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[Enemy post]

Sort the papers.

[Dustan Hache]

that's not gonna work very well kakaluncha, Especially since you're in stocks.
time to do some repair work. get an axe and slay the walking trees with it, then use the wood to try and repair the damaged buildings. let ninja elvis sit in the stocks to entertain the bored masses while he thinks about his life.
also, shouldn't the hunting party be.. ya know, hunting animals for food?

[Kakaluncha]

that's not gonna work very well kakaluncha,

Ah, your mere wooden trap can't stop pelvis movements

[Dustan Hache]

pelvis movements aren't dancing in and of themselves.

[CABL]

Keep trying to regain the control of my torn-off arm, then command it to trip the mecha.
Furniture & the frying pan: Keep Yoink pinned and smack him in the head.
Fire Elementals: Try to find a hole in the mecha, then go through it and explode the mecha's core.
Keep my distance from the mecha; if it shoots at me, try blocking the bullets with my remaining arm.

[Avetruetotheimperator]

Alright, send in the other mecha against whatever's shooting at that armored car. Meanwhile, I'm going to disengage from that giant house. Just so I can reinforce my faltering troops and devastate the horde! Who knows, maybe I'll even get to fight against a Zord or something.
Also get that tank out there, fighting stuff!

[King Zultan]

October 31, 9:00 PM
Its dark.
It's raining.
A massive army of animals and mutants has arrived in the town!
The power ranger like guy that's in charge of the army of animals has appeared and is going to fight Ziizo!
VY Canis Majoris has been destroyed!
Smoke Mirrors didn't post so random action.

Make noise and scream challenging the Power Ranger to a battle to the death

(Challenging the power ranger = 5) You step out into the open and yell out your challenge, it mostly involves you talking about how weak he is compared to you and how he's a tiny baby man.
(Does he show up = 4) Then suddenly he appears before you in all his power ranger like glory, and he says that he excepts your challenge and he will show you who's the real tiny baby man, you also note that he has a legendary weapon of some kind and that it glows with legendaryness like its radioactive.

IGNORE/SWAT AWAY HALLUCINATIONS

GET TO KITCHEN

SEARCH FOR SNACKS       

(Ignoring/swatting away the furniture = 4) You ignore the funiture as it struggles to get to you and fails to do so in zero-g.
(Finding snacks = 4) You quickly dig through the kitchen for snacks, and you find all kinds of good stiff like chips, candy, soda, beer, and some different kinds of chips.

Shoot more aliens

(4) You shoot several more of the guys in the armoured car.
Then suddenly another mecha shows up and smashes the building your on, you get injured in the collapse.

TIME TO FINISH THIS, THROW THE SUN-NO WAIT NEED THAT FOR LIVING...THROW VY CANIS MAJORIS AT HIM, BASEBALL PITCHING STYLE.

(5) Using your massive powers you grab VY Canis Majoris, then open a portal to whats left of Super Hell and wind up and throw it like a fast ball into the portal where it burns up everything that was left of Super Hell, you feel that this did massive amounts of damage to Smoke Mirrors but didn't kill him.

(Question, where are the various moons of Jupiter headed off to since Jupiter was destroyed? Do they now join the asteroid belt? Orbit Saturn? Do they crash into each other forming an planet from the amalgamation of all of the moons?)
Head back to the tent. Practice telekinesis on one of the chairs

((Their still there in space doing Jupiter moon stuff.))
(5) You go back into the tent and start practicing your telekinesis on a chair, and after several minutes you manage to move the chair around the tent, the people in the tent with you now think your one of the aliens and trust you even less.

"Okay, that's it. Time to feel the revolution"

Using sexy pelvis thrusts, convince the citizens that a revolution to overthrow their rulers is needed, which is the only way to fix the fief's problems. Also, introduce them to anarchism, for even more chaos.

(Sexy pelvis thrusts for revolution = 1) You try to do sexy pelvis thrusting but you end up just humping the stocks, the people that pass by you give you strange looks.
(Introducing anarchism = 3) You then start yelling about anarchy but are quickly silenced when you get bag of expire pasta thrown at your head.

Sort the papers.

(2) You try to sort the papers but there's so many of them you have trouble figuring out where some of them go, and there's still more papers to sort.

that's not gonna work very well kakaluncha, Especially since you're in stocks.
time to do some repair work. get an axe and slay the walking trees with it, then use the wood to try and repair the damaged buildings. let ninja elvis sit in the stocks to entertain the bored masses while he thinks about his life.
also, shouldn't the hunting party be.. ya know, hunting animals for food?

(Finding an axe = 6) After digging around in the fief's tool storage you finally find an axe.
(Slaying the walking trees = 3) You then kill one of the living trees and the other two runaway.
(Repairing the damaged buildings = 4) You then chop it up into pieces and fix all the damaged buildings.
(Letting the Ninja Elvis entertain the masses = 3) People laugh when he starts humping the stocks, and when someone throws a bag of expired pasta at his head, but otherwise people ignore him.
(Did the hunting party get any food while they were out = 5) While you work on other things the hunting party returns with quite a lot of food, they seemed to have found enough to feed the fief for awhile.
All these thing happening raises moral.

Keep trying to regain the control of my torn-off arm, then command it to trip the mecha.
Furniture & the frying pan: Keep Yoink pinned and smack him in the head.
Fire Elementals: Try to find a hole in the mecha, then go through it and explode the mecha's core.
Keep my distance from the mecha; if it shoots at me, try blocking the bullets with my remaining arm.

(Regaining control of severed arm = 5) After a bit of concentration you manage to get control of your severed arm.
(Getting arm to trip the mecha = 6) Your arm then grabs the mecha's legs and trips it, but the mecha falls on the arm and destroys it.
(Furniture keeping Yoink pinned and continuing to beat him = 2) The furniture fails to garb Yoink because of the lack of gravity inside of you.
Then you feel Yoink digging through kitchen looking at all your snacks.
(Fire elementals finding a hole in the mecha = 4) The fire elemetals follow the mecha for a minute and eventually find a hole that leads inside of it.
(Fire elementals exploding the mecha's core = 2) But by the time they find it the mecha has started to run away from them.
(Keeping away from the mecha = 3+1 For the mecha leaving) You succeed at getting away form the mecha that was leaving.

Alright, send in the other mecha against whatever's shooting at that armored car. Meanwhile, I'm going to disengage from that giant house. Just so I can reinforce my faltering troops and devastate the horde! Who knows, maybe I'll even get to fight against a Zord or something.
Also get that tank out there, fighting stuff!

(Sending the other mecha to attack the sniper = 4) The mecha arrives just after the sniper kills a few more of your guys, then the mecha smashes the building the guys was on probably injuring him in the process.
(Leaving the house behind = 5) As you leave the house you trip over something and crush it, then get back up and keep going.
(Going back to base and helping your troops = 5) You arrive to help your guys and see them lose a few people so you act by destroying two of the attacking squads and injuring others.
(Is there a Zord = 2) You look around to see if a Zord shows up, but you never see one.
(Tank fighting stuff = 4) The tank takes out one of the animal's vehicles.

Put myself out and get out of Super Hell.

(Putting yourself out = 6) After a bit of rolling around on the ground you manage to put the fire out
(Getting out of Super Hell = 3) You try to leave Super Hell, but right as you start to leave you get hit with VY Canis Majoris and get badly burned, you're almost dead now.

NPC STUFF:

Attack stuff.

(1) They get killed by the mecha.
(5-1 For mecha attack) They lose some guys and loot some stuff.
(5-1 For mecha attack) They lose some guys and kill a few of the aliens.
(5-1 For mecha attack) They lose some guys and get some loot.

Attack stuff.

(3-1 For mecha attack) They don't really do anything.
(2-1 For mecha attack) They get killed by the mecha.
(4-1 For mecha attack)  They fall back to away from the aliens position.

Attack stuff.

(3-2 For mecha and tank attack) A massive fireball and the truck is gone.
(6-1 For mecha attack) They manage to kill some of the aliens.
(5-1 For mecha attack) They kill some random survivors.

Spoiler: Character stuff, so I don't forget about stuff. (click to show/hide)

Yoink
Health: A LOT OF DAMAGE / flaming pants / cuts / burnt
Inventory: loaded shotgun, some marijuana, a few lighters, some rolling paper

Kakaluncha / Ninja Elvis
Health: MORE DAMAGE / bloody nose / cut face / Bleeding
Inventory: a bowl, two animated trees

Dustan Hache / knight / blessed with strength
Health: MORE DAMAGE / damaged fists / broken arm
Inventory: slightly damaged Plate armour, shield, sword
Fiefdom: walls damaged, lots of food, crops in bad shape, okay moral, hunting party

ziizo
Health: FINE
Inventory: road atlas,  lime green hatchback with full tank of gas slightly damaged, large pipe, music CD, all kinds of cooking tools

Naturegirl1999 / doesn't have the power to switch bodies / has telekinesis
Health: FINE
Inventory: three canned goods, some bottled water, one person

CABL / Is a house
Health: A LOT OF DAMAGE / knees / missing one arm / no gravity inside of you
Inventory: living furniture
Some weird, hellish, 666 degree Celsius, plane of existence: five fire elementals two injured,

ANGRY_DEMON_NOISES / Is Angry Halloween Kaiju / soul magic / ULTRA OVERDEITY OF HALLOWEEN / combined with Samhain and Gates of Hell haunted house
Health: SLIGHT DAMAGE
Inventory: 4000 page waiver that has to be signed to get into the haunted house if you sign it or read it you lose your soul, one soul, posters advertising the GATES OF HELL HAUNTED HOUSE, Smoke Mirrors's ankles, thirty souls, more than six billion souls, a bunch of demons, all of Earth's gumball machines

The Canadian kitten / ability to fly
Health: MORE DAMAGE
Inventory: several cans of food, can opener, some cans of food, some bottles of water, 9mm handgun, bike, first aid kit with aspirin a few bandages and a first aid pamphlet, knife, shotgun, rifle, .44 magnum revolver

Enemy post / employee of the month
Health: FINE
Inventory: Toothbrush, rock, has a job in a "office" organizing files and papers regarding new species and issues faced by the new world

Smoke Mirrors / Angelo and Diablo / couldn't lose your soul even if you wanted to / one ankle / angel magic / OVERDEITY OF ALL HOLIDAYS / on fire
Health: NEARLY DEAD
Inventory:

Avetruetotheimperator / SPACE GUY / in slightly damaged Mecha
Health: FINE
Inventory: one mecha, three armoured cars two armoured cars missing some troops one armoured car is missing some more troops, and a slightly damaged tank, some earthnoids weapons, three earthnoids
Base in a park, medical tent, fortified

Spoiler: World stuff that might be important. (click to show/hide)

The country of Oman has been destroyed.
If you wear a costume you become whatever the costume depicts.
The more candy you have the more powerful you become.
There's a massive army of animals lead by a power range looking guy.
The apocalypse happened.
The town may or may not exist.
Ceres has been destroyed.
Jupiter has been destroyed.
Super Hell has been destroyed.
The Unholy Pail has been killed.
VY Canis Majoris has been destroyed.

[Yoink]

"OH HELL YES."

GRAB AN ARMFUL OF SNACKS AND AS MUCH BEER AS I CAN CARRY
(HOPEFULLY BUNCH OF CANS IN BEER RING, HOLD THAT IN TEETH)   

THEN HEAD TO COUCH, TURN ON TV   

CRACK OPEN BEER WITH FOREHEAD LIKE BADASS AND SHOTGUN IT (NOT LITERALLY)   

[Naturegirl1999]

Exit the tent with the floating chair and have it go towards the attacking animals. Hopefully them getting hit with wood/metal/whatever these chairs are made of will do some damage/knock them out of the vehicles

[The Canadian kitten]

Ow, fly away and land somewhere safe from the mecha. Apply first aid

[ANGRY_DEMON_NOISES]

CREATE A WORLDWIDE DEMON SUMMONING SEAL. GONNA NEED IT FOR THE R I T U A L

[Enemy post]

Hide the papers around the room to make it look like I have less work to do.

[ziizo]

Start attacking, try to trick him to disarm him of his weapon

[Kakaluncha]

Start a friendly conversation with the townsfolk, and convince them to set me free. After that, use the lake's water to resupply the crops, so they improve in quality.

[Dustan Hache]

Let ninja elvis out of the stocks since morale is starting to improve, on the condition that the next time he causes trouble here he gets guillotined.
Return the axe I used to the toolshed, and tend to both of our wounds.