others, rather raising ourselves together!
Of course, make use of my new sight - use their desires, and show them what they could be, and prove to them that our way can bring them to their greatest potential!

(4)
Jack strides through the church doors  with his followers in tow. The churchgoers turn to you with a gasp. You see the fear and the hidden desire for something greater, what they could become. The young priest tries to get their attention back to their prayers, but he has totally lost their attention.

You tell them instead of freedom and equality, of realizing their true purpose. Seeing their desires and their potentials allow you to craft truly potent arguements. However, their fear and tradition holds the majority of them firm.

”bless” random prophet Jack the prophet with “the cheesefall”; at random intervals a complete wheel of cheese will manifest roughly 10 feet above the chosen prophets and land on their head

A voice booms through the church, full of dread purpose and ancient power.
“CHEESEFALL” it proclaims, and a whole wheel of cheese falls down on Jack’s head.

Seeing food miraculously appear grabs their attention, and Jack is quick to promise that those who follow Chaos will never go hungry again. This seals the deal for the rest of the crowd.
(+26 converts)

Meld 20 sacrificed people  with power of chaos into magnificent chariot, mouths of sacrificed people constantly yell to bow before Rahx the voice of chaos, scream sanity shattering truths, utter curse spells at unfaithful or spit rainbow flames

Gift it to Rahx

First sacrifice, nothing, not a word. No, not enough perhaps. More must be offered, maybe in a different way.

Nameless, still. No title other than prophet. If I cannot gain favor of chaos by sacrifices of the foolish, then lets find some... people to convince.

Spoiler: Easy coin, easy followers (click to show/hide)

Find a local bandit group, convince them to convert to chaos as new champions with ease of access to their desires, demonstrate if they demand proof of the power of the gods. Work with them on raids to acquire coin/valuables in any other places of the world. There are more villages out there right? Any raids will have ritualistic sacrifices using the knife, for any chance of boons/conversions.

Maybe this will serve as a greater sacrifice.

The Prophet of Rahx boards his chariot and rides into the woods. The chariot, a hideous amalgamation of flesh, screams hideous truths as spinning legs churn the ground, sending it flying through the woods.
(3)
You don’t find much of anybody, much less a bandit camp, aside from a pair of hunters who you terrify into submission. (+2 converts)

Go to the keep and demand everyone there to bow before my god, then laser some furniture to show I'm serious about the face melting, and if they don't bow down they get their faces lasered off.

(6)
The Prophet of King Zultan bursts the door to the keep open, revealing babbling villagers and the lord of the village hastily putting on armor. A laser from his eyes burns through the table in the center of the hall, sending in collapsing in the middle, sending a dozen dishes to the ground.
“Kneel before Chaos!” The Prophet thundered.
They knelt.
(+36 converts).

CONVERT RANKINGS
Glass: 39
King Zultan: 42
Rahx: 2

Grant the largest prophet’s followers the ability to be one with nature.  As for the smallest prophet’s followers, make nature one with them.

(2)
King Zultan’s converts suddenly start to turn green and feel an inner peace, while Rahx’s two followers erupt into a two shambling masses of vines and flowers. (Still count!)

Let the First Boon of Imic be presented to the Prophet who’s roll is lowest this turn, or if it’s a tie, let the boon go to the Prophet who goes last. The boon shall do the following: Whoever has it shall become innately skilled at diplomacy, at calming the furious, at placating the greedy, reasoning with the naysayer, and working your way out of trouble.

The Prophet of Rahx, surrounded by two shambling horrors and a chariot fully formed by the bodies of 20 victims that also shouts terrible truths and blasphemies, feels that he is now more diplomatic.

They’re an implicit part of the game and they represent the whims of the chaos gods.

I follow explicit rules, not implicit ones, surely not when told to be a chaos god! A better boon, then;

To whoever rejects the boundaries of this exercise, grant the boon of Disobedience, such that failing the task does not result in death.

“OVERRULED!” the Great Chubby Teddy Bear roars. A million Ewoks nestled in his fur yub-yub excitedly. “The Prophets carry out our Will! They are but slaves to our demands! They shall compete to earn the title of Highest and Holiest Prophet, and so the loser must make way for others to try their hand! The Wheel spins until it is Broken!” The god mashes his teeth, grinding a hundred souls to nothing.

“Though I think I will take the explosion idea...”

[Glass]

Now - finally - for pamphlets! The printing house cannot be terribly difficult to get to from here; I want to be printing pro-Chaos pamphlets ASAP! We shall have my converts aiding in production and distribution, with those who are most eloquent distributing at the locations of greatest traffic. They should also be going out now, to secure further conversion prior to the pamphlets being available (and they should have some of the stronger converts with them for protection).
I will be moving briskly to avoid further cheese-related head injuries, and see about acquiring an umbrella. Maybe one decorated with some silver chaos-related symbolism.

[WyrdByrd]

I meant by physical size, but this works too. Make the winner of the contest a form that truly embodies their ideals.

[Imic]

Let the Prophet who bakes a loaf of bread by themselves and sacrifice it to me receive The Second Boon of Imic: A pair of draconic wings, sprouted from the back, strong enough to carry 10 Mortals whilst in flight.

[King Zultan]

I have picked the best path, THE PATH OF VIOLENCE!
Have all of my converts take up arms and aid me in treating people with death so they join my cause, then see if I can use my followers at one with nature thing to get some animals to join me as well.

[sprinkled chariot]

Send visions with orders to join Rahx in crusade against civilization  to shamans and leaders of wild northern chaos worshipping barbarian tribes

[TamerVirus]

I bless Rahx with the presence of Dahkmeet, a talking rooster that VERY LOUDLY praises the power of Chaos to everyone he meets