Turn 27"I'm glad I threw the table in first."
Quickly kill the snakes with the holy sword, then run behind Goatsby and stab or slice at him.
"REALLY? THAT'S HOW IT'S GOING TO BE? YOU'RE PLANNING TO 'heh, nothing personnel, kid.' ME?"
HURL EXPLOSIVE, MAGIC INSULTS AT HAROLD. ORDER MY SERPENTS TO TEAR HIM APART.
(Harold vs Snakes)
5+1 vs 4(Goatsby vs Harold)
2+1 vs 3+1(Arm vs Snakes)
6 vs 2(Snakes vs Harold)
4 vs 6+1Goatsby spits insults at Harold, but Harold parries them back at the serpents. The Arm leaps around throwing punches. After the focused attacks and their own thwarted assault, the serpents slip to the ground, unable to fight on or protect their master.
ONE MORE TIME!!! DESTROY THE DEMONIC MILK MOON MUG!!
ONE MORE TIME!!! DESTROY THE DEMONIC MILK MOON MUG!!
There is obstinance, and then there is just pure idiocy. Adam will beat up Fafnir for using his powers to do nothing more than smash the enemy with no thought.
Transform back and send Fafnir to the elder plain.
Sun, use your powers to assist me in returning to normal. Or to destroy Fafnir, either is good.
(Transform)
2+2 I realized you should have been getting your "save the world" bonus to this roll, so I doubled it for this turn.
(Command the Sun)
2+1(Fafnir vs Nephalem)
2 vs 5In space, Adam finally manages to retake control of his form. Having regained his status as the sun god, he can try to command the Sun. It "helps" by transforming him back into the normal form he was already in. Fafnir then recovers and leaps back into battle to strike down this threat to the world. Adam opens a portal to catch Fafnir at the end of his charge.
Fafnir finds himself in a dimension of endless yellow void. Tentacles and eyes swirl at the strange angles of reality here.
scream at question to the other monster (the one we were preraring for before we were ambushed by the woma).
"Hey, are you okay?"
2You try asking the monster, but it doesn't seem to able to respond due to the explosion of light that destroys the castle at this moment. You manage to leap into a wardrobe just before the wave reaches you. When you emerge, the castle is a crater and Bothadtam is lying unharmed on his back. Your horse looks down at you from the edge of the crater.
I don't know if I can take this much further. I'll stop for now, and begin wandering around, looking for someone or something exciting.
4+4 for previous successes.You promptly stop increasing your shininess. However, this power proves too much to contain. The unleashed chaos of your pure unbridled shining explodes outward in a glorious blast of light that tears the castle to shreds. You recover to find yourself in a giant crater. Your new friend is emerging from a wardrobe. He seems mostly fine.
Set off in search of fox glove in a suitably musical fashion.
5Words fail to describe how epic your trek into the woods is. You march right in there, backhanding any monster, bandit, or tree that tries to get in your way. You stomp through a meadow, backhanding some interfering deer away from your prize, and pick up 50 foxglove plants. You then rip apart a tree to fashion a bow and arrow, fire the arrow, run forward to grab onto it, and ride this arrow all the way back to the village. You then finish with a stereotypical superhero landing. The merchant is very pleased and gives you 75 gold."Aaron, get down and help us with the invaders!"
Use my Silenced Sniper Rifle to kill the invaders!
5 vs 1-2Use my holy powers to create a lightning storm over the heads of the undead enemies in the castle.
6 vs 2-2"Aaron, get down and help us with the invaders!"
Use my Silenced Sniper Rifle to kill the invaders!
On it!
Let’s go wreck some invaders!
-Query, how much health do they have? I want it in HP.
(How many...HP? Why, that's simple they, um, have...er...what's that over there!)
The GM then rolls a 6 to escape over the horizon.5 vs 3-2Without Mug-ATHATH's threat, the party is able to rally against the invaders. After a bombardment of sniper fire and bolts of divine retribution, the invaders are finished off by a charge from the defenders with Aaron at their head. The siege of Castle Adjila is finally broken. The defenders and attackers rise from the dust one last time when the battle ends. They get together and kneel before the party in thanks. They then fade away, leaving you alone.
The sky rumbles. A massive portal to the Elder Plane rips the fabric of reality. Through it falls a largish object. The blackened tin and ominous handle are unmistakable. This can be none other than the Unholy Pail. Dark power gathers around it as it prepares to crush you for daring to stand against it. Then another threat emerges.
The shooting star that's been looping around the world finally lands. It crashes into the castle gatehouse. The gates then shake and burst from the inside. A single human figure stumbles out, with smoke trailing behind him. He then points directly at the party.
"I SAID. GROGNAR. SMAAASHH!!!"
"Onwards brothers, Kane shall have his milk! First off, those with armor go at the guards head on, while those who don't sneak around and attack them from behind, and anyone unarmed should stay back until the farmers are captured. For Kane!"
Command the Nod Horde to capture the farm for Kane, and subdue the guards.
(William vs Farm)
1 vs 4(Horde vs Farm)
1 vs 3Together, the Nod troops storm the base with their faction's distinctive mix of stealth and the occasional bit of overwhelming force. The attack doesn't actually make much progress this time. When the farmers spot the invaders, they knock down a false windmill. Inside is a ramshackle wooden construction of two false legs supporting a rotating array of three incendiary alchemical cannons controlled by a pilot. The makeshift artillery forces the main Nod attack into cover.
Blinking in confusion, Florence will ask where is she. She will also ask for supplies.
3?"Why, you're in Bedlam Manor! Where else should you be? And of course we'll get supplies for that banquet next Sunday, you need only ask."
You thank your father for his appropriate concern and the rest of the family files out after a long succession of similarly polite conversations. You deal with each with the appropriate dignity and patience expected of a noblewoman. Certainly, you don't show any behavior that a mad scientist with disfiguring scars might find more entertaining. You would have nothing to do with such a person. You recover from your nasty accident and admire the view outside. The Sun is the same benevolent presence it always is. Underneath, your servants and villagers work diligently and with no milk-related chaos.
The banquet is of course a resounding success. There's only one flaw. You forgot to offer any milk. Nobody is much concerned and continues with the banquet. The prestige afforded by such an occasion allows your family to marry you off to the Von Baron family. This arrangement brings much wealth to both families, and you spend the rest of your days contentedly raising children before passing away without a struggle.
You suddenly wake up bolt upright. You're sitting in the mud outside Moorsburg. The Sun is screaming insults above alongside a fleshy version of the moon, a giant mug winks out of sight, and your used chloroform rag is on the ground next to you. A chicken is standing on your head. At least you aren't trapped in that twisted nightmare anymore.
Apologize to the Moon for using Suggestion on it, and thank it for helping me.
Then, ask the Sun how I can assist.
5"No problem, man. What's a few spells between friends?"The Moon is impressed by your apology and seems to regard you as a friend now. The Sun then gives your orders.
"WELL, THE USEFUL MUG JUST TURNED INTO SOME TINY GUY. WHAT A WASTE. ANYWAY, THE TINY GUY IS THE SUN GOD NOW. PLEASE KILL HIM SO I CAN DESTROY THE EARTH WITHOUT HIS INTERFERENCE. ALSO IGNORE ANY ORDERS I GIVE YOU TO THE CONTRARY."SHRUG AND, UNLESS I SEE ANYTHING ELSE OF INTEREST, CONTINUE ON HOMEWARDS WHILST PRACTICING MY ZOMBIE-BEAR-CHOIR CONDUCTING SKILLS. PARK A SAFE DISTANCE AWAY FROM MY BASE, IF SUCH A THING IS POSSIBLE.
3-1 for wagonYou clatter on your way. Struggling to keep your attention split between conducting, driving, and turning various valves to prevent explosions causes you to forget that the compass is three hours behind. You don't make any real progress this time.
"ow"
>Use magic to make it rain rocket propelled grenade-filled toolboxes on the demon.
6 vs 2You notice the demon and batter it with a rain of toolboxes. It hides under a tree to avoid the barrage.
Lament giving my milk to strangers without first examining what they gave me in return. Then again, maybe there's a way to repair the damage...
Go on another adventure for useful potion materials.
4You head out into the wilds to hunt for more potion materials. There's other places you could go for materials, but the spider cliff is familiar to you now and you have the gear to make it an easier hunt. You go there and kill every spider in sight before sitting down and waiting for more to show up. It's tedious work, but this cycle eventually gets you quite a bit of spider milk and materials.
You also find a good number of inexplicable coins and collection badges.
Sun Action:"Help" Adam3The Sun is forced to assist Adam by his authority as the sun god. It resents this, so it simply provides redundant help getting him back to normal to technically fulfill its orders.